


No Scrooge-ing!

by 7cinnamonroses



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern: No Powers, But lots of steam!, Christmas fic, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Family Drama, Feels, Humor, Mutual Pining, Naughty Cookie Eating Shenanigans, No Sex, Orphan Rey, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn, Snoke Being a Dick, Snowed In, Tropes. All of them!, Warm and Fuzzy Feelings, Wet Dream, girlfriend experience
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-05
Updated: 2018-02-25
Packaged: 2019-02-11 00:58:00
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 16
Words: 78,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12923898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/7cinnamonroses/pseuds/7cinnamonroses
Summary: It’s the most wonderful time of the year… unless you are Kylo Ren, a very single lawyer living in New York, who has three weeks to find a girlfriend to bring home for Christmas with his estranged family. The request his boss had doesn’t help! Nor the fact that the young British Art student he hires as his “girlfriend” is so damn cute. And don’t get him started on the snowstorm!





	1. Falalalala lalala ugh

**Author's Note:**

> Why finish one of the in-progress stories when I can start a new one?  
> This is it! The Modern Day!Fake Relationship!Cuddling For Warmth!Christmas!Girlfriend Experience!Snowed In!AU no one asked for. Who said you had to settle for one or two tropes? It’s the Christmas/Star Wars season and we all deserve to have our cake, shove two more cakes into that cake and eat it the whole damn thing!

The ringing noise had started when he had been half way through his door.  Since no one ever called him on the landline anymore it took him a moment to recognize it as his own. He would later blame everything on that noise and the perplexed state which had caused him to pick up the damn thing without second thought.  
The continuous high-pitched ring had died down and after his own voice awkwardly broke through the resulting silence of the room, one might’ve heard it replaced by the tensing of his muscles, the unwilling straightening of his back. Something in Kylo Ren’s shoulder flexed as he stood there with wide eyes and an expression that stood in vast contrast to his imposing figure. The chipper voice at the other end finished its teasing greeting, waiting for a reply.  
Why he didn’t just hang up on his mother would be beyond him for years.

 —-

“Told you that dumb hipster phone would cause trouble.” Armitage Hux informed him, the word hipster spat out like it was the most disgusting insult in the man’s vocabulary. Kylo knew for a fact that it really wasn’t, but then again, the ginger pest could pronounce bumblebee and make it sound vile somehow.

However, he had truly warned him about the stupidity of buying a phone that did not show caller ID. Not that it helped his situation. Or his mood.  The two of them barely got along on a good day and this was not one of those days.

“I suggest you go back to work…” Kylo ground out without looking up from the sheet of paper he was holding.

Hux scoffed, but went his way anyway, aggravating Kylo by leaving the door to his office open just a crack.

Today he would not yell! He would just count to ten, take a few deep breaths and then get up –calmly– and close the door himself. The shiny doorknob would not be grabbed too hard and neither would he practically slam the door shut.

Except that he very much did, to no one’s surprise. He was known for his temper and he’d probably worry people so much more if he had not just banged the door without so much as touching the doorknob.

Stalking back towards his large desk, he continued to formulate a reason, which would be sufficient to get out of the mess he had somehow gotten himself into. Because when his mother had greeted him he had been too dumbfounded to answer with anything but an awkward and terribly shaky; hello, Mom.

It must’ve been a reflex, some leftover from his childhood that had caused him not to tell her that she had the wrong number and never to call again. Instead he had suffered her insistence on calling him _that_ name, had registered her own expertly veiled nervousness. He still knew what signs to listen and look for with her. Being a diplomat, Leia Organa knew how to disguise doubt as confidence and her political role had taught her how to spin half-truths out of utter and complete lies. Her son had never bothered to ask whether she enjoyed it or not, because he assumed to know the answer.

Everyone enjoyed doing what they are good at, didn’t they?

Showcasing the extent of her abilities, his mother had done the impossible.

She had him agree to visiting on Christmas.

And now he had to get out if it.

 —-

There was no way out of it.

Not after his boss had visited, having heard the news. The old man had been beside himself with glee, which at first had surprised Kylo. There was no love lost between his mother and Nicholas Snoke. She had fought him back when he had first attempted to become a member of the Supreme Court and had cost the man his victory. All while Kylo had been shadowing the man. That had been a fun time in the Organa Solo household!

The surprise at his mentor’s joy ebbed away when he was told in no uncertain terms that this would be the perfect opportunity to gain inside knowledge. To find something to discredit his mother and while he was certain that he would not find anything –all the dirt had been brought to light 6 years ago and it had barely slowed her progress in the world– he still refused. Snoke’s whithering smile as he leaned towards the significantly taller man sent cold waves up and down Kylo’s spine. 

“Are your loyalties not with me? Do I have to be concerned?” he sounded deeply disappointed. “I understand it to be a hard task, my boy. But think about it. She lied to you before. Would’ve chosen her misguided path over your success… While your qualms are noble, don’t you think them misplaced?”

He had thought on it. What he said wasn’t wrong and yet… he didn’t want to. And anyway, everything had been uncovered years ago. Surely, even if he did go looking, he’d find nothing. Would it hurt to agree to this when truely there was nothing to find? Snoke would know that he was loyal to him.  
With a heavy feeling in his gut, he nodded his consent.

“Very good, my boy. I would have hated to remove you from the firm.” He old man had purred. “Take someone with you!” Snoke had told him with a shrug, changing the subject. “Someone nice. They’ll be too busy asking questions about her to bother you much while you’re there.”

This would have been a wonderful suggestion if it hadn’t been for the tiny, insignificant detail that he was short on female company at the moment. At least the kind he could take along on a trip to the snowed in mountainside of Aspen where his parents owned a house. To meet his parents. During Christmas. The implications and gravity of it would send half of the women he did know running and the other half would jump to the ridiculous conclusion that this meant something.

Only one came to mind who would neither run –it wasn’t in her nature– nor would she get any romantic notions into her head. However, the mere thought of Phasma sitting down at his mother’s mahogany table while sporting an expression which would even have his father reconsider addressing her just seemed wrong. He knew from experience that he could take her on, yet he sometimes wondered whether the tall blonde from time to time entertained thoughts of how she could make people’s death look like an accident. No. Phasma was out of the question.

Which meant that he was truly and hopelessly fucked!

 — 

Two days of considering, planning and dismissing any of the considerations and plans he might’ve come up with. Two days of deteriorating mood and the exhausting work-out routine it resulted in. Two days of almost calling several women –including his mother to cancel, Snoke be damned!– only to stop himself before calling. Kylo Ren was at his wits end.

He’d have to go alone. Three weeks until Christmas and the damn season was ruined for him. Usually, the holidays didn’t bother him too much. It had been 6 years since he had seen or spoken to any family member, yet he had made it work. At 24, back when he had broken it off with them, he had been pretty sick of the fake smiles for Christmas Cards, the forced bliss at the table, the barely contained disputes and clashing personalities under the Christmas Tree. It had all been wrapped up in ribbons and tinsel. Making nice.

It had all felt so dishonest, so he didn’t miss it in the years to follow. Now, just having turned 30, he had developed a routine which suited him and if he didn’t feel the Christmas spirit that year, well why force it? He enjoyed the decoration as long as it wasn’t too modern –he preferred traditional reds and greens to the horror that were pink and sparkly themes. In fact, he enjoyed them so much more because there was no pressure whatsoever to put up a single Christmas candle in his own home. Had he wanted to, he’d have someone decorate his place. But he found it so much nicer to be surrounded by Christmas but having a sanctuary where he’d be left alone with it.

In the office, Snoke had allowed for a few tasteful but discreet decorations to keep people’s spirit up. The man himself couldn’t care less and probably would’ve had them work through the holidays if only he could’ve.

When an intern had referred to him as Scrooge a few years ago, he had not found it in him to tell on her.

All this however, did not bring him one step closer to finding someone to accompany him to Colorado.

There had to be a solution.

Something or someone he had not considered yet.

It was a Friday night and he did not feel like leaving the apartment. The merry lights in the streets had seemed to taunt him. Alas, he had to suffer them as well as a decorated room full of business partners and their wives, husbands, girlfriends and boyfriends. Since he had been wrecking his head with who to bring as a date to his mother’s Christmas get-together, he elected not to have someone attend alongside him. He could bear not suffering the possibility of awkwardness should Snoke ask a mere acquaintance whether she had already packed for the trip to Aspen.

Hux being Hux, did not pass the opportunity to comment on his lack of a partner, a very pretty Asian girl accompanying him as he made his way over to where Kylo was standing.

“Don’t tell me you couldn’t find someone to attend this gala with you. I find your manners so much improved since last Christmas.”

He was really beginning to develop a strong dislike for the English accent thanks to his co-worker. The man’s date frowned up at Hux, but quickly schooled her expression into one of passiveness.

“Paige, dear, this is Kylo Ren, Snoke’s little stand-in when a case isn’t important enough. Ren, this is Paige Tico, one of this year’s finest graduates of Harvard Law.”

To her credit, she smiled at him, her embarrassment well hidden.

“Good evening, Mr. Ren.” She offered with a friendly nod.

“Miss Tico.” He replied. “How much does he pay you to suffer his company? Not enough, I assume.”

The effect that the angry blush which crept up Hux’ neck improved the whole exchange. The girl grinned before leaning her head to the side until it came to rest on her date’s shoulder.

“I’ve known this one for such a long time. Money could not buy it, isn’t that so, Armitage?”

He shook her off and almost dragged her away from him. Kylo chuckled as he reached for a glass of champagne. Riling up Hux always improved his mood.

An hour of the polite small talk he hated so much later, he found himself ordering a scotch, calculating that he could probably leave in about 20 minutes without seeming rude, when a good humoured voice startled him.

“150$ an hour and as many drinks as I like as long as I am not making a fool out of myself.”

Turning his head to the side, he saw as Rose Tico beamed at the bartender, ordering a Cosmopolitan.

“So, are you…?”

He had read about female students prostituting themselves in order to pay for their studies. It should not shock him to find out that she apparently was one of them, but he was. Kylo admittedly had ideas of how prostitutes looked and pretty Miss Tico in her classy grey cocktail-dress and simple yet elegant topknot did not fit the picture. Getting his meaning she giggled.

“Goodness, no. There isn’t enough money in the world for me to even consider sleeping with him.” she thanked the bartender for the drink. He just stared at her in bewilderment and as she took the first sip from her magenta coloured drink, she caught his gaze, making a sound in the back of her throat. “Don’t tell me you’ve never heard of escorts.”

Of course he had! Excuse him for having assumed that it was just the fancy term for hooker. He felt himself blush and hated himself for it.

“What made you think it’d be a good idea of telling me this? If you haven’t noticed, your… Hux does not exactly like me.” He told her in a voice he hoped sounded bored and unfazed.

“Oh no, he’ terrified of you, is what he is. Also; he just left and I decided I’d stay to socialize.”

At the surprised expression he gave her, she rolled her eyes. “I am indeed the finest Harvard Law graduate. You don’t become that by simply reading books. Reading people tells you so much more at times.”

“Is that even allowed?” he heard himself ask without thinking and at her puzzled expression, he clarified. “Your… job? Isn’t there a codex in Harvard against that?” There was a codex for and against everything at the old and prestigious collages and he was certain Harvard was no exception.

“I work for a law firm. Why would that hurt any propriety codex?” she asked sweetly and lifted her drink again. When he continued to stare at her like she had three heads, Paige grinned. “One some weekends and this close to the holidays I accompany men to parties where they cannot go alone without it looking awkward. For my time as well as my charming conversation skills I receive a thank you in form of a few green notes. Nothing wrong with that, is it? I have a student loan to repay.”

Well, no.

“So, what’s wrong with you? And I don’t mean your temper. Hux wouldn’t shut up about it.” she asked suddenly.

“Excuse me?”

“Tall guy, broad shoulders, good fashion sense, acceptable manners when not provoked. So why exactly are you alone, Mr Ren?”

This might be a ruse. A scheme initiated by Hux to embarrass him. She only shrugged when he growled that this was none of her business. Paige Tico, unfazed by his answer took her glass in hand, wished him a pleasant evening and made to leave. Suddenly however, it came to him. The solution to all his problems. The house in Aspen had enough bedrooms. He could hire someone to pose as his girlfriend for a few days! They’d sleep in separate rooms. Kylo had never been one to flaunt affection openly, so if he did not kiss her either, it would not look weird.

This could work!

“Miss Tico… Are you… What will you…. Are you free for Christmas?” he asked loud enough so she could hear. With a surprised look back at him and a slight, apologetic smile, she walked back to him.

“Sorry, but Christmas itself will be spent with my family.”

He sighed. Of course it wouldn’t be this easy. How did you get an escort? Were there agencies? He couldn’t ask Hux how he met his ‘girlfriend’! The idea of ordering some woman on the internet appeared in his head and he felt sick by the very notion.

“However, I have an absolutely lovely friend who I know happens to be free this Christmas. I’ll talk to her.” She fished a card out of her purse and offered it to him. “Call me tomorrow. If Rey is up to it, I’m sure she’d love to go to Aspen.”

“How do you…?”

“Hux really, really hates your guts.” She paused. “Or has a crush on you. It is hard to say.”

Flustered, a bit angry and definitely intending to strangle Hux, he grabbed her card, shoved it into the inside of his jacket and hurried away.

As soon as he got home he hauled the old-fashioned phone against a wall. The damn thing had had it coming!


	2. ...in jingle bell time!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Wow, thank you guys so, so much for your comments, kudos, subscriptions and bookmarks! You really made my day and  
> kept me writing :)  
> This has not been beta-read or anything so I apologize if I missed any mistakes. Hope you'll enjoy chapter 2!
> 
> P.S.: I made a mistake in the first chapter. Paige actually earns a 150$/hr on her night with Hux.

Chapter 2

 

He had nodded off while doing some research. If he was to even so much as consider calling Ms Tico, he wanted to know what he was in for. Upon beginning his search he had been wise enough to include ‘wiki’ while typing. Nowadays you could barely google anything without seeing porn. He could live without knowing what he’d find if he were to use a slightly different wording.

After he had woken up on that grey and cold Saturday morning, the first thing he did was cleaning up his browser. He really didn’t need that kind of questioning should someone stumble upon it. Especially if he took it with him to his mother’s house!

While drinking his first coffee, he still wasn’t certain what to do, moving the card he had received between his fingers in a nervous fashion. Prostitution was illegal, he knew that of course and while Ms Tico had insisted on not being a prostitute, the law had a rather different view. Considering that he did not plan on sleeping with the girl he’d probably move within a legal grey area. Also, who’d know apart from himself, Ms Paige and that Rey girl? It would be a one time thing. He certainly had no need to hire women to spend time with him. It would be a professional transaction.

With a sigh, he leaned his head into his open palm, elbow resting on the dark cool marble of the counter. What was he thinking? He could not put his position in jeopardy just to have a distraction for his family while he went looking for something that might not even be there in the first place. This whole matter was ludicrous and he was about to tear the card apart, when his phone began to vibrate next to him, showing Snoke’s name on the display. Wondering how the old man always knew when he was about to decide against one of his suggestions, he picked up the phone.

“I have the perfect girl for your little family get-together!” Snoke announced without greeting.

What?  
This wasn’t good.

“Sir?!” he heard himself ask, feeling like a stupid boy who had to be lead through life.  
Snoke chuckled.

“Her name is Bazine. She is a lovely girl and very capable when it comes to –ahm– finding hidden secrets. Maybe you heard of her? She was so kind as to lend her abilities to our causes in the past.”

Of course he had heard of Bazine Netal! He had never met her himself, this kind of work being too far beneath him, but he knew that she was a private investigator of the most effective kind. She was said to be an incredibly beautiful woman, a great actress and ruthless when it came to fulfilling her assignments.

He couldn’t bring that person to his mother’s house! Whether there was something to find or not was of no consequence. This he couldn’t, wouldn’t do. If his mother had done something illegal he would find it, not some paid freelancer who might get him in trouble by taking things too far.

“I already asked a friend of mine to come with me.” Kylo lied quickly.

Snoke sounded surprised and wondered whether the girl could not be persuaded to step back from the trip, Ms Netal obviously being more qualified for their purpose. What had the girl’s name been again? May? No, Rey! He was certain it had been Rey.

“Sadly, we already booked the tickets and I informed my mother about bringing Rey with me.”

For a moment he wondered whether Snoke had hung up on him, as silent as the line suddenly had become.

“…Miss Netal might just as well change her name for a few days.” The old man growled, still trying to stick to the other woman.

“I–I sent her a picture. You know her, she’s always been terribly invasive.”

It was weird how easy these lies came to him and for a moment he felt bad about it. Snoke had been his mentor, always concerned about what was best for him and his future. But…

“Very well then. I probably should not have jumped to the conclusion that you were unwilling to follow my advice when you were alone last night.”

After the call had been terminated, he sighed.

It was settled then. This Rey girl better be up for a trip to Aspen. He’d hate to have lied about this as well.

 

 

“Won’t your client have trouble explaining as to why he is showing up with a new girlfriend out of the sudden?” Rey asked, taking a bite from the bagel Paige had presented her with when she had stepped out of her room that morning. The brunette had known something was wrong and when the other girl had begun the conversation by begging her roommate not to kill her, Rey had known that she had been correct in assuming the worst. Conversations beginning like this barely went to the advantage of the person asking not to be killed. Same went for “Don’t get mad!” and “I can explain!”, in case you were wondering.

Indeed, her first reaction had not been favourable. She had been pretty mad at her friend to be honest. Had snapped at Paige whether she wanted to step in her boss’s shoes now. Patient and calm as always, the dark haired girl had explained the situation while presenting her roommate with the one thing that always eased her anger; food!

Rey knew that Paige sometimes made a few hundred bucks on the side by attending balls, galas, dinners and other events along with men who were lacking female company. She had found out this spring, when her friend had been leaning over some contemporary art magazine with a tired look in her eyes. All Rey had been told was that an acquaintance of hers wanted to take her to this gallery and that she somehow needed not to appear like a complete imbecile when it came to art. Of course she had helped out, knowing the Gallery as well as the pieces on display at the moment.

Later that night, an envelope with a crisp 50$ note had been slid under her door. Upon asking about it, Paige had explained the situation. So yeah, she had actual proof that the job paid well.

Never having considered becoming an escort herself, the concept of people paying just for a woman to simply be there, look pretty and hold a conversation was ridiculous to her. At first she had thought Paige was sleeping with her clients. That she could’ve wrapped her head around. But apparently the agency Paige worked with was one of the few places that actually did not even offer that as an option. She had heard a few tales of Maz Kanata and her strict policies on the matter and that women did not sound like a person to be messed with.  
Rey wasn’t sure about the whole thing yet. Not that she was entirely unwilling. The money was good and getting paid to have dinner with someone on Christmas did not sound like too bad a deal. She could use that kind of money. One of their professors was planning to rent a Gallery to showcase this year’s best works and four of her own works had been selected. However, each student had to chip in with the rent for the place. While the pieces on display might be bought by the visitors and patrons, there was no guarantee that someone would take notice of her creations. Exposure was important though, so Rey was determined to come up with the money somehow. Escorting had not been on her list of possible ways to accomplish that task however. But… It couldn’t be this bad, right? Her roommate had always appeared to be quite comfortable with her second means of an income, and while not from a rich family, she knew that nothing could have moved Paige to stay in a position she did not feel comfortable with. The Tico sisters knew that there was a tiny, but warm home they could always return to.

Rey had nothing even close to that, no one who might volunteer to pay for repairs or send a large package of food for the three girls in times of exams, despite one of them not being their daughter. Mr and Mrs Tico had done both. When they had unpacked the cartons of noodles, canned fruits and vegetables they had found a few pages of recipes for 3-4 people that were easy and quick to cook.

Rey wondered whether the natural confidence both sisters moved through life with was rooted in the knowledge that someone would always be there to have their back. To love and protect them, no matter what happened.

She wouldn’t know. She had been dropped in front of an orphanage when she had been around 4 years old. All her pride and confidence was drawn from the knowledge that she had taken care of herself. That she paid the bills, carried her own weight and was fulfilling her dreams on her own. That despite being an abandoned child who had been brought to a foreign country at the age of 12, forced to work hard under harsh conditions, she had never fit the stereotype. She had not become one of those teen moms people were so scandalized by, had never even smoked, let alone taken drugs. This was what she had in ways of reminding herself that she had earned her life and this made her confident. It was during Christmas that it became harder to pretend that she didn’t wish it to be different. That she would have loved nothing more than to have parents who sent nice little gifts for good grades or her own family being excited for the possibility of some of her art hanging (and in one case standing) in an actual gallery where people could look at them and maybe even purchase them.

But then again, her life was what it was. She still made sure to let the orphanage in England know every new address of hers. Just in case. Someone, some day might want to find her. Yes. Some day.

Now however, she needed specifics. She could use the money and if one evening could truly pay for her space in the gallery, she would not have to worry about that anymore. Still, some things still made her nervous and she wanted to know more. Especially, about the guy who needed a ‘sweet girl’ to attend a Christmas party along with.

“He’s not my client.” Was not the answer Rey had been looking for, “So I’m not too sure. Not to worry though, if you agree, Maz will have him thoroughly checked before he’s going anywhere with you.”

Silence.

A disbelieving expression and…

“What?”

At least the other girl had the decency to look ashamed. Far too quickly she began to justify.

“He is the co-worker of a client!”

“You gave a stranger my number?” Rey would be speechless if there hadn’t been a billion thoughts that were very eager to leave her mouth, none of them too polite.

“No! I gave a stranger _my_ number.” After a pause the girl continued when Rey’s glare did not loose a single shred of its severity. “He can’t be so bad. My client hates him.” Paige told her in a manner that suggested that said client’s disdain was the biggest compliment that could possibly be paid to a person.

Rey reached for her tea.

“Paige, I don’t know about this…” she sighed.

“We could meet with him first.” Paige suggested. “From what I was told he has a bit of a temper, but he seemed okay. Easily embarrassed, too.” she added with a grin.

“Maybe…” Rey mumbled, when Paige’s phone went off.

“This is Paige!” she greeted and her slightly goofy expression told Rey exactly who this was. “Mr R! What a coincidence we were just talking about you.”

That was him! Rey suddenly felt incredibly pressured to make some kind of decision. But which one? It wasn’t like she could simply miss a chance to making approximately 400$ an evening. Then again… could she really do this? She didn’t even know what kind of person “Mr R” was, but if his temper was so bad that he couldn’t get a woman to attend dinner with him then she had no desire to know more, let alone meet him. Apparently she didn’t seem put off by the idea enough and before she could decide against it, Paige decided for her; “Certainly! Rey would love to!”

That earned her a slap on the shoulder before she could move away. Raising her hand in a pacifying manner she continued, aggravatingly unfazed.

“She is feeling a bit shy, though. Would you mind having coffee later?... … Well, it would be more appropriate if you knew what your future girlfriend looked like, no?... I thought so!... Great! I’ll text you the address. Be there at 4.30, we’ll meet you there. Good bye, Mr R!”

“What the fuck was that? I didn’t say yes!“ Rey fumed after Paige had hung up with a rather happy smile on her face.

“Rey, I love you, but that potty mouth of yours better be under control when we meet good Mr R!” the dark haired girl told her, grinning. Angry, Rey jumped to her feet, causing her roommate to look alarmed. “Calm down, will you?”

“Oh, like you’d be calm if I tried… to… to be your… your madam!”

When Paige did nothing but roll her eyes at her, Rey had a good mind to blow off the whole damn thing.

“The fact that you didn’t slam your door in my face this morning tells me that you are willing to at least entertain the thought. And I know for a fact that you need the money. I’ve seen the panicked look on your face when your laptop suddenly shut down the other day and would not start again for 20 minutes. Rose and I also hear about the gallery space.”

“How?”

“Finn told us about it. Apparently one of his paintings was chosen and he mentioned having to pay around 125 bucks for that. You, pride of this apartment, have 4 in the race.”

Rey slumped back into her chair.

“Tattletale…” she sighed, shaking her head.

“He’s super proud of you, that’s why he told me.” Paige told her with a warm smile, patting her friend’s hand. “Why didn’t you tell us? That’s great news.”

Rey bit her bottom lip, feeling embarrassed by what was about to come out of her mouth.

“If I can’t get the money… I might only get enough for one space and…” unwilling to finish the sentence, she changed the subject. “How come I am the pride of the apartment, HL?”

Paige made a dismissing movement with her hand.

“Oh, please, I am a glorified hooker on the weekends, I’m no ones pride!” she joked. “Which actually is the reason I want you to become one, too. Mom is beginning to like you more than me. Got to get you down on my level.”

Rey snorted.

“It all makes sense now…”

Another calm smile.

“Think about it, Rey. If you like Mr R enough to do this, this could get you those gallery spaces… and a new laptop. The rickety thing looks like it might blow up any minute anyway.” She grumbled with a side-glance towards the old, black, patched together monstrosity on the couch.

“It does the job!” Rey shrugged.

“It belongs in a museum.” Paige informed her dryly.

The sound of keys jiggling was heard and the girls heard a deep male voice, followed by a feminine giggle through the door. Rose and Finn were back. The had all decided to finally decorate their apartment today and Finn –practically living with them instead of his roomy Poe– had announced that he’d be very happy to help.

Just before they entered, Paige grinned.

“Also, a short trip to Aspen would do you good. You deserve a vacation.”

The door opened and Rey’s flabbergasted “ASPEN?!” was only answered with a “Shhhh!”. Rose as well as Paige’s family had no idea as to how exactly Paige was able to juggle her bills and finance plans this well. While Rey could kill her for forgetting to tell her that this wasn’t a mere dinner in the city, she was not willing to blow her cover. It was her secret to tell.

“Oh! My! God! What are you wearing?” she heard her friend half shout, half laughing. Turning her head, she was greeted by the sight of Finn in a bright green ugly sweater, wearing a Santa’s hat, while Rose wore very cute little reindeer antlers with ribbons wrapped around them.

“He looks fantastic, shut up!” came Rose’s voice, who came over to hug Rey. “I brought hats for you two as well!” with that a fluffy hat was placed on Rey’s own head.

“You two aren’t even dressed yet?” Finn asked, hugging Paige and afterwards coming over to wrap Rey into a big bear hug. “How are you today, Miss Peanut?”

Rey grinned.

“I am fine, thank you! Sit down, I need another cup of coffee before we start.”

“Hear, hear!” Rose chirped, grabbing Rey’s own cup to refill it and getting herself a cup too.

“No! No, more coffee now. I know how it’ll be! You guys will sit down and have coffee, we’ll start talking and won’t get anything decorated.” Finn interjected, crossing his arms over his chest.

Paige, sitting down at the small round table once more gave her sister’s boyfriend an innocent glance.

“Well, it is tradition!”

Somehow Finn got them to work after only half an hour of sitting around and complaining about finals and professors. Now busy hanging every corner of the apartment with ribbons, lights, mismatched ornaments and artificial greenery, Rey was grinning to herself. This was nice! It was only her second Christmas spent with her friends and the first one ever that she had looked forward to. Last year she had still been rather shy, not wanting to impose on her new friends. Finn and Rose had still been tiptoeing around each other at that point and Paige had been dreadfully busy studying for her finals. She had known Finn the longest, but surely, when he and Rose were about to start… something she had been certain that he’d rather spent more time alone with her. When she had walled herself up in her room, the knock on the door had startled her. Her friend, proving himself to be an impeccable human being, had told her to join them. Not only on this occasion, but every time Rey was not to be found. This had not changed when he and Rose finally had become a couple after months and months of testing the waters. It had been thanks to him that she had opened up.

At some point Paige excused herself, winking at Rey. She’d later be told that the other girl had called the owner of Maz’s Palace, the escort agency she worked for, to inform her that they’d meet with Mr R later and needed one of the rooms.

“Why do we meet him there?” Rey wondered, frowning. Surely some coffee house would have done the job just fine.

“For everyone’s safety, really.”

At Rey’s shocked expression, the older girl continued.

“The client or at that point applicant may rest assured that nobody from the outside world will hear anything about the deal. Press, eavesdropper, the likes. Should he not be chosen and deemed appropriate he doesn’t get a chance to follow any of our freelancers home.”

Rey cringed at the implications.

“Did that happen to any of you? Was someone violent at some point?” She asked and if she did not like the answer she’d tell Paige to find another girl for Mr R. She was not putting her life in danger for four art pieces.

“No. Maz is thorough with both the clients as well as the escorts. There are rules and Mr R will have to abide to them if he doesn’t want to be publicly dragged through the mud. We had a guy once –before I was there– who apparently tried to pressure a girl into going further. Pictures of him with prostitutes he picked up on the street were sent to the press that very night. There must’ve been more on him because he never even lost a word about Maz’s place.”

“What if a girl wants it though? Is not opposed to sleeping with her client for a few hundred bucks more?”

Paige scoffed.

“Then she’s a stupid bitch. There are girls who make a lot more money than I do. At this point I only have 3 clients, regulars who I’ve known for a few years. 150 is a bargain deal and I charge more for events like balls or charity galas. Last night was an almost intimate affair, but when there might be pictures of me with a guy or if I have expenses like a dress or anything like that, I charge more.”

The question came before she could stop herself.

“How much more?”

Her friend grinned.

“I once charged 6000$ for a night.” She sighed happily. “Good times. He is a really nice man, too. Funny, clever and not too shabby looking. Gay as the ocean is deep however.” At Rey’s surprised look she added; “Yeah, that still is an issue. You wouldn’t believe how backward some people are, especially rich folks.”

All of this wasn’t sounding too bad. Paige tried to pick out an outfit from Rey’s own wardrobe, but in the end decided on borrowing her a simple, yet nice formfitting white and blue dress that reached Rey’s knees. Being a bit taller than Paige but of the same built, she supposed it was actually a midi-length dress. It didn’t show though and she felt very glad that there was no plunging neckline.

Finishing on her own, Paige tried to persuade her not to wear her hair in the three buns she usually wore. Rey insisted though. She felt good with this hairstyle and if Mr R didn’t like it he was welcome to pick another girl.

Giving herself a critical once over, the young woman was happy with the result. She looked good, clean and nice, nothing sexy or racy or anything that would’ve made her nervous. For a moment she wondered whether men ever made such a fuss, which brought another question forward which was quickly addressed at Paige;

“Are there male escorts, too?”

“Oh, sure! You met one, actually. My friend Timothy?! Yeah, he is one of the three guys Maz took under her wing.”

Rey couldn’t hold back a thought about true gender equality and snorted in the most unladylike manner.

They left at three-thirty. Apparently, Maz wanted to meet Rey before deciding to take her on. This was all so much more than she had signed up for.

 

 

The building was not what Rey had expected. A new, shiny skyscraper not so far from Wall St. awaited her, when she had pictured some small townhouse, pretending not to be anything but a respectable come.

Shortly after entering, Rey found herself in an elevator with five businessmen and women. One of the men eyed Paige, elegant even in just a ponytail, who tilted her head at him playfully.

“No rest for the wicked?” she wondered.

This appeared to startle him and he blushed before quickly telling her in a low voice that he really wasn’t that wicked and that Christmastime was always stressful. Paige chuckled when Rey and her left the elevator on the 16th floor.

Rey had been too busy to keep from becoming too nervous to register too much of her surroundings. All of this did not exactly feel wrong, but it felt like the second before you reached the highest point of a rollercoaster, that instant before you knew the breaks to be loosened so you’d speed down towards the ground.

A gentle nudge had her jump.

“It’ll be okay. Nothing is official yet. You can get out whenever you want.”

Could she really?

What would that Kanata woman react like if she were to tell them all that she’d changed her mind? Would Paige get in trouble?

She was so lost in her thoughts that she was somehow surprised when she found herself in a clean but cosy looking office. To her right side was a large window, decorated with real, large, red and wonderful flowers. The floor was one of dark wood, with cream coloured fluffy looking carpets positioned around the room. Two blush armchairs had been placed to face a rustic, but modern looking desk and behind that desk sat a woman with the most intelligent set of eyes Rey had ever seen. Right now they were mild and kind and the combination with the sweet smile they were given upon entering, had Rey feel a bit less on edge.

“Hello Maz!” Paige greeted cheerfully.

Maz stood up and while not tall by any means, her posture and movements as she walked towards them demanded attention and respect. She was not young anymore, yet couldn’t be past 40 yet and her smile gave her face a youthful lightness. Whether Ms Kanata had used any help to keep her dark skin as firm as it looked she honestly couldn’t tell. After she had hugged Paige, she took a step back to look Rey over.

“And you are the pretty and illusive room-mate, I presume?” she addressed Rey in good humour.

“I-Illusive?”

“Sit, ladies. Make yourselves at home… Anything to drink? No?” Maz sat down once more. “Yes, indeed illusive. You see, after Paige told me about your impromptu lesson on modern art I have been eager to meet you. Yet she tells me that you are shy. Why is that, child? Lack of mirrors where you come from? I am glad you changed your opinion, though. From what I can see, you’ll do nicely.”

Rey needed a second to decide whether to be shocked or to laugh.

“Maz,” Paige interjected quickly, sparing Rey from deciding on her reaction just yet. “Rey isn’t quite sure whether escort services are for her. She’s here to meet Mr R and see for herself whether she might like to accept his offer.”

“IF I decide on him first, that is.” The madam? Agency owner? Paige’s boss interjected. “Based on what you told me I already began to investigate and…” here she giggled. “This one is not quite the piece of cake he might look like.” And with a glance at Rey she added. “Though he did become a very fine looking young man. I had my doubts along the line…” she added almost as if to herself.

“But we shall sit down with him and see how those two get along. There’s nothing in his past that would suggest inappropriate behaviour towards women, nor did he ever express misogynistic worldviews or any of that nonsense.”

“You are looking for things like that? How?” Rey heard herself asking, rather delighted to hear that these things were taken into consideration.

Maz paused.

“You didn’t mention that she has a British accent.”

“Surprise!” Paige chirped, beaming and Maz laughed.

“Is that a problem?” now worried, Rey looked from her friend to the other woman.

“That, my dear, just added another 100 an hour.”

Her jaw dropped. It was stupid, but to hear it talked about in such a fashion was…weird.

“Your accent is still en vogue. Of course there are always clients who insist on their girlfriend being American, but most are rather delighted with someone who is a bit different from the norm.”

Like clothes or shoes or a piece of decoration. Not exactly like what the other’s had. A handpicked girlfriend for every occasion, like a sports car that had a specific and custom colour, interior… This left Rey with a bad taste in her mouth. Her time was worth a hundred more than another girl’s just because of the way she spoke English. It truly was ridiculous.

But the money…

Maz’ phone rang and she excused herself before taking the call.

“Have him sit down in the white room. We’ll join him in a minute.” She hung up and smiled. “Paige, dear, would you be so kind as to keep Mr R company while I talk to Rey a bit more? I think we are overwhelming her a little bit.”

Nodding, the other girl reached out and gently rubbed Rey’s shoulder.

“That ok?”

Rey nodded, forcing a smile.

The door closed behind the other girl shortly after and she was left alone with Maz Kanata, who leaned her weight on her elbows, folding her hands, manicured fingers resting on the backs of her slim hands.

“Tell me, Rey Doe, does that horrible brute Unkar Plutt still bother you?”

Her heart stopped.

How…?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comments are like lights on a Christmas tree.  
> I am currently on a self imposed tumblr break. But come say Hi over at contains-reylo once the 14th of December is over :)
> 
> Until then, thanks for reading!


	3. 15k Golden Rings

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU THANK YOU THAAAANK YOU!, for the lovely comments, the kudo-ing and all those subscriptions.  
> I am literally counting down the numbers to Ep. 8 (06:02:10 to go) and decided to work on this a bit since I am  
> staying away from tumblr, facebook and the internet in general really.  
> I am not sure about this chapter. I tried more humour, I tried less humour, I tried super grumpy Kylo, I tried super awkward Kylo...  
> It really is one of those Chapters that gets you from one point to the other. I hope it doesn't suck!

Chapter 3

 

Kylo’s stomach dropped as he waited for the inevitable.

Being back in his apartment, he had taken a few moments to sit down. Of course he would not allow himself to stall for long, so he had picked up the phone to do what had to be done.

The call was accepted after only a few seconds.

“Hello, Organa speaking.” his mother’s voice greeted.

He took a deep breath and let it go.

“Mother, I–“

“Ben!” she interrupted, sounding extremely happy to hear his voice. He practically saw her smile, when she exclaimed; “How wonderful to hear from you!” Choosing not to dwell on how he felt about her sudden interest in his existence. It might be the holidays or after the years of separation she had recalled having a son. Leia Organa certainly had seemed to need reminders of that fact when he had been younger. At the age of 10 he had been left in his uncle’s charge, taught far away from home in Luke Skywalker’s private boarding school. The only times he saw his parents was during the holidays and even then his mother was often absent due to work and his father…

“It is Kylo now, mother.” He corrected her.

After a moment of silence, she corrected her error, her initial joy somewhat dimmed. Ever the capable diplomat, she caught herself quickly.

“I am calling to inform you about something which concerns Christmas.”

Now she slipped. Her agitation, her worry of him cancelling apparent, she asked; “What about Christmas?”

 

* * *

 

The girl, Rey, was incredibly attractive and her voice redeemed the English accent he had started to feel a strong dislike for, ever since he knew Hux. A set of pretty hazel eyes met his gaze as she sat down next to her friend and while the small smile she gave him was a bit shy and probably forced, there was a certain quality about her face that was incredibly alluring and soothing at the same time.

“Mr Ren, this is my dear friend Rey. Like you, she is entirely new to all of this.” Paige introduced, pouring some coffee for the other girl.

He allowed himself to have his gaze wander over her face and the tightly bound brown hair. While he had eyed her physique while she had walked in, Kylo now found himself unwilling to look down further than her shoulders. It would have felt like appraising a car he was inclined to buy. From a certain point of view maybe that comparison wasn’t entirely inadequate, but this was still a human being. While he would’ve been perfectly happy to look at Rey if they had met in –say– a bar, a restaurant or even a nightclub, this here was… weird.

Rubbing his hands that suddenly felt dreadfully large, heavy and useless, he walked towards the other girl, extending one of them in greeting. She jumped to her feet once more.

“Miss Rey, thank you for agreeing to this meeting.” He said, maybe a bit too formally. She was quick to copy his slightly businesslike courtesy, straightened her back and shook the offered hand. Her skin was soft and yet the handshake was everything but.

“Hello, Mister Ren.” She responded.

A soft chuckle came from the door.

“Rey and I have to beg your indulgence. She was quite nervous about today’s meeting and I’d not be worth my share of the money if I hadn’t made sure that she felt at ease.”

He knew this voice! With a sinking feeling, his eyes left the pretty brunette and found none other than Maz Kanata. She had been younger when he had seen her last, but she was still an imposing sight. During his childhood, she had babysat him a few times and to think that the sweet woman who had told him stories was now a… an owner of an… establishment such as this… Did his mother know? Did his father? Han Solo had always known her a bit better, considering that she had been his godfather’s on-off girlfriend. Wordlessly, he stared at her.

“It is marvellous to see you, my dear boy!” the woman purred as she came closer. “Give us a hug, will you?”

His limbs were all wrong, suddenly back to the awkwardness of a 14 year old who had no idea what to do with his ridiculously long legs and arms. One wrong move and he would through over the low, round glass table that stood next to him, he was sure of it. Once he had turned his body towards Maz without destroying any part of the interior, the woman, who was easily two heads shorter than him, pulled him into a hug. Once more, he didn’t know what to do with his own arms, but he was let go before he could decide.

“Sit, sit, dearest, time is money.” Maz told him, bright smile on her face while she fell into the chair next to Rey.

This, all of this, had not been what he had had in mind at all. Paige had explained to him as to why this couldn’t simply be between the three of them when he had demanded to know why he was at an Escort Agency or whatever the hell they were called. Rey and himself apparently needed a third party to protect them and Paige lacked the means to assist her friend in case he did get the wrong ideas into his head. This had angered him and he had found himself on his feet, ready to storm out after frankly having been accused of being a potential rapist, when the door had opened and Rey had walked in.

He could have stormed past her, not owing a single person in the whole building a thing. But those large, dark eyes, the slight insecurity, which radiated from her… Kylo found his anger deflate. No need to scare her.

“I was thinking, maybe you could tell me a bit about what you’d need me to do, Mister Ren?” the very same girl inquired, hands folded in her lap. He cleared his throat, leaned back and nodded.

“My mother, uhm…” here he looked at Maz who was still grinning at him with obvious amusement. “She got me to agree to visit her over Christmas. I need third party to ease possible… tensions, if you understand.”

Rey frowned.

“Wouldn’t a friend be more suited to this than a stranger?” she wondered and here it was obvious that she was not a professional escort. Maz however nodded along as if the question had been on her mind as well.

“I don’t want to awaken possible expectations or send the wrong signals.” He replied matter of factly.

Understanding dawned on Rey’s face and she appeared to be making some sense out of him, drawing a conclusion. There could be no doubt as to what she was taking away from his answer and he didn’t like the image it might paint of him.

“…not that there are many. I work a lot… which is why-“

“Where would this meeting take place?” Maz interjected.

“Aspen.” He answered, then looking back at Rey, he added; “My mother has a house there.”

The young woman nodded, biting her bottom lip.

“How long would we be gone?” she inquired and he observed that one of her thumbs was drawing circles around the knuckles of her other hand.

“We’d leave on the 23rd and be back on the 27th. If you consent to…” here he made a gesture with his hand, “…this, I’d hand over specifics of course.”

“I’d need the address of your mother’s house as well as copies of the plane tickets… and of your passport of course.” Maz told him evenly. Now he understood. He’d take this girl nowhere without this woman knowing about it. “If Rey consents I’ll insist on her checking in with me once a day at agreed upon times that will vary on a daily basis. I trust you’ll be alright with that?”

“Of course.” Kylo heard himself reply.

“Would we… I mean uhm… would we sleep together? In one room I mean?” Rey asked, biting the lip again. Possibly a nervous habit of hers.

“No. There are enough guest-rooms so that won’t be necessary.”

“And how do you expect to explain this to your mother? Would be a bit weird in the 21st century for two adults who allegedly are in a loving relationship to insist on separate rooms, no?” Maz wondered, a bit scolding.

“We could say that I don’t feel good about it, given that I’ve never met his family.” Rey said softly and her help pleasantly surprised Kylo. He nodded.

“Or that I have work to do. Which is actually the truth. I wouldn’t bother you much.” He told Rey in the most reassuring voice he could conjure up and even though he was definitely not the person you’d choose to stop a toddler from crying, the girl caught the effort and nodded kindly. Suddenly she looked rather nervous. It made her look rather fragile…

"What if... well, in case your parents don't warm up to me? They might not like it that you'd bring someone in the first place."

Kylo made a face. His family would probably like her better than him. Most of his friendships hadn't lasted because of that very reason. About to tell her as much Maz interrupted him.

"Those are very good people you'll get to know, dear. I knew this one's parents back when he was still in diapers instead of expensive suits."

Of course she would praise them AND bring up the diapers! She hadn't lived with them when there was first yelling and then days upon days of silence followed by grand -and pretty obnoxious- gestures of love. Ben Solo had never been on the receiving end of those gestures, even though he had suffered through the shouting and the silence along with them, despite it never being directed at him. He still had trouble deciding whether the yelling or silence had been worse.

"So you know Mr Ren's family?" Paige inquired, sounding happy about that fact.

"Lovely people. A bit unconventional maybe, but their hearts are in the right place... a family trait, I hope." eyes with what seemed was an eternal youthful spark met his, silenced him and shamed him into compliance just like when she had told him that he had watched enough tv and that it was time for bed. “What do you say, dear? Doesn’t sound too shabby. Too bad Leia would know it to be a ruse or I’d grab that job for myself.” She had the audacity to wink at Kylo like any of this was even a bit funny. He himself was at a complete loss as to how to act. The situation was awkward, yet he wished to but as little emotion into this business transaction as possible. For the up tenths time he reminded himself that he would not actually sleep with her, that all she’d be there for was to divert some of the fire. And maybe to get his parents to behave, which in his humble opinion was almost worth the whole mess if it proved to work.

“May I ask how old you are?” the young woman asked without so much as a second thought it seemed.

“I just turned thirty… I suppose you are legal?”

Rey and Paige grinned, but Maz tsked.

“I run a respectable business here!” she scolded, glaring daggers at Kylo, who was taken aback.

“Well, I always wanted to know what it would be like to have an older boyfriend.” Rey mused loudly, getting Kanata’s attention. The ‘older boyfriend’ cleared his throat.

“Would you be willing to do it then?” he asked calmly, holding a smile back.

“Well… I have a few more questions, but… If you have no qualms about this, I would not mind either.” She admitted in a small voice and he felt immense gratitude towards her. He gave her a small smile and a soft Thank you, which she answered with a smile of her own.

“Marvellous. How about we talk about money for a second?” Maz got to the point. “Rey is of course inexperienced, but she is a fine young lady, who is intelligent and extremely perceptive. And she already saved your ass once just now…” she added dryly. “I am sure she’ll get along with your family wonderfully and she will be at your beck and call approximately 15 hours a day. She’ll of course have expenses due to the nature of the trip. It is –I think– safe to assume that you don’t know how to ski, is it, dear?”

At Maz’ question, the young woman shook her head.

“That means that she doesn’t come equipped with a wardrobe befitting a trip to Aspen. She can’t go on walks in the mountains, snow and everything, in sneakers.” Maz told him, one brow arched.

Rey blushed and was very eager to avoid his gaze.

He sighed.

“Let’s talk numbers.” He demanded, tired of her dancing around the figures the woman obviously already had in mind.

“A girl like Rey could easily make me 500 an hour. Since it is her first assignment however and some expenses like lodgings are taken care of, I am willing to agree on 15,000$ for the whole trip, half of it to be paid in advance so she can take care of a proper wardrobe and the likes.”

“I-I really don’t… that’s not necessary–“ the girl gaped, with Paige being quick to shutting her up by placing a gentle hand on her shoulder. Her large eyes met his once more, this time in an apologetic manner.

Fuck those were pretty eyes.

He’d get a few days of **_faking_** to lovingly stare into those pretty eyes, while his parents behaved themselves and would leave him alone because Rey would –like every person who wasn’t him– prove to be more fun. The last thought had his stomach twist unpleasantly, but he ignored it, instead, holding Rey’s gaze he muttered;

“Done.”

“WHAT?” came the girl’s shocked voice, blanching at the prospect, eyes big as saucers. Paige shushed her, while fighting giggles.

"It is settled then! Congratulations, you two. Now, should you find each other's company enjoyable I'd be willing to reserve special events for you, Mr Ren. But make the decision quickly! I have a feeling like Rey will be incredibly popular once we take a few pictures for her portfolio." Maz told them, beaming happily.

And why wouldn’t she be happy? She just made over 4000$ by having coffee and a chat.

"I-I'll not be doing this again!" Rey clarified, a rather flattering flush of colour appearing in her cheeks, looking from Maz to him and then to her friend.

"And I won't want her again..." he said smoothly. Until he realized what he just said. At Paige's scandalized expression, Maz' small smirk that said _And who do you think you're kidding?_ and Rey's own shocked doe eyes, he once more felt his ears glow. "…to... do this! Unless you want to."

"I don't!" she nodded.

"Good! You shouldn't then..."

What in the ever-living hell was wrong with him? This was Maz's fault. And Paige's. And his mother's. And ultimately the stupid phone’s... and his own, for liking dumb vintage shit.

Rey, to his great surprise smiled softly.

"You're as nervous as I am, aren't you?"

He huffed.

"It is like you're in my head." he told her, sounding tired.

 

Her laugh had been the loveliest thing about her yet.

 

* * *

 

“I’ll bring someone.” He announced to his mother who had waited on the other line with baited breath.

“E-Excuse me?” she asked suspiciously.

“I talked it over with my girlfriend and she’d very much like to come along. She’s never been to Aspen and I thought it might be… nice.” he told his mother as if talking about the weather.

“Oh that won’t be a problem at all I am sure. Well that’s great, the more the merrier! What’s her name?”

“Rey. Her name is Rey.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kylo isn't some dark space knight, so I didn't want him to be too anti-social (also the whole thing IS  
> a business transaction AND Rey does have really pretty eyes). I hope I wrote him okay.  
> We'll hear Rey's thoughts about the whole thing at another time.


	4. ...in merry measure

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You guys are so kind to this story *-*  
> Thank you a billion times to those who took the time to comment, leave kudos, subscribing and just reading this story :)  
> It keeps me motivated to work on this and I really hope this chapter won't let those of you down who told me they liked  
> the story so far <3
> 
> I worked in a few things after having watched TLJ. Nothing spoilery, I think, because if you haven't seen the movie, you  
> won't know it is what inspired me to write it in.

Chapter 4

 

15000 dollars.

Fifteen. Thousand. Dollars.

Well, 10.500 since Maz would get 30% as she had explained to Rey, but still; that was a lot of money and she didn’t feel entirely sure whether it was a reasonable amount to demand. It wasn’t like Mr Ren appeared to be hard to be around with. A bit stiff, maybe, but then again; both of them were rookies when it came to escorting. And why wouldn’t he be? He probably didn’t have problems to find women to take with him to parties and the likes. Not that he was the usual playboy type. But those ones sometimes were the worst, she had found out. Then again, there had been little to no pretence there. All rather professional, calm and restrained. There had been no leering, no incessant staring–though he did check her out, she remembered, blushing slightly– and no demands for her to, well, walk or turn for him. She had thought she’d be thoroughly inspected, which had her shuddering just before they had joined Paige and Mr Ren. But he had been polite enough, her questions had been answered in ways she had thought acceptable and while she didn’t quite feel completely at ease around him, she was optimistic that they’d get along well enough.

Which had been why, when he had first told her how long exactly she’d be required to stay with him and his family, sure, she had thought of a sum around maybe 2500 and would have been more than happy with that. She would’ve been able to pay for the room in the gallery, get a replacement for her old laptop (or have it repaired. People tended to through away too much stuff anyway!) and have part of her rent money already taken care of.

But as Paige explained later, she had to consider her own worth, whatever that was supposed to mean. While her roommate had attempted to explain the reasons for some girls being worth more than others, Rey had felt more and more nauseous. Some clients were even given some kind of discount if they were loyal to one of the girls and booked them often. The client who worked with Mr Ren apparently paraded Paige around rather often in the last couple of months, including family functions. So while he had started off by paying 300 an hour, Maz and Paige had decided on something of a holiday discount for him. It was also a sort of goodbye present to the man. Having turned out to be a rather unpleasant fellow at times, her roommate had asked Maz to find him another girl.

“She frowned when I told her I’d like us to ‘break up’. I am the second girl who ended the relationship with him and rumour has it that Maz has a three-times rule. Doesn’t like to have clients who are too much work, and he really is quite a snob, that fellow. Hates that he is dependant to pay someone, yet so, so incredibly proud of being capable to afford ‘the best’. Ugh. In addition to that, the only thing that surpasses how deep he’s up his boss’ ass is how deep the stick up his own butt is. Seriously, if there would be any danger he’d be able to pick you in the future I’d advice against it. There just isn’t enough money in the world!” she rambled over a glass of wine later that night. “But he can’t. Maz is very adamant on not setting clients who work in the same firm up with the same girl. So Mr Ren spared you from that without even knowing about it.”

“Maz takes good care of you it seems… are all… uhm… agency owners like this?” Rey wondered, refilling her own glass.

“Oh fuck no. The stories you hear sometimes…” the dark haired girl shook her head. “Maz knows a lot of people, some of them not exactly of the pleasant kind. So she knows what escorts, prostitutes and other girls in that branch of entertainment have to endure. Doesn’t stand one bit for that though. We’re offering those services because we want to and deem the men appropriate. No girl is forced to stay with a guy, no girl is pressured into getting more money. Our rates are high enough so everyone is happy by the end of the day and happy girls make for fantastic company.”

Rey nodded. It did sound nice. Anyway.

“Yeah, well, but I’ll still not do this more than once. It kind of feels wrong to demand that much money from Mr Ren when I don’t even know what exactly I’m doing.” Rey told her roommate sheepishly, but was met by a snort.

“Dude, you almost had me in stitches when you tried to decrease the prize. Sure, it sounds like a lot of money when Mr Ren isn’t asking for more than a few nice chats with the family, eating a few nice dinners, maybe bake some cookies and answer embarrassing questions about when you two will get married–“

“What?” Rey exclaimed, thankful that she had not just taken a sip from her glass.

“Believe me, it happens!” Paige giggled, very amused. “Anyway; You take care if you really want to do this but once. The money is nice, which is easy to get used to! And Mr Ren seems the kind of client who can be pleasant enough to be around with. Polite, good combination of shy and cocky–”

“–not unpleasant to look at…” Rey muttered into her glass, feeling the wine loosening her tongue.

“Not at all!” Paige pointed her finger at Rey in an exaggerated sign of agreement, the wine getting to her too apparently.

“Do you think it is true what he said though? That he’ll take an escort along because he doesn’t want another girl to get the wrong idea?” Rey wondered and Paige shrugged.

“Sounds reasonable enough to me. You heard him; he works a lot. Meeting someone for more than a well-timed quickie is hard when you have 60 and more hours of work a week. And he’s not gay, if that’s what you were inferring.” She quipped. “Poe taught me to read the radar!”

Rey laughed softly and downed her glass.

“Rey? Can I say something super selfish? This is nice. Talking about it, I mean. I’d like to spill a few beans with someone but can’t, because nobody knows about the whole lawyer by day and paid arm candy spiel.” She sighed. “Now I can gush over dump rich people and which senator is actually gay… You’ll let Maz know if he’s not nice to you, right?! Because while he was nice enough today, his colleague did mention bursts of anger. Maybe it’s true, maybe Hux just brings it out in people… Shit, shouldn’t say his name!”

Rey laughed.

“I won’t go looking for him in the phone book, I promise.”

“Ugh… Aaaarrrr-Miiii-TitCH! Who names their kid that? Armitage is not a name for a child. Sounds more like some… AI kind of…. Thing.” Paige rambled.

“I think you’re drunk!” Rey informed her as the door opened and Finn and Rose came back from having done their laundry.

“Damn right I am.” She announced as the two sat down at the table.

“Oh no, we were hoping you two would be sober for this…” Rose looked at the empty wine bottle, sighing.

“I am merely tipsy. Can’t help that she is a light-weight.”

“Pfff, heavy-weight.” Paige mumbled while resting her head onto her little sister’s shoulder. “Whaddup, Roseyposey?”

“Goodness, she is drunk!” Finn grinned, looking a bit surprised. Then he looked at Rey. “Rose and I were talking. It feels wrong to leave you all alone on Christmas. We don’t like it.”

“You’re as good as family! Like Finn.” Rose chirped, grinning at her friend. Rey was torn between blushing and having her eyes water. She always got choked up when people just… included her. To her it was far from something to take for granted. Finn had done so, immediately, never even stopping to think of leaving her behind. Decent, lovely and wonderful Rose had done the same, accepting her like a second sister.

Something very warm bloomed in her chest, threatening to cause tears to her eyes. She quickly took a small gulp of wine.

“Better than Finn, really! You actually pay rent and don’t steal my donuts.” Paige joked, earing a poke in the side, causing her to give a short cry and a laugh. “Don’t do that!”

Rey laughed along with her friends, relishing in the realization of her own luck. She had this now. Friends who thought of her as family! Friends who were worried about her and spent a moment on thinking about her being alone on Christmas! For that she considered herself lucky. She had never had that before.

It felt wonderful!

“Anyway… Paige, I thought I’d just call Mom tomorrow and tell her that Rey just has to come too! She belongs with us now!” Rose told her sister and Finn gave his girlfriend a very tender look.

“Rose…” Rey stopped speaking when she realized just how teary and choked up she sounded.

“Won’t that be great, Peanut?” Finn asked, patting his friend’s back gently.

“Fuck, that sounds amazing… sadly… uh–“ Paige began but was interrupted by Rey.

“Rose you’re too sweet! It means a lot that you thought of me, but sadly I promised to help out at work on Christmas.”

Finn and Rose’s faces fell and Rey felt incredibly bad about this half-truth.

“But surely they can spare you? Didn’t you tell me that guy Mohy volunteered to take your shifts?” Finn frowned, being correct of course. Mohy did tell her that he was actually rather thankful for the additional shifts. He was the reason she could take Mr Ren up on his offer in the first place. She had planned to use the free days to paint and sculpt and get some reading on art history done. This –her client had promised– she ought to feel free to do during her stay at his mother’s house.

“I know but… I need the money, Finn.” Rey told him sheepishly and since Finn knew that money was always an uneasy topic, he gently told Rose to drop it when she tried to convince the other girl.

Later, he caught her alone and nudged her with his shoulder.

“Hey.”

“Hey…”

“Listen, about the shifts… You know I could borrow you some money. It is Christmas and I really don’t like the thought of you being all alone here.” He told her, sad smile on his face.

Oh, Finn…

“Finn, you have to save your money for the exhibition too. I need the money to afford having my pieces shown.” Rey replied. “I have four pieces and I’d hate for one of them being eliminated from the selection because I rather sang carols instead of working.” She joked and the young man nodded.

“Yeah, I understand… But still!”

They were silent. She, because she felt bad about lying to her friend and he due to the fact that he hated the situation. If he had the money he’d gift it to her for Christmas. But his job only paid slightly better than her own and his savings were dwindling.

“I’m so proud of you, you know?” he said suddenly, dropping the topic, unwilling to make her uncomfortable. “Four pieces! I don’t think anyone got more in the run.”

Rey blushed when he side-hugged her with one arm.

“Professor Holdo just inspired me, is all. I think she put a good word in for the oil-painting to be chosen.”

Finn have her a soft clap on the back of her head.

“You’re too damn humble for an artist, Peanut… and don’t let Poe hear you praise Holdo.”

“She likes him!” Rey argued.

“Yeah, but those two clash big time. Saw them in the studio once. Never knew he could lose his cool like that, but there he was, rambling, his face red from yelling. She took it and said little, remained calm.”

Rey grinned.

“Knowing Poe, that made it worse!”

“You bet it did!” Finn chuckled.

Rey laughed along.

Yes.

She was lucky.

 

* * *

 

His mother had been fine with him bringing a girl home for Christmas.

To be honest, she had been rather ecstatic about the prospect and had asked all sorts of questions about this girl he hardly knew. He had told his mother that she was from England, that she was a bit younger than him and that she studied art.

“She never learnt any winter sports.” He had told her dully when Leia suggested they all took a nice ski-trip together. That surely would get both him and her out of it. He could barely leave his girlfriend alone while he was out having –ahm– fun in the snow.

“Oh how sad! Well, maybe you can teach her. You’ve always had a knack for instructing people.” Leia had praised, sounding more and more relaxed as the conversation went on.

“We’ll see. Maybe if she’s up to it… Anyway, I have to go.”

It had easily been the most pleasant call they had had in ages and it had been very confusing.

But it had made two things very clear; first; he needed to get to know Rey a lot better. The flight to Aspen he had booked for them would take 8 hours. Surely that would be sufficient to cover the basics and some specifics.

He had sent Maz a copy of their tickets, some additional information that she had asked for, along with the money she had told him to pay in advance and had gone to bed early.

When he got a call on Monday morning while in his office, he had frowned at the number.

“Ren.”

“Hello Ben!” Maz’s voice had purred and he rolled his eyes. “There are a few things I need to speak to you about, concerning the trip.”

What?

“I am busy.” He had grumbled, opening an email from one of the partners.

“Certainly. But you see, there are a few specifics I didn’t want to mention in front of Rey, given that this is her first time. It can be a bit overwhelming for the girls, you can imagine.”

He sighed.

“I’m not exactly underwhelmed myself.” He told her frankly. To his surprise, the woman laughed.

“That much was evident!”

A cute girl was a cute girl, no matter the circumstances. So what if he found her attractive? It wasn’t like the situation lent itself to sentimental notions. He paid her, for crying out loud!

“While your contract is upheld however, I do not allow any real intimacy!”

Kylo scoffed.

“What do you want? Tell me to always keep her an arm’s length away? Because that will make the act believable.” His voice dripped with sarcasm.

“Don’t be daft, boy! No, of course physical contact will be inevitable. But; I want you and her to agree on a list of things that are on the table. I’ll inform her that you’ll be in touch to talk about these things.”

What?

“I don’t have time for this! Just tell her to think about what she’ll be fine with and I’ll adapt to that.”

The way he saw it, this ball ought to be in Rey’s corner. He didn’t mind.

“That is very forthcoming and chivalric of you, but if you two are to act like a couple, you will have to work together. I have her on the other line and will put her on now.”

He was losing patience quickly.

“Maz, listen…” he heard himself snap, when a second voice could be heard.

“Hello?”

“Hello Rey, dear! I was just talking to Mr Ren about the list we talked about. Maybe the two of you could meet up later this week to talk it over?”

Clearing his throat, he gave Rey a moment to reply.

“Well, sure. I can make some time.”

“I appreciate the effort. But as I just told Miss Kanata, I’d be perfectly happy with you deciding on what you are comfortable with.” He tried very hard not to sound too agitated, though he hated having to repeat himself.

“Oh no, that’s fine Mr Ren, thank you though. Both of us ought to be comfortable!” Rey told him kindly. About to tell her about his own busy week, Maz jumped right in:

“That’s the spirit, Rey! And wouldn’t you know; there is a free spot in both your and Ben’s schedule on Thursday at 4 pm. You could meet for coffee.”

Was this Maz’s way of getting more money out of him?

God that sounded disgusting, but he could not help but wonder.

“Ahm… actually…” Rey’s voice sounded very small out of a sudden.

“A problem, dear?”  
The girl let out a sigh but continued in a slightly insecure voice.

“Not really… uhm… Mr Ren? Would you mind meeting me in the Alderaan Places? It is a coffeehouse in Brooklyn.”

He could have said no. Could have told them that this free period was reserved for his workout routine. Yet what came out was the assurance that he’d meet her there. Maz had been happy and a few days later he entered the rather large and expensive yet cosy looking coffeehouse, loosening the black scarf around his neck, scanning the tables for Rey. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a waitress approach him.

“Mr Ren!” a cheerful voice greeted him. “I hope you did find it alright?”

He turned his gaze and looked at Rey, who was wearing the same skirt and white dress shirt as the other waitresses.

“I did.” He pressed out, trying not to look baffled.

“Sorry we have to meet here. One of the girls got sick and… Well, Maz made it sound so important and I didn’t want to complicate things.” She explained. “Shall we sit? The manager told me we could have the office.”

He just nodded, feeling a bit dump, following her as she led him away from the buzz.

The office was small, packed with folder and paperwork, but kept in relative order. Rey offered him a seat in an old, well used chair. She was beginning to look nervous now that they were alone for the first time.

“Can I get you a coffee? We have good and fresh juice too. Or maybe a water?” she rambled without meeting his eye.

“Nothing, thank you.”

She looked at him for a moment, her eyes, her smile and her posture a bit tense.

“It’d be on the house… You’re overpaying as it is, so…” she attempted to joke but trailed off, blushing. Shifting in his seat, he shook his head.

“It is fine.” He reassured her. Rey nodded and moved to sit behind the table, paused, turned her head towards him, and moved the desk-chair around the desk, sitting a bit closer.

Both were eager not to look at one another for too long and neither spoke for a second.

“This is weird!” she said suddenly.

“I agree.” He sighed.

“Maybe it is good that we meet now though. I can’t fidget when around you if we’re supposed to be a couple.”

A small smile tugged at the corner of his full lips.

“You fidget a lot?”

“Only when nervous.” She admitted. “This is not exactly… I am a bit out of my depth here.”

He nodded in sympathy.

“Yeah, me too.”

She wasn’t wrong though. His back was straightened to the point of breaking, his shoulders tense and he suddenly realized that his hands were incredibly sweaty. Not something that’d go away during an 8 hour flight.

“So…” she broke off, biting her lip.

“Should we just start?” he asked, taking the initiative. The relieved sigh that left her, bringing a small smile to her face told him it had been the right thing to do.

“Let me get some paper… Maz said to write everything down.” She jumped up and got a white sheet out of the printer. Sitting back down, she smiled at him, handing him the paper and a pen.

“Anything you don’t feel comfortable with at all?” he asked, trying not to sound too stiff and failing miserably.

She took a moment to think this through.

“I don’t like it when people ruffle my hair.”

He grinned and wrote it down.

“That’s stupid, I know.” She said, blushing.

“No, no, it’s fine! I am not too fond of it myself.”

“No kissing on the mouth… Maybe on the cheek is okay?!” she asked cautiously. “I mean we will have to at some point, right?”

Thinking about it, he stared at the paper. It couldn’t be helped, he guessed.

“If you don’t mind? What about…” he gestured towards his forehead.

“Forehead kisses? Isn’t that a bit too… tender?”

“I just want to cover everything, I assure you. I only ask in case there’s occasion.”

She snorted.

“Why would you kiss me on the forehead?”

“You might do something cute.”

She giggled.

“Okay, if I do anything cutesy you have permission to kiss me on the forehead!” she told him warmly, grinning at him.

He’d be lying if he didn’t think of this as a proper moment for one such kiss. He resisted. While, yes she was adorable, she was also the girl he was paying to be with him. And this really didn’t make for a compelling background for sudden displays of… Did he honestly just consider kissing this girl?

_Get a grip, Kylo!_

“What about you?” Rey’s voice got him out of his thoughts.

They spend about an hour talking about what both of them thought acceptable in their unique situation (hugging, holding hands, a bit of cuddling when it was appropriate just to name a few) and what was too intimate (touching and caressing each other’s faces, kisses on the lips and touching in general when not fully dressed). All of it incredibly reasonable.

“Thank you, by the way…” she said when they were done. At his confused look she elaborated. “Maz had the first check delivered yesterday.”

“Oh, well… you’re welcome.” He cleared his throat. “Make sure to get some warm clothes. My mother already suggested you learn how to ski.”

Beaming at him, she moved a bit towards him.

“Could I?”

Blinking, he took her in.

“Well, you’ll need a teacher… I could show you if you really want to!”

This excited her and she clapped her hands together.

“Great! I already found some really nice stuff in my favourite thrift shop!”

“A thrift shop?” he wondered, sounding incredulous. Surely the money was sufficient to buy new clothes.

She shrugged.

“I’m a bit of a scavenger. People throw out perfectly good clothes every day. I don’t like waste.

Peculiar, but he wasn’t one to fault environmental thinking.

“Well, just make sure to bring enough. My parents might want to go out, so pack something for that occasion too, but we’ll mostly be in and around the house. Hiking boots might come in handy too.”

She nodded.

“That’s thoughtful, thanks for telling me, Mr Ren!” Rey said cheerfully.

“Something else… We probably ought to call each other by our first names… get used to that?”

“Oh…” she laughed. “Sure, didn’t think of that for a minute.”

She reached out her hand for him to shake.

“I am Rey!” she re-introduced herself.

Grinning, he reached out.

“Kylo.”

As their hands touched, warm from having been inside all day, a spark hit them. Once more, Rey giggled, rubbing her hand.

“Sorry. Those shirts always have me electrically charged.”

Biting down a cheesy compliment, he nodded.

“Well… I’ll see you in two weeks at the airport?”

“Yeah, see you then! I’ll make sure Maz gets this.” Rey said, holding up the paper.

“Thank you. Have a nice evening.”

“You too, Mr… I mean Kylo!”

He’d really rather not have registered how nice his name sounded when she spoke it. He was being unprofessional and had to get a serious grip on himself.

“Until then!”

And with that he had left without looking back.

 

* * *

 

When he had his last day at work, just before the trip, Snoke called him into his office and what happened there thoroughly ruined his mood. Kylo had been tense about the whole thing anyway. Meeting his parents, maybe his uncle Luke, pretending to be in a relationship and spying on his mother… this would not be easy! But Snoke’s latest request…

Shit, part of him hoped the plane would crash!


	5. Jingle almost all the way

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You people are killing me in the best way. Seriously, I am so motivated to work on this fic thanks to all your comments, the subscriptions, kudos... just... Thank you! I wasn't sure whether this story would be well-received or find an audience at all.

Chapter 5

 

“How do you know my schedule?” he snapped into the phone.

“Hello, young Solo!” Maz answered and he practically saw her arrogant smile in front of him, despite only talking to her on the phone.

“Quit it, Kanata! This is an invasion of privacy and I will not–“

Her voice was cold.

“No, my dear boy, an invasion of privacy would have been if I had gone along and just decided which girl you’d take on your trip. An invasion of privacy would have been me making sure that you actually had bought two seats. I understand this is upsetting, but I can’t help you quit that stupid job of yours.”

It had taken every ounce of self-control he possessed to not break his phone and wreck his apartment for good measure.

“But to answer your question; It is my job to know about these things now. I know that clients and escorts have an opening before they even know they need one. I get paid to take care of both of you, that’s why I take 30% and I am taking my job incredibly serious. Now, I am sorry if you feel like I crossed some kind of line here. But you might want to tell that boss of yours to stop snooping around your bank account and access the security cams of your building!”

He had yelled something. Kylo wasn’t quite sure what he had yelled, but when his sight cleared and he had calmed down enough to process her words, he was breathing heavily. And Maz was far from impressed with him.

“If you talk like this to Rey. Ben Solo, you listen to me and you listen well; If you so much as raise your voice, I’ll personally fly in and have you regret the day you were born. I will ruin you, I will ruin that disgusting beast you call a boss and I will love it. Understood?”

“Yes.” He snarled.

“Good! Now, do I have to worry about this? Because it is not too late to call the whole thing off and invite that wonderful young woman over to have Christmas dinner at my place instead.”

“No. It’s fine…”

“I hope so.”

This conversation wasn’t over, yet she terminated the call.

He only realized that he was crying when he looked around for his computer. Kylo had a few things he’d need someone to look into.

 

 

She did not travel often.  
Once, they had went to the coast upstate in summer for a short camping trip and she had of course left Nevada once she had scratched together enough money to get away from Unkar Plutt. Apart from that however, Rey was not used to just go away on vacation. So, when Paige had helped her with packing and Maz had made sure she had the prober papers, she was very grateful. With a certain shame she had been informed that Mr Ren –No, Kylo!– had bought her plane ticket.

“It is what he and I agreed on, child!” Maz had told her gently, letting her know that her second thoughts were entirely misplaced.

“But–“  
“This is how it is done. He’ll get to look at your pretty face for almost a whole week. Don’t feel bad. Now, finish packing.”

That had ended this conversation, but not the complexities of pre-travel. Her ears were still ringing with Paige’s laughter when the other girl had seen her rather torn up and stitched back together duffle bag. In no time a simple, but clean and rather large suitcase was placed onto her bed.  
“He is a lawyer! Do you think his mother will let him live it down if he doesn’t even make sure you have bags that don’t fall apart from so much as a stern look?” the older girl had joked.

Together they had repacked the suitcase, making sure that Rose and Finn didn’t see it. They would leave later that evening, taking the car to make their way up to Maine. It was a relief of sorts. That way Rey wouldn’t have to sneak out of the apartment with a large bag at 5 in the morning.

It was all rather exiting. Her new clothes were all washed, neatly folded, she had treated herself to some nice new make-up that Paige had recommended, the incredibly comfortable and warm boots she had gotten in a Christmas blowout sale had been the first thing she had put in the suitcase… only to have Paige get them out and put them on top.

Her alarms had been set for 4 in the morning, but she didn’t sleep much, her stomach doing topsy-turvies. She’d be on a plane, she’d spend Christmas with people she never met before, pretending to be in love with a man she met only a few times now. At some point she must’ve drifted off, because when she woke with a start a few minutes to 4, she vividly remembered a dream about Maz and Paige trying to fit themselves into her suitcase to make sure everything would go according to plan.

2 hours later she was at the airport, pulling her suitcase after her. The plane would not leave for another 3 hours and while Kylo had informed her that there was no need to be there this early, she revelled in the excitement around her. She got herself a bagel and a nice hot coffee and sat in one of the benches close to check-in, watching families, groups of friends, single-travellers and especially couples as they arrived, got into queues and went their way towards security.  
Some seemed calm and collected, other stressed out and already close to a mental break-down. For once, she had to force food down her throat, belonging to the group of nervous travellers. Flying on a plane was not a problem. The uncertainty of what was waiting for her however got to her. What if they wouldn’t get along? What if his family ended up looking through the act? What if they were not as nice as Maz had told her? She was worried. She might not be fit as an escort, might flinch away from intimacy and blow their cover.

Briefly, she wondered whether Kylo felt the same thing. Sure, he knew where he’d end up, but he was still part of an act.

Rey sighed.

It was too late for all of these thoughts now. And to be sure, she did enjoy the excitement to a certain degree. Yes, it was a bit scary. Yes, she had no way of knowing what would happen. But this, all of this was new and thrilling and she was willing to make the best out of it. Rey Doe was not one to shy away from a challenge and she had achieved much less likely victories in the past. Suddenly her bagel didn’t feel that dry, the coffee –though absolutely overpriced– tasted delicious.

With a soft smile she watched people arrive and leave again, off to their way for the Christmas holidays. She had packed her sketchbook as well as a few pencils and thought about getting them out to take a few quick sketches. For the moment however, she was happy to just be idle for once.

She could do this.

 

 

It was with this soft smile that Kylo found her. He felt like he was trespassing somehow, her almost serene expression clashing with his own tense face.  
The bad mood Snoke’s latest request had awoken in him had not lessened and he had barely slept last night, dark circles under his eyes.

Seeing him approach, she jumped to her feet, greeting him with a friendly smile and a cheerful “Good morning!”

He nodded in greeting.

“You weren’t waiting long I hope?” he forced himself to ask. It wasn’t her fault. None of this was her fault. Snoke, Snoke was asking this of him.  
“About an hour.” She told him and he frowned. “It was fine!” she was quick to say. “Couldn’t sleep anyway.”

As they went to their airline’s check-in counter, Rey made to stand in line, when he kept walking past it. A surprised “Where are we going?” did not slow him down, but he answered anyway.

“I didn’t pay for first class to wait in lines.”

She didn’t answer to that, his tone probably having been a bit too gruff. He knew this to be the case when she stood rather more stiffly than ever before next to him while they were getting their tickets. Damn!

“Would you care for the window seat?” he suddenly inquired, causing the woman behind the counter to look up and wait for Rey’s answer with a professionally patient smile. The girl perked up and nodded eagerly.

“Yes, please!”

Grinning slightly, he helped her with her luggage. When they arrived at the security check, Rey kept close to him, appearing nervous.

“Keep your passport and ticket close. You’ll need them a few times.” He informed her and once more she just nodded shyly. Once more, she looked puzzled without saying anything when they passed the next long line.

“Fast lane, Rey.” He explained without her having to ask.

“So that’s what the expression means…” she commented and for the first time he looked down at her while walking.

“Excuse me?”

“’Living life on the fast lane’?! Evidently, I never really got it.”

Kylo gave her a small grin, which she returned with a smile.

“You already had breakfast? We still have a bit of time before boarding.” He said while retying his shoes. Ridiculous security checks. Rey, who was slipping back into her coat, tilted her head.

“I could drink another coffee.” And after a short pause added. “I am a bit too nervous to eat now.”

As they went their way –he was in serious need for a muffin– she tugged at his sleeve.

“There are no fast lanes for coffee, too, right?”

He surprised himself by snorting.

“Better than that!”

 

 

Not a morning person then!  
When Kylo had approached her, she had been glad to see him. This meant that everything was going according to plan with no traffic or any other problems arising. He had been wearing a soft looking, black wool-coat along with black jeans, contrasting with his pale face. Poor him, he had looked tired.

His bad mood had been obvious, so she had kept quiet. He was going to cheer up, wasn’t he? He wasn’t already regretting this, was he?

It relieved her when he offered her the window seat. She had considered asking him whether it’d be okay with her to have it, but had thought it safer not to push for it when he had turned up with a face that had grumpy cat look cheerful.

The Sky Lounge they went to next made up for everything though. She even decided on ordering the delicious looking fruit salad she had seen a woman eating.

“’this your first time flying?” he asked after finishing his second cup of coffee.

“It is the first time flying like this! When I came over here from England it was far from being this comfortable!” she told him.

“How old were you?”

Oh sure, they had to talk specifics now in case it came up! She didn’t feel like sharing all of it with him, the details far too personal and… grimy.

“I was 12. Lived in an orphanage in London before that.” She said casually, suddenly adamant of studying her ticket.

“… You’re an orphan?”

This may have sounded silly, but she was glad that he sounded more flabbergasted than pitying. She hated pity, now that she no longer needed it! Rey had done well for herself.

“Well…” It was the easier answer, why explain the ugly truth?! “Yeah. That’s how I have time on Christmas.”

Silence followed and when she lifted her eyes, he was frowning slightly. Still, no pity, not really! If anything he seemed at a loss of what to say to that. It was nothing new. A lot of people were at a loss of what to say to that.

“What about your family? What’s to know?” she asked, wanting to change the topic. His dark brown eyes met hers for a second and he sighed. Funny enough, she wasn’t sure whether he was glad about the turn of topic.

“My mother used to be a diplomat. These days she’s very active in politics.” He explained. She registered that he was idly playing with the paper his muffin had been wrapped in.

“And your dad?”

Wrong question. Very, very wrong question and she knew it before he even opened his mouth.

“There’s no polite term for what he is.”

Oh-kay.

“I think we should agree on having been together for 4 months.” He told her, leaning back in his seat.

“Long enough not be tearing each other’s clothes off constantly.” She said, understanding.

“And not long enough for my mother to ask when she’ll get grandkids…” he mumbled. Rey grinned, remembering what Paige had told her. “I ought to apologize for everything in advance, I think.”

The young woman shook her head.

“The way I see it, you are overpaying me anyway. As long as your mother won’t hate me too much, I can take it.”

“Believe me, by the end of the holidays, you’ll regret not asking for more money!” he told her darkly. The man wasn’t joking about this. Yet Maz had said… “They’ll like you though, I think.”

She didn’t ask why that was. It seemed a far too touchy subject. Maybe he was too tired yet? The dark circles under his eyes indicated that he must’ve had just about as much sleep as she did and while she had the benefit of concealer to cover up the worst of it as well as excitement keeping her awake, he looked close to nodding off.

While she was dying to ask about his mother’s house, having mental images of a small but cosy cottage, she didn’t want to push him. She’d find out soon enough and if it turned out to just being a small house in town instead of a cute cottage with lights in the trees surrounding it while it started to be covered in snow… well, her expectations had the habit of running away with her.

“When is your birthday?” she asked out of the blue.

“9th of November.” He answered.

“What did we do for it?” she asked, leaning her weight onto her crossed arms on the table.

“Excuse m– Oh… yeah… We stayed in.”

“On your 30th birthday?” she doubted. “Not on my watch!”

“They won’t ask too many questions. Staying in comes with implications nobody wants to discuss… I hope.” He explained, a small blush bringing a little bit of colour to his face. And ears! Cute!, Rey caught herself thinking in delight.

“Maybe, but I would’ve taken you out. I’m a people person, I’d want you to relax on your birthday. Afterwards is enough time for…” and it was her turn to blush. “…physical presents.”

He sighed, seeming more tired by the second.

“So, what did we do?”

“We had dinner at the place we had our first date! I surprised you with that.” She thought for a moment.

“And why are there no pictures of that date?” he wondered.

“I hate selfies!”

“Oh good, so do I!” Kylo actually sounded relieved about this.

Shortly after their flight was ready for boarding and they made their way towards their gate.

 

 

Her excitement did wonders for his mood!

It wasn’t quite contagious, he was too used to flying, but he was able to concentrate on her instead of Snoke’s latest request of planting incriminating evidence on his mother’s computer in case he wasn’t able to find anything. Kylo still heard his voice, the old men’s conviction of her having done something illegal. His reasoning had been that there had to be something, but that Kylo might not be able to find it in time.

He didn’t want to do it. Even thinking about it had made him almost sick!

Rey took his mind off it. The way she took in their surroundings, her delight at something as ordinary as the slightly bigger seats in first class, her surprise at the flight attendant taking their coats and offering them a drink as soon as they had fastened their seatbelts. Her smile was bright, eyes sparkling with enthusiasm.

“Do you like it?” he asked with warmth in his voice that startled him.

Now that smile was directed at him and something inside of him came alive, tentative warmth spreading in his chest. Dismissing it as basic, physical attraction, he reasoned that finding a young woman like Rey to be pretty was only natural. Today she was wearing tight grey jeans and a soft looking white turtleneck sweater, along with a blue scarf. A casual look to be sure, but it displayed her long, nicely shaped legs.

Simple attraction would be fine!  
He did work with other beautiful women on a daily basis and nothing ever came from it. Not believing in mixing business with pleasure, Kylo once more reminded himself that this here was business, nothing more!

With his mood improved, he felt rather tired out of a sudden.

“May I ask when you saw your family last?” she asked him out of nowhere. They had just discussed when and where they had met as well as deciding on the specifics of their first date (13th of August, he took her to the Met which she had thought cliché, but sweet considering that he had no idea of art whatsoever and they had had dinner at a place called Porg’s afterwards).

“That would have been… 6 years ago.” He answered shortly, wondering what the purpose of her knowing this would be.

“Did something happen?” there was honest concern in her voice, like she was worried he had been hurt.

“I thought my family shouldn’t sabotage or dictate the way I decided to live my life. They thought otherwise.” He’d like to be done with this conversation and he knew that his voice indicated as much when she bit her lip. “My mother and uncle were not exactly happy about my choice of mentor. It will come up, just a fair warning.”

_And it won’t be nice!_

“But it was your mother who invited you, right?”

“Yes?!” he more asked than confirmed since he wondered where this was going.

However, she simply nodded to herself and stared right back out of the window to watch the grey clouds above them, leaning back in her seat. She was calming down slowly, now that they were seated.

Leaving her to her thoughts, he tried to relax as well, going through the next steps of their journey to keep his thoughts away from Snoke. They’d arrive in Aspen at around 3pm if all went according to plan. Then another hour and a half until they’d reach the house. They’d switch planes in Chicago.

These seats were comfortable, he realized out of a sudden, when his eyes began to get heavy. Maybe she’d be alright if he took a quick nap? They had enough time to plan their relationship later and he’d be much more capable to deal with his family after some rest.  
“Rey?! Would you mind–“ he broke off as he faced her. She had fallen asleep.

He took in her face for a moment. The young woman looked at peace, features relaxed and hands folded in her lap. He smiled despite himself.

“Miss?” he called for one of the flight attendants, who hurried over to him, a small smile on her face. “In case she wakes up, bring her whatever she likes.”

The woman nodded as if the prospect alone gave her joy.

“Should I get a blanket in case she gets cold?” she offered.

Kylo nodded.  
It wouldn’t do for Rey to wake up with a cold, would it? Maz would probably have his head for it! Having the blanket placed over her lap, he got comfortable as they took off. Once more, his gaze lingered on her sleeping face and the warm feeling returned. Turning his head away, he sighed, closing his eyes, willing it to fade.

 

His rest had been deep and when he was tentatively shaken awake by a small hand, he felt a lot better than before. Rey was calling his name and when his eyes opened, he realized that he must’ve turned his face towards her again while having been asleep. The blanket he had given her was now neatly placed over himself.

“Hey, sorry for waking you.” she greeted him with a soft smile.

“’s alright…” he opened his seatbelt and stretched in his seat, a few bones cracking as he did so. “What time is it?” he asked, fighting a yawn.

“Almost 11. We’ll land in Chicago soon.”

He had not meant to sleep this long! Excusing himself for a moment, he cursed the last sleepless night. They should have been having an important conversation!

When he came back, he apologized for having been out so long.

“You were tired.” She dismissed it kindly. “And I used the opportunity to create some credibility to out relationship.” She winked.

“How so?”

Sure, they were just acting, but he had wanted some say in his relationship! Even if it was all fake. He watched her as she leaned down to fish a black book out of her bag.

“It is true, I do hate selfies…” she explained while doing so. “I prefer sketching people. I hope you don’t mind.”

Handing the opened book over, he was met with several sketches of himself. He was sleeping in all of them, but some featured him with different stages of facial hair. Without thinking about it, his hand came up to stroke his shaved chin.

“I think it’d suit you.” She grinned when observing the action.

“These are… rather good!”

He allowed himself to turn a page.

“Very good actually.”

“You’re too kind.” She deflected the compliment.

“Nice thinking.” He commented as he turned the page to a sketch of what appeared to be different kinds of large crowds of people. “You do this a lot?” he answered as he came across a sketch of Paige, lounging on an old sofa in a pyjama.

She shrugged.

“Improvement comes with hard work and repetition.”

They agreed on that.

 

Switching planes worked just fine without any problems whatsoever and before they knew they were leaving Chicago on the next stage of their journey. Rey was telling him about her allergies and how a tragic peanut incident had inspired her best friend Finn to use it as her nickname.

It had him frown.  
“You didn’t have to go to hospital right?”

“Oh, no! I stopped myself just in time and accidently threw the noodles in his face when I whipped the fork away from my mouth.” She told him, grinning at the memory, gesturing wildly as the flight attendant approached them with two menus.

“Excuse the interruption, Sir. Would you like to choose your lunch from our menu?” she asked in a soft tone. He accepted, handing one over to Rey.

“We get to pick?” her excitement was back in full force.

He chuckled.

“Indeed we do.”

“By the way… nicknames… Do we have one for each other?” she muttered while scanning the meals they offered, eyes getting big as saucers.

“Pick whatever you like.” He told her when he saw her eyes sliding towards the prices nervously. It was painfully obvious when she did that. “Would you like to pick one for yourself?”

“We could also just count to three and just say whatever endearment comes to mind!”

“A bit childish isn’t it?” he sounded doubtful. To his surprise, he nodded.

“Live a little!”

He scoffed and was about to tell her that he really wasn’t the kind of guy to give his girlfriends nicknames or even use endearments. However, was it really worth it? This would just drive home how fake this whole relationship was and this stupid warm feeling would not show up again. He’d probably have to fight rolling his eyes every time she’d use ‘dear’ or ‘babe’.

“One…” he muttered and she beamed before chiming in. On three he said the first thing that came to his mind while looking at her.

“Sweetheart.”  
“Big Guy.”

While she smiled, telling him that she liked ‘Sweetheart’, while he paled as soon as it had left his lips.

Fuck!

 

 

The last two hours of their flight were calm. Rey worried that she had pushed it with the endearments and she was sorry. All she had wanted to do was continue to ease up the conversation. They had made honest progress, his mood much improved after his nap and she was beginning to understand the man sitting next to her.

His boss sounded like an utter and absolute cunt and control-freak (and Kylo being tragically oblivious of it), the relationship with his family strained from what sounded like some serious case of stubbornness and tragic misunderstandings and he enjoyed his job. It didn’t sound as if he always liked his clients, but his job he loved. He was still in touch with some people he had known in university, meeting one of them in the local gym twice a week.

All in all he sounded busy and a bit lonely, but not unhappy. She understood now why he had not known a woman who’d be fit to accompany him. There really was no space for someone serious in his life. Which was a bit of a waste, because she thought he’d be very good at being in a relationship if he’d just allow himself some more space. And maybe get away from that weird Snoke person.

Now however, he was immersed in whatever he had to finish before the holidays. She bit her lip. This was no good!

“Kylo?”

He made he sound in the back of his throat to assure her that he was listening.

“I am sorry if the idea was stupid and I brought it up… We don’t have to do the whole endearment thing if you don’t like it.” she said apologetically.

He turned his head towards her and closed the laptop, sighing.

“It’s not your fault, Rey. The idea was good, but… maybe we just do it when it feels right?” he offered to her great relief. “And also; dogs or cats?”

She let out a short, soft laugh.

“Both! You?”

“Dogs all the way.” He muttered, stretching his legs. “Ugh, can’t wait till we get out of here.”

She felt a lot better after this and when they finally arrived Aspen and started driving through this beautiful part of the country, Rey forgot all about any nervousness she had still felt this morning. There was snow everywhere, the mountains always visible and imposing. As they approached and drove through Aspen, all the lights that had been used as decoration for this time of the year delighted her. It was colder than in New York and she wished she had picked the other jacket she had packed for the flight, but it would be fine! Tomorrow she’d just have to dress in more layers.

“This is beautiful!” she breathed, a goofy smile making her face glow.

Kylo was silent and when she turned towards him, she realized that his fists were clenched, his expression dark. Was he nervous?

What was she thinking? Of course it was!

Turning away from the gorgeous nature around them as they were driven towards their destination, she reached her now gloved hand out towards his. He was now wearing black leather gloves that did not exactly look warm. His whole body jolted when her tiny hand closed around his large one.

“It’ll be okay.” She heard herself say. “If everything fails, I’ll tell the story of how I almost fed a fellow student’s piece to a goat at an art fair.”

She heard him take deep breaths, then, after a few moments he asked in a voice that was a bit shaky;

“Why would there be a goat at an art fair?”


	6. Oh, I could've very well waited a while longer to see those faces

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *cries*  
> Guys, you blew me away! I didn't get to answer all those nice comments yet, but every single one has made me so freaking happy. Same goes for those Kudos and Subscriptions and... Seriously, I don't know where this story would be now if it hadn't been for you.   
> You guys rock!!!!

Chapter 6

 

Rey had expected a cute house with maybe 3 bedrooms. Nothing too large, but comfortable and built to stay only a few days. As they had driven through town, she had been on the lookout. Which one might it be? Yet they drove by numerous absolutely beautiful buildings. All the while, her left hand remained clutched between Kylo’s. He was entirely unfazed by the Christmas lights and the nice houses.

The left town and the road began to be a bit narrower. It began to snow, adding to the white blanket covering their surroundings. Now, houses began to be further apart. And bigger!

“Is it a long way, still?” she inquired for the sake of keeping him away from his dark thoughts.

Kylo remained silent however, simply shaking his head. She allowed herself a soft smile and shook his hand a bit.

“It’ll be alright.” She assured.

His eyes turned towards her and those large eyes were full of concern and worry. The thought of a caged animal hit her.

She could not allow his anxiety to affect her, though. It was Rey’s job to make this easier for him –or so she had understood the little prep-talk Maz had given her– and she was determined not to be a waste of money.

“Need another art fair story? I still have a few.” She offered, then added; “Or would you rather I keep my mouth shut?”

At that he shook his head.

“No, no you’re helping.”

“I am?” this took her by surprise. In what kind of state would he be in if she hadn’t been here?

“I didn’t turn around and catch the next plane home yet, did I?” he asked dryly. At the inquiring look on her face, he leaned his head back. “I– Never mind. Just know you’re helping plenty.”

Something about his voice tugged at her, so, she did the thing that felt right. Scooping over, she pulled her hand out between his, and pulled him into a rather awkward hug. He was startled out of his current state.

“We’ll have to get used to it anyway. I’ve always been a hugger!” she mumbled, cheek pressed against his shoulder. When both of them shook from his soft laughter, her small victory had made her grin.

“Rey?” she heard him mumble when she had sat back. “Thank you… You are being a big help. May I ask you to… When I get too tense… Could you distract me? With another story maybe?”

This request filled her with purpose. She could do that. Easily.

A few minutes later they finally drove up a narrow, snow covered road and when the car stopped, surrounded by trees, the golden light of the house made up for the quickly vanishing daylight.

Rey’s jaw dropped and she was thankful for the few seconds she had to collect herself. Nothing had prepared her for this!

Two low trees on both sides of the large front door were covered with lights. The house itself –a tasteful mixture out of stone, wood and glass– was not a house at all, but to Rey looked more like a rustic palace.

“Are we staying at a hotel after all?” she heard herself ask.

“Hm? No… This is it.” he said casually, making to get out. Rey herself threw open the door and hopped out of the van, though she had seen him walk around in an attempt to help her. She just stared, while Kylo and the man who had driven them here unloaded their baggage.

It was beautiful! It did have a bit of the mountain cottage-look she had imagined, but it’s scale blew every kind of proportion she might’ve had in mind. The ground floor had a grey stonewall, whereas the two upper floors were covered with timber. In the centre of the building a gigantic window, which stretched over two floors had been placed. The room beyond that window promised warmth and comfort with it’s equally wooden panels and soft glow. She was busy couting the chimneys when movement caught her attention and guided it back to the large window. Rey could see a figure come to the gigantic window, only to rush out of sight again.

Realizing that her mouth was still open, she closed it quickly. Behind her, Kylo approached, her suitcase and his own in his hand.

“I can take it!” she offered, making to take hers off of him, but he turned his body away.

“It is fine. Would you grab mine and your bag though?”

Nodding, Rey was quick to shoulder both of their hand-luggage and was quick to follow him as the driver sped off into the cold, dark afternoon.

With a soft thunk, Kylo placed both of their suitcases on the ground and Rey felt her heart speed up. This was it. From now on, they had to pretend. She scanned the bellsign. There, written in bold letters stood 'Skywalker Lodge'. Rey frowned. He had told her his father's and mother's names, but the name Skywalker had never been used.

"Skywalker?"

"This property belonged to my mother's father, Anakin Skywalker." he told her in a strained voice.

 

* * *

 

 

He was about to throw up, he was sure of it.   
The urge to run away, storm after the car and never look back was almost irresistible. Yet, he felt too dizzy to run. He was sure he’d drop to the floor, his consciousness having failed him, if he so much as made a wrong move now.

In his chest, his heart was grinding through his rips, his stomach clenching and his throat was tight and dry.

_I can’t do this, I can’t…_

“Kylo?” once more Rey diverted his thoughts, just like she had done in the car. Had he been alone, he would’ve turned around, no doubt about that. But Rey had taken his mind off of the horrible situation he found himself in with silly stories about art fairs, eccentric fellow students and confused nude studies who had seated themselves in the wrong room. She had helped him. And now that they stood on his parent’s porch, shielded from the ever-falling snow but not from the cold, he registered two things: first, there was no going back and second, Rey was beginning to look rather cold.

With a heavy sigh he made to ring the door-bell, when the door flew open, warm air hitting him in the face and the sounds of soft Christmas tunes reached his ears. Not without a certain feeling of dread, his eyes settled on the tiny woman who had almost ripped the door out of it’s hinges.

Leia Organa had aged since the last time he saw her. Whether he’d think the effect that the past six years had had on her this obvious had they not fallen out, he couldn’t tell. But he remembered his mother with dark chestnut hair. Now there were strands of grey in the long tresses she had always prided herself on. Her features appeared to be softer than he remembered them.

Her eyes though…

“You’re here…” she breathed in awe and her lips quivered just for a moment before she caught herself and turned it into a smile.

“He– Happy Christmas, mother.” He croaked and suddenly felt incomprehensibly confused about the urge to lean down and hug her.

 

* * *

 

 

The young woman next to Kylo took the scene in with apprehension being replaced by a small smile. His mother had not been what she had expected! This tiny woman in a lovely purple sweater and beautiful, warm eyes appeared to be beside herself with relief that Kylo had come here. He looked and sounded tense, but also lost for what to do next. Adjusting his bag on her shoulder, his mother’s eyes fell on her. To her, she had been invisible. That was alright with her.

“Oh, you two must be freezing. Come in, come in.” she stepped aside and tentatively placed a hand on Kylo’s upper arm to usher him in. Or was it to assure herself that he was really, actually without doubt there?

Turning towards her, Rey received a gentle smile in greeting.

“You must be Rey.”

Nodding, Rey beamed at her and reached out her hand.

“Yes. Thank you so much for– oh…”

The offered hand had either gone unnoticed or had been thoroughly ignored, because instead of a handshake, she was pulled into a warm hug. Unable not to grin, she responded and when they separated, Rey chanced a look at Kylo, who cleared his throat, startling his mother, who looked panicked for a moment.

“I am so sorry… Rey, I apologize if this was too…”

Touching the older woman’s shoulder Rey shook her head.

“I’m a big hugger myself.” Then with a nod at Kylo she added. “He just knows that I can be shy or overwhelmed sometimes and worries too much.”

The pride in Leia’s eyes was unmistakable.

“He always did.” She told the girl in a friendly, very mother-like tone. “But you must be tired from your flight. Since when have you been up, Ben… Kylo?”

_Ben?_

He answered her questions cordially and politely. He had left the apartment at 7. Everything had worked just fine, no delays or problems with the baggage, food had been fine –an understatement because the food had been fantastic.

“Would you two like to eat something? We already had lunch, but…” here she looked almost shyly up at her son. “…I made sure to get the traditional German gingerbread you always liked so much.”

One thing had been very clear from the beginning.

This man was horrible at poker. Every tiny emotion was displayed on his face. So, Rey was very certain that this ‘traditional German gingerbread’ was something he was incredibly excited about, which took him by surprise, which he attempted to cover up behind a stern mask.

“Maybe later…”

“You never told me you liked gingerbread that much!” Rey interrupted gingerly nudging him with her shoulder.

“It isn’t like the one we get over here… it’s… different… better.” He mumbled, blushing, then swallowed. “Maybe we could unpack first. Or are you hungry?”

This was directed at her, but she shook her head. She could always eat. But for now it seemed like a good idea for him to take a deep breath.

“Sure, sure!” Leia said, jumping into action. “Do you need help with those, dear?” she asked pointing at the suitcases.

“I’m good.” He mumbled tonelessly and they followed her up a flight of wooden stairs. Now that the initial anxiety Rey had felt was waning, she had time to take a look around. The house was furnished in a mix of modern and classic furniture, but lacked the clichéd hunter’s lodge flair she had seen in some magazines. No tacky deer antlers, no fur carpets or anything that indicated hunting being a hobby. Kylo’s mother seemed an enthusiast of Christmas decorations, judging from pine branches decorated with fairy lights, red ribbons and ornaments in every room. Fluffly looking carpets covered the wooden floors, while heavy curtains flanked the windows.

“Your father is still out, getting the fire started… barbeque in the middle of winter or something equally ridiculous.” Leia chatted. “But you know him. He read about it on some blog and was determined to try.”

“I am not surprised…” came the dry reply.

“Actually…” Rey blushed. “My friends and I did it on campus last year. It was nice.”

The soft, small hand on her back startled her a bit.

“Yes, dear, but you and your friends are young. He hasn’t been for many years.”

“And loves to ignore it…” Kylo growled, making Leia give him a disapproving look, but elected to say nothing. Rey, eager to change the subject, took in her surroundings once more.

“This house is breath-taking, Mrs Organa.”

“That's nice of you to say, dear, but do call me Leia.” They were walking up a flight of steps towards the next floor when they heard a curse behind them.

“Shit!”

Both women were startled by Kylo’s sudden outburst. He looked up at his mother, suitcases still in hand.

“Mother, I forgot to call and tell you… I still have lots of work which I will have to finish while we’re here. I’d hate to disturb Rey while working. We decided to sleep separately.”

Oh, this! Well, he really should have called her beforehand so they wouldn’t cause any inconvenience. Men! The changed look on Leia’s face halted Rey’s lamentation about his lack of foresight. For the first time the older woman seemed… displeased. The corners of her mouth were pulled into a grimace and her eyes narrowed ever so slightly.

“It is Christmas, Ben!” she said sternly. “A national holiday. I trust your employer knows what that entails or is he in need of a dictionary?”

Nobody said a word for several moments. Both just stared at each other, neither of them too happy about the things the other had said, but equally unwilling to already yell at one another.

“I wouldn’t have to if I hadn’t just wasted a good day’s work on a plane.” He hissed at her and Rey blanched. Next to her, Leia looked like he had just hit her, wrecking her head for words.

“Kylo…” she made to pacify, but was interrupted by another voice, calling for Leia. At her answer, a tall man with greying brown scruffy-looking hair in a heavy winter’s coat came into sight, leaning onto the bannister over them.

“Ah, hey Kid!” he greeted with a slight smirk. “Looking good. Got here okay?”

“Fine.” Kylo ground out and if his tone startled or bothered the man who probably was his father, he didn’t show it.

“Good, good. Hello!” he greeted Rey, who nodded with a nervous smile.

“Leia, I– What’s with that face?” he inquired. “What did I do?”

Rey fought a laugh, simply because everyone around her was still very tense.

“Your son just informed me that he’ll have to work during the holidays.”

“That sentence doesn’t even make sense!” Han said, rolling his eyes and turning away, now out of sight.

Before anyone could say anything to make the situation worse, Rey interrupted.

“It is my fault. I have exams and project deadlines coming up. Sadly, my professors don’t care too much about Christmas.”

Leia sighed.

“I understand _that_ , Rey.” She told her, with a stern look at Kylo before turning around to keep walking.

“It’ll just be tomorrow, mother. Nothing big, just finishing touches and then I’ll be ready.” he consented, earning a very proud look from Rey.

Leia sighed, but kept walking.

The additional noise as they got up told Rey that Han had decided to follow them and sure enough, when she glanced over her shoulder once more, she saw the older man, now sans-jacket getting up the stairs behind Kylo.

“When your mother got you to agree, she had your old room re-done. House was full with workers.”

Judging from Mr Solo’s voice, this had been his personal nightmare.

“You didn’t have to.” Kylo called, but his mother only shrugged.

The room had it’s own fireplace! Lucky him. There was a large bed, another very soft looking carpet and some chairs along with a trunk by the window. A glass door that appeared to open onto a balcony was of special interest to Rey. She had always liked the idea of having a balcony attached to her bedroom. Rey placed his bag on the floor next to the door.

“Do you like it?” Leia’s voice inquired.

The tall man, still letting his eyes linger on certain parts of the room took his time before he turned towards his mother.

“It is nice.” He smiled at her. It was short-lived and small, but it appeared to mean the world to his mother, who might just have grown four inches. “Now about Rey’s room…”

“I am so sorry, honey, but sadly I cannot offer her her own room. Your uncle Luke and Chewy with his wife are here too and Lando also came. The house is rather packed.”

His face fell and she felt herself blush.

“Lucky you, eh? Can’t imagine anyone minding to sharing a room with you. Han Solo!” the older man introduced, but seemed happy with just shaking hands.

“Rey Doe, hi, nice to meet you.”

“We’re glad to have you. Now, Rey: Will you be able to endure my son’s snoring for a couple of days?” he asked, mischievous glint in his eye and leaning a bit closer to her in a conspiratorial way. “Or are the two of you worried we might listen on the door? In which case I can assure you that…”

“THANKS, DAD!” Kylo snapped, flustered and Leia, while looking decidedly more amused than her son, admonished –while chuckling:

“That’s enough, Han.”

Shortly after, they were left alone.

And Kylo did not look happy. Without looking at her, he sighed, then combed his hair back with his fingers.

“Sorry about that…” he breathed, falling into one of the armchairs by the window.

“I could just sleep on the couch. It’s no trouble!” she offered quickly.

Kylo shook his head.

“I will sleep on the couch. I can pretend that I just fell asleep there while working. It is fine with me.” He decided, getting up. “I’ll go take a shower if you don’t mind. Feel free to unpack.”

 

* * *

 

 

He didn’t take a shower! All he needed was a moment alone. She would’ve left him if he had asked for it, he was certain, but he’d have felt miserable about that when she had tried to help him out during their short way here.

During the next few days she’d have plenty of opportunity to improve her technique, to be sure.   
This sucked! Barely five minutes in the house and they had already clashed. This was why it was impossible for him to do these things. He’d like things to be different, he really did! Who didn’t want a family they got along with? But alas, it had not been in the stars for him and he got stuck with a man who might just as well have been an absent uncle and a mother who loved her career more than him.

Kylo Ren had no illusions as to why Leia Organa couldn’t stand Snoke and it had nothing to do with the fact that her son had decided to work for the man. He was convinced of this. No, Snoke would have been in her way and she couldn’t stand that. This had been what Snoke had told him, what research had proven.   
So why had she looked so incredibly happy to see him?

Closing his eyes, he sighed, fingers clutching handfuls of his dark hair.

_It’s only for a few days… Only for a few days…_

When he stepped out of the bathroom a few minutes later, feeling a lot better, Rey was still gazing out of the window. She turned around, startled for a moment due to his dry and still dressed as before state, but said nothing.

 _Clever little thing_ , he thought fondly before he could stop himself.

“Enjoying the view?” he asked, walking over towards her, hands in the back-pockets of his black jeans.

“I know you have mixed feelings, but… the view, this room…”

“You’re not about to tell me that it is as big as your whole apartment are you?” he interrupted, one black brow arched.

Rey gave him a stern look.

“I live with three other girls!” she argued, then grinned. “But this is mine and Paige’s rooms put together.

Her grin was a challenge to make fun of her living arrangements. Sadly, he was in no mood for any banter. He had more money than her and both of them knew that. At the moment he saw no fun in pretending it to be otherwise or rubbing her nose in it.

“We could switch, you know?” she said while he was unpacking his clothes, mustering her own selection of clothes, which had already been placed in the walk-in.

“Switch what?” he called.

“You take the couch one night, me the next!”

A good compromise, but then again;

“If my mother finds you on the couch, I’ll never hear the end of it.”

She stuck her head through the door.

“Maybe so. But I get the feeling that I may never hear the end of it if your back starts killing you!” she quipped and he gave her a doubtful glance.

“We’ll get there when we get there.”

Did she just roll her eyes at him?

Well at least someone wasn’t jittery around him in this house.

“Can I say something?” he heard her call while she was changing in the walk-in. He hummed his consent as he waited for her. “You should be nicer to your mother.”

Ugh.

“Thanks for the input.”

“I know, sorry! But she seems to try really hard to make this whole experience as nice as possible.” She argued, not in the least perturbed by his obvious dislike of the topic.

“I might if she stopped making things weird. What did she have to hug you for? Or attack my boss?” he argued in ill humour.

A dramatic sigh escaped the other room only seconds before she did, wearing black leggings along with a shirtdress. Her hair was now down and fell onto her shoulders in soft waves.

“You look pretty.” He complimented and while she smiled, she made a dismissive gesture with her right hand.

“Don’t try to sidetrack! Think of it this way; If you don’t fight, the whole thing will be more pleasant and once something is pleasant it is over quickly.” She explained. “I didn’t mind the hug. Remember, I am supposed to be someone who matters to you. So she’s really making an effort to make your girlfriend feel at home!”

“Getting you onto her side more like…” he grumbled. She laughed. “Don’t make fun of me!”

Rey sighed.

“Kylo… what does it matter? Our relationship pretty much ensures that I’ll be on your side. However, you told me to act once you’re becoming too tense, so I am.”

He mulled over her words. She wasn’t wrong. The less trouble there was, the less problems he’d have. And he supposed that under different circumstances he would have been happy for a parent to welcome his significant other into their home like Leia had with Rey.

“You’re right… Ready for round 2?” he asked, though there was no joy in it.

She however nodded her head.

“That’s the spirit!”

He damn sure hoped it was!

 

* * *

 

 

Her hands were shaking while water poured into the can.

_He is home! He is here!_

Brushing away a few tears, Leia Organa continued to make coffee. Her son had grown into such a handsome young man. Ben had always been tall, but in his youth, he had been all long limbs and bones. Now however…  
She shuddered while thinking that this was due to Snoke’s influence. It was by his hand that her son had become this dark clothed giant with a detached look and pale features. With the gaze only a mother had she had immediately known that he worked too hard, allowed himself too little enjoyment.   
But no, she would not dwell on that now! He was here! Ben had come home for Christmas. This was what she’d concentrate on. Since a very, very long time, they’d all be together again.

Two arms snaked around her middle and a chin now rested on top of her head.

“Shit, he grew up, huh?” Han commented, his thoughts weirdly matching hers. “Barely recognized him. Has my family’s good hair though!”

Leia laughed.

Ben, especially during the very awkward stages of adolescence had always taken care of his hair. It had been the one thing about himself he had liked, she often mused. And her boy did have beautiful hair. And kind eyes. And a sweet smile. She hoped she’d see glimpses of them too, not just evidence that he still had a strict hair-routine.

“Dream on. That’s Skywalker hair.” She teased her husband, how chuckled.

“What’s the first impression on the girl, princess?”

“I like her. She seems sweet.” Leia said honestly. “A bit young maybe, but who are we to judge?”

Han nodded.

“Good. Because I for one am glad that she’s not some… trophy wife Barbie.”

She’d have lied if she hadn’t feared the worst, too! While she had not told Han about it, she had feared that Snoke would’ve found Ben a girl deemed proper. One who’d bind him to that disgusting monster and his wretched businesses. She needed to get her son out of that man’s circle before it was too late!

“I’m just glad he’s home.” Leia said softly.

A kiss was pressed on the top of her head.

“So am I princess. I missed that stubborn little pout of his…” Han slipped up. He barely voiced how much he missed Ben. Like he hadn’t made a hundred plans over the years to go to New York and make his son listen to the truth. Leia knew all this. And she knew how happy Han had been when Ben had accepted the invitation this year. Believing in the whole macho-myth he did the most Han Solo thing imaginable after slipping up and accidently showcasing his true feelings. He changed the subject. “Maz called me, by the way. Told me to wish you a happy Christmas.”

“How is she? Real Estate doing well?” Leia asked, cutting up some gingerbread for the kids. Kids. He was 30 now!

“Incredibly well, according to her. Apparently she just rented a lovely item to some idiot who really needed the change. She told me she thought of you while examining it and wants to have tea next time you’re in town.”


	7. Wreck the Halls With Bouts of Fury

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *faints* It's done!  
> Guys, once more my warmest thanks goes out to you. Your comments, subscriptions, bookmarks and kudos really astound me and I just... have no words :) Without you this story would not be where it is today. 
> 
> Thank you so very, very much!

Chapter 7

 

On their way back down, Rey took the time to appreciate their surroundings, inside and outside the house. The large windows they passed allowed a free view of the area around the house and though it was dark, the fact that she could not see any other lights from other estates gave her the sense of truly being in a secluded part of wilderness.

This should probably have filled her with a sense of unease. A house full of strangers and those strangers didn’t even get along particularly well, despite obviously putting every imaginable effort into it.

Kylo was the only one being a bit too grumpy, but she hoped that her little pep-talk had eased his mood towards his parents a bit. Not knowing what it felt like to have parents to criticise her boss for making her work too hard and too long, she felt conflicted about his rather violent reaction. His mother obviously cared about him enough to not want work taint his Christmas for him.

However, she had held her peace. He paid her to be pleasant company, not to chastise him for rudeness. They walked through the living-room to get to the kitchen on the ground-floor where Kylo suspected his mother to be at the moment. What Rey saw, standing a bit off from the large fireplace stopped her from following.

The world ceased moving for a second.

 

* * *

 

He had asked her a question and when he didn’t get an answer or even a reaction, Kylo turned his head, only to see that Rey was standing in the middle of the living-room, staring in awe at something. Following her line of sight, his eyes fell on a large fir tree that was yet to be decorated. Its fresh smell had filled the room by now and he pushed aside the memories of past Christmases when he had still been a boy and his uncle, Han and Chewie had him choose the trees for their celebrations. He had always picked the largest and his mother had kissed his forehead fondly, telling him that no one could pick a tree as well as him. Uncle Chewie had always lifted him on his shoulders in order to place decorations high up the tree. For the top they had needed a ladder…

With frustration, which stemmed from nervousness, he shook himself out of those thoughts.

“Everything alright, Rey?” he asked, adverting his gaze from the tree.

“It’s beautiful…” she breathed as if there were anything special about it.

It was a nice tree, he’d allow that! Tall, green and proud it stood there, waiting to be adorned with all sorts of lights and other decorations. They had used real candles one Christmas, he remembered. He also remembered the smell of burnt fir when it almost burnt down because Kylo and his father had been roughhousing. Afterwards his mother had insisted on electric lights.

Stop it!, he snarled at himself.

“Big rooms need big trees.” He shrugged, pretending not to be very occupied with his own thoughts and memories.

She nodded, those large eyes glued to the thing that had him recall memories he’d thought to have locked away years ago.

“Do you like it?”

Startled by his mother’s sudden appearance, he turned away from the girl. The tiny woman carried a tray with two plates on it, as well as the coffee set he remembered. His mother’s eyes lingered on Rey for just a moment longer, a gentle smile on her lips, before she blinked and smiled at her son.

“I made coffee and cut up some gingerbread.” She told him. “I wasn’t sure whether you two would be coming down or would prefer some peace and quiet.”

Well, he knew that he would have! Alas…

“Thank you, mother. We were just coming down.”

Finally snapping out of her stupor, he heard Rey hurry to his side, eager to relieve the older woman of the tray.

“Oh thank you, dear. If you two want…” she was forcing herself to say it. He heard it in her tone and for some twisted reason he dared not consider, his stomach dropped. “You can eat it in your room.”

Rey, now holding the tray, looked up at him with beautiful eyes that were pleading with him. Well, he did promise to try, didn’t he? Sort of…

“I think we’ll stay down here.” He told his mother, whose apprehension melted from her and was replaced by joy. Unable to look at her for too long, his gaze fell on the two cups on the tray.

“Will you join us?” Rey inquired in a shy, yet friendly voice.

“I’ll go get my cup.”

 

* * *

 

 

It was a mug he had bought for her for Mother’s Day a few years back. The blue cup with flowers on it had been filled with chocolates. The past was back to haunt him, he mused while his mother took a long sip from it.

They made pleasant small talk. He inquired as to why Chewbacca’s son wasn’t here, made comments that were kept polite, yet a bit impersonal and listened to his mother’s plans for Christmas dinner. All in all, it went rather well.  
Rey was pretty much silent, busy with looking around after they had sat down on the couch facing the fireplace. The young woman, he concluded, was memorizing every tiny detail, those large eyes sliding from corner to corner, in utter awe of her surroundings.

His mother’s turning towards her, that same soft smile on her face as before, proved to him that he hadn’t been the only one to notice.

“We’ll decorate the tree in a bit. I am afraid we are a bit late this year.”

Rey’s eyes met his, shyly, almost coyly.

“Can we help?” she asked softly, looking both hopeful and very afraid of him saying no. He’d have to be aware of not looking at her too closely again when she had that expression, for he knew he would have felt like a monster for denying her anything. He saw no need in assisting; knowing that there would be too much of a hassle around the tree as soon as his mother assembled all the different boxes filled with ornaments, tinsel and the likes. For one careless moment he wondered whether those boxes still magically seemed to double each year.

“If you’d like to!” he told her, smiling at her reaction, bouncing on the couch once, like an excited child being told that they could open one gift early. His mother too, shared her delight, clapping her hands once.

“That should be fun!” she commented and got up. “I’ll be back in a second.”

“Do you need help with anything?” Rey inquired, ready to be of use and half on her feet already, but was told to sit down, relax and not to worry.

When Leia had left, they were silent.

She was taken in by the room and he felt no reason to disturb her. An exited little blush coloured her cheeks and she rubbed her hands, only to hug herself after a second, throwing him an embarrassed look. It startled him, her joy over something as insignificant as a Christmas tree.

“Do you think…” she asked after a while. “Do you think it’d be okay to ask for the fireplace to be lit?”

Again, that timid look, like she was asking for some treat that she knew was forbidden to take, fearing repercussions for voicing such a small wish.

“Are you cold?” he inquired. Kylo thought the room to be rather warm, but then again, Rey was such a tiny creature who probably got cold easily.

“No!” she replied, her blush deepening. “It is just… I thought it might be pretty. But you’re right. I am warm enough. We don’t have to!”  

Now he was confused.

Where she had been eager to have it lit a second ago was now an equally strong alacrity to convince him that no fire would be needed. Yet, she had started to nervously tug at her clothing, the spark in her eyes vanished, replaced by something he really didn’t like.

“It… would be okay to lit a fire. That’s what we have the fireplace for.” He told her, not sure of what to say instead.

The light in her eyes returned, the tugging ceased.

“I could get the wood! I saw where it is stored when we arrived!” she offered readily, once more on her feet before he could utter any reply.

Kylo stood up, holding her back by her shoulder as she made to rush past him.

“It is fine Rey, I’ll go get it. You stay put.”

At her worried gaze, he thoughtlessly began to brush his thumb over her shoulder in an attempt to calm her. “It’s fine.” He reassured her without knowing or understanding why she was so wound up, only that he’d rather have her gaze at the room again in wonder. While he understood neither of her reactions, he preferred the happy glow on her cheeks and the slight smile she had on her face to the nervous expression she had had moments before.

A bit of it probably had everything to do with the probability of Maz hearing about her being on edge around him. That woman was scary!

When she relaxed her shoulder under his careful grasp and nodded, he gave her a small grin when she sat down once more.

 

* * *

 

 

It was cold outside and he really should have elected to put his jacket on, despite the short walk towards the place where wood had been stacked up. It had stopped snowing by now and it was completely dark. When his arm was almost full of wood, he heard someone approach him from behind.

“Ben…” he halted in his movements, unable to move suddenly. An angry ringing started in his ears and he saw red. “It is so good of you to come here. Means the world to your mother…”

That voice had heat running through him even though they were in sub-zero weather. With a glare and searing hatred in his eyes he turned towards Luke Skywalker.

 

* * *

 

 

Rey had gotten up from the couch after she had finished her gingerbread. Kylo had been correct, it was better than the American variation.

Seating herself in front of the fireplace, she tried not to squeal in excitement. A real fire in a fireplace in a room such as this. She was sure it’d be beautiful and add to the festive spirit that this house had put her in. Once more, her eyes wandered towards the yet naked tree, unable to divert herself too long from it.

In their apartment they didn’t even put up a tree this year. The year before that it had been an artificial, pretty small tree that no one really felt like getting out of their cellar unit. Rey hadn’t insisted either. She’d have been alone this Christmas and the tree would have been a constant reminder of that. But this one…

“Oh, you’re all alone?” Leia’s voice interrupted her thoughts and she turned towards the older woman.

“Kylo is getting some wood for the fireplace… that’s okay, isn’t it?” she quickly added, ready to jump up and rush after the tall man to inform him to leave it be in case his mother would look unhappy about the idea. No need for that though.

“Of course it is, dear.” Leia said, walking towards Rey. “If you’re cold, we can have a fire in your room as well. It can get chilly in the mountains.”

Rey was quick to shake her head.

“No, I just… I never saw a real fireplace, you see?!” the heat in her cheeks from before was back. “I just thought it would be nice.”

Just then, steps were heard rushing up the stairs and Kylo came into view, cold, glaring and angry as hell. Dumping the wood in his arm unceremoniously onto the ground and kept walking up the stairs like someone was after him, not even heeding his mother’s inquiry what had happened. Staring after him, both Rey and Leia flinched as he slammed the door.

Both women stared at one another for a moment, when the door downstairs was closed and more steps were heard. Slower, calmer and somehow softer ones than the ones preceding them. A man Rey hadn’t met before came into view, his grey beard doing nothing to hide his expression, more firewood in his arm.

“Luke?! What happened?” Leia asked, sounding worried.

“Our reunion went about as well as could be expected…” the man said in a sad tone of voice. When his gaze fell on her, he tilted his head. “You must be the girlfriend Leia mentioned.”

 

* * *

 

Throwing his suitcase onto the bed, he stormed into the closet.

He couldn’t do this!

Seeing his mother and father hadn’t been as bad as he had thought. Confusing, but manageable. It had even made him kind of happy to see his mother be happy to see him for a change.

But his uncle! Acting casual as if he hadn’t…

Throwing some of his clothes into the suitcase, he fished his phone out of his pocket to see whether he could get them an early flight back. If they had to, he’d book some hotel for the night. Kylo was frantic to get out of the house, no matter what.

Then he realized the message. Apparently he had a voicemail. From Snoke.

 

_“My boy, I only called to inquire whether things are going as planned. You will let me know about any and every progress you’re making. Also; I reassigned the case you were going to work on over the holidays to Hux and he came to a favourable conclusion. He is becoming more and more valuable to the agency, don’t you think? But of course, your unique position to prove your loyalty and efficiency if you succeed will always outweigh his wit and ambition. I am sure you will see a bit of friendly competition as a challenge, or else I am afraid you will be outranked rather soon.”_

 

As hot as he had felt after seeing Luke, now he was cold. Hux! He was threatening his position and Snoke had just indicated that his success in this was quintessential to remain where he was.

And with a crushing realization he slumped into the chair by the window. He was trapped and not going anywhere.

 

When he had calmed down more than an hour later, he got up and began to unpack again. He had to. Kylo had worked to hard to get to the where he was today, had sacrificed time, people and effort, believing in his way. Sentiment couldn’t sabotage him. Not now!

Yet, he was nervous. Without a doubt, they’d all be down there. Indeed he heard many voices, talking excitedly through the closed door. He heard footsteps approaching as he walked back out of the closet. A timid knock on the door and seconds later Rey was before him, having let the door open. He could hear voices from downstairs filtering through and the urge to slam it shut was almost irresistible.

“Are you alright?” she asked, face unsmiling.

He shrugged.

“We almost finished the tree… I thought we could put on the fire once it is done. Your mother left it to me.”

At this he nodded.

“Would you like to have a look?”

“At what?” he asked, sounding tired.

“The tree? It is really pretty. Your mother has a lot of ornaments and I think we used all of them…”

He sighed.

“I don’t know whether you noticed while gawking at the tree, but seeing my family isn’t exactly easy for me.” He growled, shaking his head.

At that, she frowned, displeased with his words.

Shit.

“I know.” Her voice didn’t sound timid anymore.

“Just… go downstairs. Enjoy your fire and the tree. Burn the damn tree if it tickles your fancy, I couldn’t care less.”

His anger was getting the better of him. Placing his elbows on his knees, he leaned forward, hands clutching at the hair of the nape of his neck so he didn’t have to look at her or at anything but the carpet for a moment. The whole situation was messed up and he was utterly caught in it. He hated that!

Silence, then footsteps.

Great, now he had scared her off too.

The door was closed but instead of steps getting softer, he heard them approaching him again. Knees came into his line of sight as she knelt down between his spread legs.

“I see that this is hard for you.” She said, her voice a bit softer once more, but still on edge of… ill temper. “But you told me to take care of you when you became too tense. For the time being, I am your girlfriend and as that, I can’t go back down there without having helped you calm down.”

He scoffed, looking at her.

“You already told me the goat story.” He reminded Rey.

“Yeah, but not the one with the scooter.”

He chuckled despite his bad mood.

“It is a good one, too!” she promised and he felt a soft tug at his sleeve. “Please come back down again?”

That pleading look again! It did something to him, causing something inside of him to be light and heavy at the same time. Abandoning the notion of refusing her, he sighed and got to his feet. In a swift motion she as good as jumped onto her own feet, grinning up at him and took his hand in hers.

“Don’t worry, I’ll protect you!” she joked.

“You better…” he muttered, causing her to laugh slightly.

 

* * *

 

Leia had warned Rey, told her that it would be wisest to let him steam. After an hour she had had enough though and when she finally succeeded to drag him down, she felt pretty happy with herself.

“Ben!” Chewbacca’s voice thundered through the whole house as they appeared on top of the stairs. Rey had liked the tall man with a long, curly beard and the heaviest accent she had ever heard. His wife, a very sweet brunette and he were cuddling on one of the couches, the man raising his cup of hot chocolate. “Han, he is too handsome to be yours.”

“Yeah, well, then we at least know he can’t be yours either, floofball!” came the answer, followed by laughter between the two men.

Rey once more wondered why everyone called him Ben and made a mental note to ask him later.

“’rry Christmas, m’boy!” Chewie cheered once he had stopped laughing, untangling himself from his wife, who happily waved at Kylo. Rey had considered the man to be even taller than Kylo, but seeing someone like him being towered over was surreal. The taller of the two demanded a hug and then, without waiting for an answer, wrapped the younger man into his big arms. “’s good to see the city didn’t swallow you, kiddo!”

“Merry Christmas…” Kylo replied, looking incredibly dishevelled. Rey was amused.

 

* * *

 

 

“Look what Rey and me did, dear!” his mother called for him, standing by the tree, relief at his reappearance evident. His father stood next to her, an arm casually thrown around her shoulders. Should he do the same to Rey? Would it be alright?

His uncle, who had been sitting next to Chewie and his wife kept his distance and said nothing. For now. He knew that nobody could shut Luke Skywalker up for long when there was something he felt the need to say.

Concentrating on his mother, he walked towards her and his father to have a good look at the tree. Rey had not exaggerated. They had packed the damn thing with decorations, ornaments, ribbons and… feathers?

It worked. Somehow, though he had no idea why.

“Rey suggested we use the feathers. I rather like it!” Leia told him, giving the girl who had positioned herself next to him a bright smile. The girl, embarrassed, suddenly found her feet incredibly interesting.

“It is… different.” He commented, taking his time to take the tree in.

“Good different?” Rey demanded, but something in his voice must’ve worried her. What possessed him, he didn’t know. But there had been such insecurity in her eyes, that he didn’t question his instinct. She had looked incredibly young; a fragile thing to be broken easily and he found himself incapable of not placing an arm around her shoulders, leaning down.

 

* * *

 

 

“Perfect different.” He breathed into her ear, his voice soft and kind and warm and deep and everything good. Then she felt the gentle touch of his lips against her temple. It felt… nice! So nice that she closed her eyes and leaned her head slightly to the side, into the little kiss he gave her. Only to remember why he was doing this. They were acting! Right! She quickly placed her hand on the one resting on her shoulder.

“Thank you, big guy!” she told him, blushing and smiling and being ridiculously wound up by this simple gesture.

When Han told them to get a room, she laughed, trying not to think about the feeling of his lips against her skin.

Acting! Just acting…

 

Dinner turned into a disaster, despite the way it had started out.

The men had gone out to take care of the meat. Kylo had at first insisted on staying inside, but at his dad’s insistence he gave in. Rey too went outside at first, not wanting to leave him stranded. He told her to pick what meat she wanted and while Han and Chewie offered them a beer, both declined.

“Maybe when we sit down.” Kylo had told his father, who had shrugged and thrown some more steaks onto the grill. Eventually, she got cold. Father and son were engaged in a conversation about cars. Apparently Han was working on an old model that he lovingly called “the Falcon”.

“I think I’ll go back inside.” Rey had interrupted gently and he had told her to just go ahead and that he’d join her in a second.

When he came in, all was still rather well. Together they had finally started a fire and she had stared while the flames began to spread on the firewood. He had chuckled, placed a large hand on the small of her back and had told her to add another piece of wood. She had then leaned her head against his shoulder. His mother was watching them, she was sure. Eventually, the only member of the group Rey hadn’t met yet joined them. Mr Calrissian had been out on a little ski trip. A handsome man despite being in his 60s, he greeted her warmly, dark brown eyes settling on Kylo.

“I might steal that one from you if I were younger!” he winked at the other man, extending a hand.

So yes, that had all went very well. Dinner had been delicious and Rey had begun to let her guard down.

And then Han mentioned Kylo’s boss.

She didn’t know how it happened. All of it had gone incredibly wrong at an unbelievable speed. Shouts, accusations, insults followed by more accusations.

Leia, eyes wide and pale like a sheet.  
Mally –Chewie’s wife– having placed a hand over her husband’s to keep him from intervening.

Luke trying to do just that and making it so much worse.

Lando yelling at them to calm down.

Kylo and Han storming off into different directions, Han upstairs, Kylo out onto the backyard.

Rey… utterly lost as she tried to stitch together what had just happened.

 

She snapped back into in the moment when she realized that Leia was crying into her hands. Mally had leaned over her, patting her back, trying to console her. Chewie and Lando followed Han. Which left her.

At first, she had joined Mally in her attempts to calm Leia. However, as the tiny woman heard her voice, her eyes were immediately on the open door to the backyard.

“Dear, please, could you… He has no jacket and it is cold and…”

Rey nodded and hurried to get Kylo’s jacket to him.

She found him close to the fireplace, hands held to the remaining warmth of the embers that still glowed, but shivering nevertheless.

“Go away!” he snapped.

“Your mother…” at hearing her voice he whirled around. “She wanted you to have this.” Offering him the jacket, she approached slowly. She was scared. A bit. He took it out of her hand none too gently and turned away once more.

“Go back inside. You’ll freeze.” He ordered, not looking at her.

“Can you come in, too? Please?” she asked cautiously. She didn’t like angry men. They made her nervous and brought bad memories with them. She’d leave him be once he was inside, she silently promised to him. But he’d catch his death out here. It had started to snow again and the fire was fading quickly.

He sighed.

“I’ll follow in five minutes. I can’t be in there right now.”

She nodded, though he didn't see it.

“Should I wait for you? Inside, I mean.”

“Do as you please.” He growled and this time she didn't wait around. He was mad and aggressive and didn't want company. Giving him space was the wise choice.

Walking back in, she found Leia no longer crying.

“Did he take the jacket?” she asked, worry making her voice weak.

“Yeah. He’ll come inside in a few minutes. Kylo wants to calm down first, I think.” She told the other woman in a soothing way.

“Rey, I am so sorry about this. Snoke has always been an uneasy subject between us and Han… I am so sorry your first stay with us is such a mess. Did he say something? He won’t leave the house now, will he?”

_Oh God…_

“He said nothing about leaving, don’t worry.” She told Leia gently. “It is all a bit much I think.”

Covering her mouth with one hand, Leia allowed them to lead her towards the couch.

“What you must think of us…” the older woman sighed. “Your own family must seem tame after witnessing this.”

She didn’t have the heart to tell Leia about her own family situation. It’d just make the other woman feel sorry for her and she didn’t want to appear like she was attempting to get pity. So she just smiled softly. Mally told them that she’d go and find out how the men were doing and hurried off.  
Mother and fake-girlfriend were left alone.  
Waiting for Kylo to come back in.  
It took him longer than 5 minutes to do so, so Leia wrapped herself into her jacket and tentatively walked out into the cold night. Rey sat by the fire. Waiting and wondering what kinds of drama the next days would bring if this happened on the first evening. Suddenly, she didn’t feel extremely overpaid anymore, just very!

 

Leia remained out there for quite a while before she returned back inside.

Alone.

“Are you alright?” Rey asked as the woman approached, looking tired.

“Fair warning for the future you and Ben might have; he inherited that stubbornness from my part of the family.” Leia tried to laugh at her own quip but failed.

The young woman could have asked as to why she called him Ben, but didn’t. Somehow it felt like an invasion of his privacy. Instead, she just stared into the flames of the fireplace.

“I think I’ll go to bed now… if Han stopped ranting by now. Rey?” a small hand was placed between her shoulder blades. “It is really nice having you here. I hope tomorrow we’ll get to talk some more. I’d like to hear more about that art exhibit you’re got coming on.”

She promised Kylo’s mother that she’d be delighted to fill her in. Soon afterwards, she got up, walked towards the glass-door and stared outside. Should she tell him that she’d go up now? Let him know that everyone was gone?

Deciding against it, she went upstairs, with an arm-full of fire-wood. When he got back he ought to be kept warm. Though he shouldn’t be this stubborn! He’d get sick and she’d be left behind to care for him.

Maybe she should go back down and try getting him back in?

No! No, he needed space. She was not going to risk anything.  
Before starting a fire in their own fireplace, she took a hot shower and changed into soft pyjama pants and a long sleeved jersey.

Upon exiting the room, she saw Kylo, kneeling in front of the fireplace, holding his hands out towards the fire he had just started.

“I apologize for the hassle.” He mumbled, the fire’s warm glow lighting up his features. His fingers were still shaking and she frowned.

 

* * *

 

 

This had been stupid!

He should’ve just stormed downstairs, take the long way back to the room that had been his since he had been a child. Instead he had almost spent 40 minutes in the blistering cold, watching and feeling the warmth of the brazier die down.

First Rey had joined him and the jacket had helped, giving him more time.

Then his mother…

No, no he wouldn’t think about that. Not now.

When Rey came out of the bathroom, he had great difficulty meeting her gaze. It had never been his intend that she’d see something like tonight. Goodness, he had even snapped at her.

He felt bad. Which was part of the reason why he excused himself and went to take a shower. A long one. When his feet stopped hurting from the cold, he finally got out from under the spray of hot water, dried himself and got dressed for bed.

When he got out, Rey sat in one of the chairs by the windows, reading a book. When she looked up at him, she looked more worried than relaxed.

“Rey, I… I should not have snapped at you. You have nothing to do with any of this.” He stated. She nodded.

“Are you okay, Kylo?”

He shook his head.

“This will be just as hard as I thought.” He told her honestly and sat next to her in the armchair.

“I am sorry.”

At this he shook his head. “Why would you be sorry? You didn’t insult the life I am living.”

Out of the corner of his eye he saw her bite her lip. No. None of this was her business really. So he changed the subject.

“You did well though. I hope kissing you was okay.”

“Sure.” She said in a small voice.

Part of him had hoped so. He had liked it. Though he’d never admit that. He wasn’t so desperate as getting gratification out of kissing someone who was paid to hold still or pretend to like it.

Where was the thrill in that?

Under different circumstances, holding her would have been very nice.

It was getting close to 11 and the house had settled down.

“Are you warm enough?” she suddenly inquired, catching him by surprise.

“I am fine.” He got up. “I’ll go downstairs now. Get some work done before bed. Good night.”

“Good night…”

 

He didn’t fall asleep for quite some time, even after finishing most of the work he had set out to get done. Not one of Snoke’s cases, but for a social institution he helped out with legal stuff sometimes. Currently, he was working on a case concerning a foster family who had apparently mistreated the children under their care.

He thought of Rey.

An orphan. He briefly wondered whether anyone had helped her in legal cases when she had needed it. Had she ever needed it? She had been rather eager to change the topic…

How fucked up did his family appear to her?

With a growl he turned towards the tree.

A pretty tree, he decided, for a pretty mess of a Christmas party.

 

* * *

 

 

She had grabbed the comforter after putting all the lights out. Warmth from the fireplace pooled into the room and against her left side as she rolled the large blanket around her while huddling in front of the window.

It snowed very prettily now.

The night outside looked as dark as it was cold, but the tiny white flakes gave it a peaceful and serene atmosphere. Snow didn’t look like this in New York and she never had opportunity to just sit in front of the window and watch as it fell. Nor could she really. Everything was far too bright in the city.

It had been a weird first day, but she had found herself to be treated with kindness. Kylo was a complicated and indeed moody person, but it wasn’t like he was rude to her. If she truly were his girlfriend she would have acted differently during and after the fight though. With a huff, she tried to get the memory of Leia’s sad face out of her mind. Tomorrow was a new day! She’d be more girlfriend-like and not just the nice little thing, no!

Tomorrow she’d know what was expected of her, new people and surroundings would not startle her and she would not feel like she was supposed to simply keep her mouth shut and look pretty. In case he didn’t like it, he was welcome to inform her, but Kylo had –more or less– told her to act once she saw things getting out of hand. She’d be worth those 15000 dollars!

She yawned, but was unwilling to go back to the large bed yet.

Tomorrow was a new day, but now she was warm and comfortable and could watch the snowflakes cover up all of today’s grievances.


	8. On the Day Before Christmas My Fake Love Gave to Me...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE!!!!!!! I hope you had a wonderful time. To those who don't celebrate Christmas; Hope you got some peace and quiet during the holidays.  
> I tried typing while at my mother's house but didn't really get to it, so I only have this one chapter for you today. 
> 
> Thank you all for leaving Kudos, Subscriptions, Bookmarks and most of all Comments!!! You have no idea how they motivate me and keep me invested in this story. Thank you all though, even if you're just one of those who keep coming back with every chapter.

Chapter 8

 

Everything was warm perfection. She was half-awake, snuggled into the soft and large comforter. Surrounded by warmth and softness, Rey sighed contentedly. She hadn’t slept this well in ages, dreams filled with snowflakes and large trees that had kindly asked her to make them look pretty.

Slowly getting to the point where she was more awake than asleep, but pleasantly rested and thus okay and not even a little exhausted though a bit disoriented, the young woman smiled as her eyes opened. The brightness of the snow almost blinded her and with a grin, she shut her eyes again.

A soft knock on the door and at her sleepy-sounding “Come on in.” Kylo entered the room. Still a bit slow and not fully awake, his startled first words confused her.

“What’s this?”

“Hm?” she replied, sitting up in her little cocoon.

Huh. He looked taller in the morning.

“Why are you sleeping on the floor?” he asked, softly closing the door behind himself in a hurry.

Floor? Now fully awake, Rey turned her head from left to right, suddenly realizing that indeed she was on the ground. Blushing, she looked up at him.

“I fell asleep!” she stated the obvious, causing him in turn to frown.

“I can see that. Was something wrong with the bed?” he asked, walking around the bed, past her and towards the bathroom.

“Oh no, it’s lovely!”

Another frown.

“Then why sleep on the floor?” he asked through the half opened bathroom door.

“I- uh… I actually was watching the snow fall and must’ve dozed off.”

Silence from the bathroom, then the door opened a bit more and she saw Kylo, toothbrush in hand.

“You… fell asleep while watching the snow?!” he repeated slowly.

Rey blushed, but refused to acknowledged how silly this must sound to him. So what? Well, he could have slept in the bed if they had known their first night would end with the bed that had been intended for both of them to remain empty, but it hadn’t been like she had actively planned this.

“It was very beautiful.” She informed him instead. “You never see snow in the city. Not like this. I could even make out some snow-crystals when looking closely.”

For a second he just looked at her like he saw her for the first time, then, with the smallest trace of a smile, he turned away, shoving his toothbrush into his mouth.

Getting onto her feet, she got the blankets off the floor to make the bed. Was he going to make fun of her for this? Last year had been the first time she had seen snow for the first time in years, Nevada not exactly known for it’s white Christmases. Snow had been the one wonderful thing during her childhood. Everyone could play in snow! All you needed to build a snowman were two good hands. The orphanage had tried to ensure each of them would at least get a small gift for Christmas and that there’d be a small tree. But snow, though not always a given, had been part of Rey’s favourite and only beautiful Christmas in her childhood.

It had started to snow on Christmas Eve and when the children had woken up on Christmas Morning, the yard had been covered in snow. For some reason, everything had been much more festive. The doll she had received that year looked almost new, when they went to church some of the nice ladies of some church-group or other had presented them with knitted scarfs and little hats, the songs they had sung had sounded so much more beautiful and the Christmas pudding afterwards had been just a little bit better, too.

Snow had been the one wonder of her childhood that had ever returned to her. And if Kylo Ren thought this notion amusing, well, she’d not be sorry about his sleeping on the couch anymore.

The door opened a few minutes later, though she heard water running.

“You should take a bath.” He mumbled, walking towards the walk-in.

“A bath?” came her incredulous reaction. “I had a shower last night! The floor isn’t that dirty.”

Kylo stopped, turning his head to finally look at her.

“For your muscles… You slept on the ground and a bath will relax your body after laying on the hard ground all night.” He explained slowly.

Oh…

OH!

Now, wasn’t he considerate?

“Well… thanks, I’m fine but… okay?... How was the couch?” she asked, feeling obligated to at least inquire whether he was okay.

Kylo shrugged.

“I slept on less comfortable surfaces… The ground for example!” he told her with a cocky grin and went on into the walk-in, closing the door behind him before she could say anything.

Huffing instead, Rey went into the bathroom, realizing that the white bathtub was already half-full. Well, it couldn’t hurt could it? Especially since she kind of did realize the second thoughts her back must’ve had about her little nap.

Getting undressed, she slipped into the hot water, hoping that he’d be right!

 

* * *

 

Meanwhile, Kylo was very busy avoiding thoughts about how adorable and charming he found the fact that someone her age was still capable of being this excited about snow. He most certainly did not decide that she appeared to be at her prettiest when she was a bit sheepish. Nor did he think that her voice sounded rather hot when she was still sleepy.

Slipping on a dark-blue sweater, he sighed.

Not a good direction! He needed to keep himself under control.

Under no circumstances could he allow her to get under his skin. Not that she was actively trying to. There was something perfectly innocent about the way she talked to him while they were alone. Which was the whole problem! Nothing about her behaviour or the way they interacted suggested that there were any ulterior motives. Ugly as the truth was though; there very much were and he would be a fool if he forgot about that!

She was an escort, doing her job.

He’d be damned if he didn’t keep his part of the bargain and keep this professional at all times.

Despite all her charms and her sexy long le–

_God damnit!_

He’d have liked to wait for her to finish, but neither did he want to pressure her, nor did he think that spending time by having a conversation through a closed bathroom door would help him remain decidedly un-attracted by her.

“Rey? I am heading down. You take your time.” He called through the door.

“Save me some coffee!” she answered in a sing-sang voice. Which was rather endearing. And he hated that!

As he arrived in the dining-room on the ground floor, just next to the kitchen, he saw his mother talking to Lando and Luke, whereas Han, Chewie and Mally were getting ready to go outside.

“Be-Kylo… good morning.” Lando greeted, causing Han to turn and look at his son. His parents shared a glance as he replied with a neutral “Morning…” and went through to the kitchen to get himself coffee. If they were all assembled like this, he’d need caffeine!

As he poured the dark liquid into a white mug, his mother entered the kitchen.

“Ben…”

“Mother…” he warned, but it had no force in it.

“Whatever.” She dismissed, sounding determined. “I… I was going to have your father sleep on the couch… for starting the fight.” He grinned into his mug. Then that same grin fell. “But he came back and told me that it was already occupied. You and Rey… You two are okay, right?”

“I had work to finish and fell asleep on the couch. Rey is a light sleeper in the weeks before exams so I didn’t want to keep waking her.” He lied, blowing on his coffee.

His mother seemed happy with that explanation and sighed in a relieved way.

“I am glad. Did you talk to her after you came in? She seemed a bit shaken.”

She had?

Of course he had apologized for the whole affair, but she had given the impression of being fine. His mother must’ve imagined it.

“I apologized.” He admitted, sounding rather petulant to his own ears.

“Poor, darling thing… She is a sweet girl, though. Hey, later, I can help you wrap up her gift before we all place them under the tree. Knowing you, you’ve still not mastered the art of gift-wrapping.” Leia offered, her voice so hopeful that he hated the immediate urge to push her away. He had to though. Not because he didn’t need or want her help. Gifts simply had never come up between the two!

“Uh… Thanks. But this trip is my gift for her this year. So, unless you want to print and wrap the return-ticket there isn’t much to do. But thank you for the notion.”

He had ordered his secretary to get presents for his parents. Those were already gift-wrapped, thanks to the convenient services of most civilized stores. The idea of informing his mother smugly that he had been the one to gift-wrap them, but in the end he knew that she’d be capable of telling. Maybe he’d add a crocked bow later. Out of spite!

A sharp pain against in biceps ripped him out of his thoughts and he jumped slightly, more startled than hurt. His mother, a 5”0 force of nature looked absolutely miffed for some reason he was surely about to be told all about.

“I did not raise an inconsiderate fool, no matter what name he goes by these days!” a forefinger jammed itself in the middle of his chest and he couldn’t help but gaze down on it, open mouthed and at a bit of a loss as to what exactly he had done. “That lovely girl gave up her own Christmas plans to be here with you and she has had your back ever since you stepped through that door…” he made to interrupt her, but she only raised her voice a little more. Shuffling from the other room could be heard. “AND don’t think for a minute that I didn’t realize that! Now, I don’t know how you see it, but such loyalty is a wonderful character trait and you – will – honour –that!” with every word she rammed her finger into his chest. “After breakfast we’ll go to town and you and I will find something that befits that lovely girl, is that understood?”

Holy shit.

“Benjamin, is that understood?”

“Y-Yes, mum!” he stuttered, incapable of saying much otherwise.

_Holy. Freaking. Shit!_

“Leia…” came a voice from the door. It was Luke. “Everything okay here?”

“Of course!” Leia sniffed, marching off, leaving Kylo behind to stare at her retreating back. “Your nephew just informed me that he’ll need to do some last-minute shopping.” When she was out of sight, he heard “YOUR son through and through!”.

Where exactly had the last 20 or so years of his life gone and why did he still react like a 10 year old as soon as his mother began to look angry?

His uncle and he locked eyes and when his father pocked his head into the kitchen, he didn’t even have it in him to ignore the man anymore.

“Looks like it is one of those days on which you’re just _my_ son, kid.” His father joked, while looking about as confused as his uncle, who raised his prosthetic hand to point at his coffee.

“Would you like me to make that Irish?” he offered, joking obviously.

“Don’t tempt me…” he mumbled, taking a sip of coffee, his father and uncle chuckling.

This would be a long day!

 

* * *

 

 

Rey was busy drying her hair and did not hear the knock on the door. When a small hand was placed on her shoulder, she gasped in surprise and turned away quickly. Wide eyes met the apologetic ones of Leia Organa.

"I am so sorry, Rey! I didn't mean to startle you."

With a relieved huff and a short laugh, the young woman shook her head.

"No harm done. I am late for breakfast, I suppose?"

"Oh, no, dear, far from it. I just came up to tell you that Luke, Ben and I will head to town in a bit. Would you like to come too?" she asked kindly and Rey beamed at her. For the first time in her life she had money to spend on gifts without worries of spending too much. Maybe she could get something nice for her friends.

"I'd love to!"

Rubbing the younger's arm, the older woman smiled, leaving her to her own devices. Soon, she hopped down the wooden steps. Upon finding nobody in the living-room, she went down another flight of steps, hearing low voices.

"Good morning!" she greeted joyfully as she rounded the corner into the room where Kylo, Luke and Leia were sitting.

The room was kept in bright colours while the long dining table was made out of dark wood.

"Did you sleep well, Rey?" Luke inquired politely and she nodded eagerly.

"Very, thank you! Yourself?"

He made a dismissive gesture with his hand.

"I always sleep like a stone, never on the first night though." he explained. “So, it doesn’t really count.”

"I am sorry to hear that." the young woman told him, helping herself to some juice. “Where are the others?”

Kylo scoffed into his coffee.

“You mean the… Ah! What the–“ he had jumped in his seat, whirling around to glare at his mother who appeared to be nonplussed by his dark stare. Brave woman!

“Han and the others went to freshen up their ski-savviness, to quote him. I for one just hope there won’t be any broken legs.”

“Or necks…” Kylo mumbled once again, now glaring at his pancakes before he once more jumped in his seat. Turning to send another death-glare at his mother, he was already greeted by two very dark, very no-nonsense kind of eyes. “I meant that!”

“Oh course you did, dear, and I hope your boss will have a long and healthy life.”

Kylo was opening his mouth to –undoubtedly snap at his mother, but Luke intervened.

“So, Rey! Be–Ahm Kylo tells me that you’re an art student. How do I imagine that? You don’t sit around all day drawing naked folks do you?”

A sort of nervous laugh escaped her.

The fuse was short in this family!

“No, no. But we do have classes in sketching, drawing and painting nudes. I took the course last semester.” She explained.

“I couldn’t imagine doing that. Could you?” Luke asked, eyes on mother and son. The thought alone had Kylo shudder.

“No thank you. I am fine with Rey sketching me, but apart from that…”

He broke off, realizing that he was willingly taking part in a conversation with the uncle he so despised. There was a secretive smile on Leia’s lips and she said nothing. Which was lost on no one.

“Leia?”

“I don’t want to know!”

“Oh shush, you two, it was one time!”

“WHAT was one time?” Kylo demanded, despite the fact that he had proclaimed not wanting to know. Rey chuckled at his shocked expression. Luke fared no better, the poor man had paled and his mouth hung open for a second before he remembered to close it. She liked them all considerably better when they were like this!

“Change of topic!” the older man almost cried out in distress. Undoubtedly, this was not where he wanted the conversation to go!

“I was legal and he was a friend.” Leia explained in a voice that indicated that there had been nothing wrong with that.

“Was dad there?” Kylo appeared rather afraid to ask.

“Of course not… but you were. Sort of!” Leia said and stood up. Rey almost choked on her piece of toast, Luke’s eyes searched Kylo’s and Kylo himself looked like he had just lost the will to live. “Maybe Rey would like to have a look at the painting that resulted from those sketches. I bought it a few years ago.”

The tall, dark haired man had buried his face in his hands, but sat up again upon hearing the offer.

“She is not looking at a picture of you while you were naked and pregnant!” he hissed and received a cold look from his mother.

“That is for her to decide. Now quit making such a fuss, it is a very tasteful picture.”

“But…”

“Keep it up young man and I’m getting out the pictures we took of potty-training!”

His face was priceless.

Dark eyes widened, his full lips parted as if in a silent scream and his ears suddenly glowed red. He was dying a slow death by humiliation and Rey, fighting a fit of laughter, slapped her hand over her mouth, tears in her eyes and soft, very faint sounds of choked giggles and withheld chuckles audible.

He attempted to glare at her, but failed miserably.

“I… am…” _Earthquakes. Wildfires. The Red Wedding._ “So sorry!” She continued to list sad things in her head.

 

* * *

 

 

An hour after the worst breakfast of his life, he found himself in the backseat of his mother’s car. They were approaching town slowly, due to the new snow. His mother had always been wary of driving in such weather.

“I need to pick up a few things. Luke, Rey, would you two mind terribly if we were to break up and you two will be left on grocery duty?”

“Sounds fine with me.” Luke said, turning around to look at Rey. “What do you say?”

“Sure.” She answered, eyes turning towards him and in a low voice asked “Will you be okay?” while his mother was talking Luke through some of the things they’d need.

“I don’t have a choice… Listen–“

“Rey, I will leave the wine picking to you! Luke has horrible taste in alcohol and I trust the young to know their spirits.” Leia interrupted and winked at the young woman next to him. No warning her then!

 

They dropped Rey and Luke –who both looked far more enthusiastic about going to town than he did. Once more he had caught Rey gaping at the –admittedly– beautiful snowed in mountainside. The sky was of a cool, clear blue and the sun had the freshly fallen snow glister. She had even nudged him a few times during the ride to point out one thing or the other. Her lips were stretched into a large, bright smile as they passed heavily decorated houses, frozen rivers and trees that were almost vanished beneath the white blanket. In her joy she had commented that the air was so different, so fresh and cold. He agreed on the cold. It was freezing!

“See you later!” Rey called, waving after them as they drew off.

He had remained in the backseat and grinned at her antics.

She was like a child when happy; innocent, unapologetic and pure in her joy. Kylo decided that he rather liked that about her and grinned into his clenched fist.

His mother remained silent. However, he couldn’t shake the feeling of being watched. When he looked though, her brown eyes were glued to the street.

 

* * *

 

Luke was a kind man, Rey decided 20 minutes into their grocery shopping.

A bit awkward, but pleasant to talk to. He filled her in on small, silly anecdotes about past Christmases –their very first one as a family after finding out that he and Leia were twins who had been separated at birth, Kylo’s first one, the one where the tree caught fire and so on. She in return only had one Christmas tale to share that wouldn’t sound miserable, so she was contented herself with listening and asking one question after the other. Luke, a headmaster of a private school, was a born storyteller, not only because he had a very ready and eager listener in her. He talked with his hands and –though his eyes had a sad glint in them whenever he thought of a Christmas with and without Kylo– he made her laugh.

“And one year Ben… oh, sorry, I keep slipping up. Kylo, well, he had just turned 5. And he had gotten himself into a fight with some of the kids while out. Apparently they had figured out the Santa thing already, whereas Ben was kept blissfully unaware and took it upon himself to defend the old man’s honour.” His eyes took a far away look as if he could still see the scene. “Of course, Leia had told him not to start a fight and when we were told what had happened, he had been sent to his room so we could assess the situation. Han thought the whole thing incredibly funny and defended the kid. Now, while I could not encourage such behaviour, he did it for the right reason I think. He still thought of Santa as a friend, you know?”

Rey smiled at him, but remained silent. Father Christmas had let her down too harshly when she spent her first Christmas in the orphanage. She had been incredibly good! Every five year old knew that when you were very, very, very, nice, you’d get what you’d wished for in your letter.

So, when one of the ladies in church had written their letters for Father Christmas, she had wished that her parents would come back and that she promised to be just as nice when she was back with them as she had been in the orphanage.

She had gotten a doll with a sewn on mismatched leg.

“What did you do?” she asked.

“Well, Han drove into town and returned with a certain sweet. They’re called Santa’s Chocolate Coal Bag.”

“Naughty children get coal!” Rey nodded, understanding.

“Indeed they do! Chewie, who –I swear– has the most beautiful handwriting I’ve ever seen wrote a little note and under the tree they went. When he came down on Christmas morning, he found the coals and the letter which told him that Santa understood that he had meant to do the right thing, but that he shouldn’t start fights.”

Rey smiled once more, this time she even did it because she thought the story adorable, not to mask her own sadness.

“So cute…”

“He’s loved those damn things ever since. Insisted on them until he was around… 15? 16? I think he considered himself too grown up.”

“I’ve always loved Candy Canes. They lasted you incredibly long and looked so pretty.” She mused to share at least one Christmassy anecdote too. It probably didn’t count as one, but it was the only thing from her early childhood she felt safe to share.

“I myself am a hot chocolate with marshmallow kind of guy.”

“Does that taste good?” Rey wondered, not sounding convinced.

“Tell you what, we’re getting you a cup after this, what do you say?” he offered and she nodded with a bright smile.

“Do we pass a candy store on the way?” she asked, an idea coming to her. Poor Kylo was probably very uncomfortable and she wasn’t doing what she was paid to do at the moment. He ought to get a little Christmas treat.

“Sure. Got to get more Candy Canes!” he said with a twinkle in his eye.

Definitely the family member of the day, that one!

 

* * *

 

 

“And don’t suggest we get her art supplies.” Leia nagged as Kylo and her walked through town.

Well, there went his only idea; tossed right out the window by his mother. Which, judging from the dry chuckle that left her, had been written all over his face.

“I swear, you and your father…” she mumbled under her breath.

He sighed.

“Mother, I told you, Rey is perfectly happy with the vacation.”

“Oh, don’t be ridiculous, none of us is that great a company. I bet she misses her own family very much and would hate for her to regret coming along to hold your hand.”

Now he had to hold back a groan.

No, Rey would not regret coming along, because she got paid well and would have been alone anyway since she was an orphan. There was no one she missed and no one who missed her. Not pondering what a horrible thought had just crossed his mind, he realized what else his mother had just said.

“And she seems to think of us as great company!” he hissed, fighting a pout that he felt his mouth form into.

“Which is exactly why you ought to hold onto her, because I would have run away by now.”

Remembering Rey’s request to try and make the whole trip pleasant, he elected not to call her out on her hypocrisy. Bachelor Han surely had never made her run and there was no way in hell they were worse than him.

“Then why can’t I just get her something she actually has use for? Her sketchbook is almost falling apart from being used every day.” Whether she did use it every day he had no way of knowing, but the book had almost fallen apart when he had browsed through it. It was as good a guess as any.

Leia looked him dead in the eye; “Because I am already getting her a new sketchbook. And some new pens. And ink! She mentioned wanting to experiment with ink and plastic. I still remember which brands are good from when you tried your hand at calligraphy.”

_Ugh…_

Great! His mother would shower her with something great that she’d actually need, whilst he would be left getting her… what exactly?

“She’d not the perfume kind of girl…” he mumbled and Leia nodded.

“No, she doesn’t strike me to be someone with a big perfume selection. She did wear something nice yesterday. What brand is it? Maybe she needs a refill.” Leia suggested, which would have been very helpful if he had the slightest idea as to which perfume Rey used. He tried to remember, but he didn’t even see a bottle standing in the bathroom.

He hadn’t even realized that she had been wearing anything artificial. Rey smelled nice, don’t get him wrong, it just hadn’t occurred to him to breathe her in to judge. Which he would have done if he had been her real boyfriend. She would struggle with the lack of personal space.

He did not imagine nuzzling her.

Under no circumstances did he picture her leaning into him.

And no way in hell did he just- almost run into a lamp post.

Leia’s laughter had his face burning, but at least his mother had forgotten about the perfume thing.

“She wants to learn how to ski! I could get her a personal instructor.”

“I thought you were going to teach her. Wouldn’t that be more romantic?” Leia argued and of course it would be.

What else did he know about Rey?

Her wish to learn skiing was a dead end because his mother was right. Also, no man in his right mind would leave their girlfriend alone with one of those always smiling, perpetually flirting personal trainers. Leia had stolen the art thing from him. He knew Rey would not appreciate anything to dress. While unpacking, he had caught sight of a very lovely black cashmere turtleneck that would hug her perfectly, he figured. Complimenting her, she had stretched as to how cheap it had been in the thrift shop she had gotten it.

Sighing once more, earning a compassionate pat on his back from his mother, he glanced around helplessly.

What else did she love?

He went over the last 24 hours, hoping there would be something, anything that would help him. For a moment he considered getting her a stuffed dog, since a real one would be a bit of a stretch, but had he seen an opportunity to get her a cat or a puppy, he’d have done so just to be done with the whole ordeal.

While his mother was excitedly talking to a sales assistant in the art supplies store they had walked into, he was becoming grumpy.

She probably wouldn’t even have time for a puppy anyway! She’d have someone to fall asleep on the floor with while watching the…

His face stoic as if he hadn’t just had the most brilliant stroke of genius, he walked up to his mother and told her that he’d be back in a few minutes.  
“No electronic kitchen devices either!” she called after him.

He snorted. He wasn’t _that_ much like Han!

“The big Christmas massacre of ’93, I remember!”

When Leia laughed this time, the sound that followed him was filled with fondness and warmth. Without thinking he smiled back at her. She turned back to the woman who was helping her pick Rey’s gift and he heard something like ‘my son!’, sounding… proud.

Focus!

Snoke!

Hux!

Job!

Life!

Sucks!

With a heavy feeling in his gut, he rushed down the road.  


	9. 'Twas the Emotional Turmoil before Christmas

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HAPPY NEW YEAR, Everyone :)  
> I hope you had a wonderful New Year's Eve and spend it to your personal liking.  
> My own massive hang over is losing some of it's ferociousness and I finally had  
> the energy to sit down and post this.
> 
> Big Announcements:
> 
> 1\. YOU'RE ALL AMAZING!!! I WAS SO FLOORED BY THE RESPONSE THAT THE LAST CHAPTER GOT! THANK YOU THANK YOU  
> THANK YOU!!!  
> Seriously, you people are wonderful and I am so glad you've been enjoying this story enough to leave so many comments and about A HUNDRED Kudos like... woah. This is how you keep me at work :D
> 
> 2\. I have a lovely beta now! kishleylam decided to be so kind and help me out and she has been an incredible help :)  
> THANK YOU, SWEETY!!!!

Chapter 9

If Luke had taken notice of her checking the price tags –a habit of hers– of everything she put into the basket while they went looking for gifts, he didn’t comment on it. Rey was used to living on a strict budget, so spending $5 on a bag of chocolates was quite the splurge. Christmas prices were such daylight robbery! Especially since the leftovers would be sold half price come Wednesday, she was certain of it.

But she was happy. She could actually afford getting overpriced chocolate, could do so without worrying whether it might cause her to be short of rent money. Rich people didn’t know how lucky they were! After leaving another store where she got some nice liquor for Chewie and Mally as well as scotch for Lando (Luke had helped her pick these gifts, although he was sure to insist that she was under no obligation to get anyone anything). Once they were done shopping, they got hot chocolate with marshmallows in a crowded coffee house and sat down on a tiny table in the far corner. Surrounded by bags and emotionally distressed people as well as excited children, they looked over their booty. Rey had wanted to get a little something for Rose, Finn and Paige as well, telling Luke a few details about her friends during their shopping spree. How Rose really wanted to visit Australia one day, hence the short trip to a toy store where she had bought a very cute grey stuffed Koala. Or how Finn had a special place in his heart for old black and white movies –causing Rey to be incredibly happy to find a few dvds for him. Paige’s distrust for electronic calendars immediately endeared the girl to Luke and they found a very nice personal organizer for her. Now, he once more voiced his concern about Rey getting gifts for people she hadn’t even known longer than a day.

“I know that Kylo got gifts for Han and Leia, I saw him unpack them. But I don’t know whether he got anything for you and the others.” She told him with a grin. “I just don’t want him to feel bad in the aftermath.”

“You got me something? When?” Luke asked, genuinely surprised. The girl gave a tight-lipped grin and drank her hot chocolate. The tiny marshmallows were sweet and soft. She’d have to make this once she was back in New York!

“No need to concern yourself with it.”

Her phone started buzzing in her jacket. Fishing it out of her pocket, she caught Luke’s smile.

“That’ll be them. Tell them to come in here.”

It wasn’t them.

“This is Rey…” she greeted.

“Merry Christmas, dearest!” Maz hollered into the phone. The young woman quickly leaned a bit further away from Luke. “Are you alone?”

“I am having hot chocolate with Kylo’s uncle. We’ve been doing some Christmas shopping.” She explained, hoping to sound cheerful.

“Ah, better not mention it is me then. Luke knows me too well… How are you? Having fun?”

“I am. Everyone is so nice and Aspen is beautiful.”

Luke smiled happily at her.

“Your mother?” he asked softly.

“Huh?”

Maz laughed, having heard the question.

“Is it your mother? Hand her over, I want to thank her for borrowing you to us on Christmas. She ought to know that you’re in good hands here.” He offered in that friendly voice of his, extending a hand.

“No!” she said, jumping to her feet. “It is my friend Paige. I’ll take this outside really quick, it is too loud in here.”

Maz was still laughing when she made her way through the crowd, leaving a startled Luke behind. She didn’t see the frown on his face, not did she realize that he had heard the voice of a woman who very much didn’t sound as young as Rey’s friend ought to be.

“Sorry about that.” She apologized when she got out of the coffee house.

“I’m a bit hurt that you wouldn’t want me as a mother, love.” Maz’ whined overdramatically, her hurt feelings evident by the laughter the older woman clearly tried to contain. “I only called to check whether Kylo was acting nice.”

“Didn’t our schedule say I’d call you at six?” Rey wondered.

“It did. But something came up and I had to decide what to do. It wasn’t too much of a problem I hope?”

“Nah, Maz, I’m good.” She gazed back through the window, seeing Luke with his own phone. “I think things are going rather well.”

All in all, Maz sounded content with both the job Rey was doing as well as the treatment she had been receiving. They soon ended the call and Rey went back in.

“Kylo and Leia are on their way to pick us up.” Luke informed her and she nodded. Good! They had been in town for the better part of three hours and she wasn’t the kind of person who enjoyed long shopping sprees. So, when Leia’s silver van pulled up, she was reasonably glad. Kylo hopped out of the car and helped Luke and her with their bags.

“You two were busy!” Leia commented from the driver’s seat.

“We don’t want to starve up there now, do we?” Luke answered, grinning.

“And let’s not even imagine running out of alcohol…” Kylo mumbled, earning a soft nudge from Rey.

“Don’t be a Scrooge, big guy.” She admonished, smiling up at him and leaning her head against his shoulder.

 

* * *

 

 

A Scrooge?

Him?

The girl really had no idea what she was in for during Christmas. What had been delightful when he had been a child –namely, staying in the house with just each other for company– was now just a real pain in his ass. When he had been younger it had been a real treat; it was the one time every year when his mother wasn’t rushing from one country to another. His father had been home more often as well. For that, he had loved Christmas.

Sure, these days he was too busy to pay as much attention to it. However, he liked the lights and the Christmas carols (for the first 200 times hearing them), did not rant over his assistant wanting a week off from work and never complained over national holidays in his life. Thus, he considered himself to be as far away from being like Ebenezer Scrooge as the little girl that was passing by wearing Santa’s hat, while holding her mother’s hand. 

“I need to talk to you when we’re back.” He whispered as he followed her into the car. She whirled around, eyes wide with worry.

“Did I do something wrong?” she asked in a small whisper.

Feeling bad, he made to put her at ease, but his mother rolled down her window and told them to get in already. Ruined was Rey’s easy smile and wide gaze of wonder. All the while during their drive home she remained silent, sending him worried glances, which he didn’t know how to dissolve. It bothered him more than he could say. Unable to say anything he, rather stiffly, reached out his hand and placed it on top of hers. With a puzzled look, her thumb timidly brushed against his hand and he nodded and tried for a small smile.

\---

“What’s wrong?” she immediately asked after they had gotten into their room.

“My mother insisted that I get you a gift.” He hurriedly explained, holding up his hands in a calming gesture, feeling bad that he had worried her.

“Oh…” she blinked a few times, then a slow but bright smile spread on her pretty face. “Well, that’s not so bad. I got you something too.”

What?

“You did?” he asked, very much surprised. They had talked about it prior to their trip. They had agreed on the trip being his gift to her and that she had started a painting for him, which hadn’t been brought along due to the fact that it was rather large.

“Yup!” she said cheerfully and hopped onto the bed to take off her shoes.

“We didn’t agree on that beforehand.” He argued, causing her to stop struggling with her boots and sit back with a huff. Leaning back onto her hands, she met his insecure gaze.

“You’re one to talk! And don’t worry. It’s just a little something.”

He nodded.

Well, that didn’t sound so bad. Also, it would have been awkward for her to receive something and not have anything to give in return. Kylo shifted his weight from one foot to the other and cleared his throat.

“What did you get me?”

Her eyes narrowed in a mock-glare.

“None of your business.” She answered, pulling up one leg to rest on the other so getting her shoes off would be easier.

“I don’t like surprises!” he tried to argue, feeling rather… giddy.

“I don’t like Tuesdays, and yet they always come round eventually.” She told him, laughter in her voice.

Tuesdays?

Weird woman!

“Rey, I am a grown man.”

“Well, grown men ought to be in the possession of the great virtue that is patience.” She teased, recalling Professor Holdo using those exact words on students almost every session. At this point she was close to bursting into a fit of giggles over his immaturity. 

“I won’t tell you what your gift is either!” he tried to threaten, crossing his arms in front of his chest. She got off the bed, shaking her head slowly while laughing softly and made to walk past him.

“You pout when you don’t get your way, did anyone ever tell you that?”

His mouth slightly dropped and without thinking he poked her in the side, causing her to jump and laugh out loud.

“Stop that!” she ordered.

“Tell me what you got me!” he ordered once more, poking her in the side once more. This time she shrieked and her shoes dropped to the floor. Her tiny hand grasped for his to prevent further attacks.

“Come on tell me!” he cooed reaching out his second hand. Once more she shrieked at the impact, jumping almost into him, her head brushing against his chest for a moment. Rey began to wriggle in her attempt to get away from him, grabbing his free arm as well.

“Nooo-Argh!”

He was stronger than her. He could easily keep tickling her if he so pleased, but he needed to be careful. When she was as close as then, he always remembered how small she really was.

A soft cough had them jump apart.

Lando was leaning against the doorframe, smirking at them.

“I’d tell the two of you to get a room, but… you two did everything right!” he joked good-naturedly, extending his hand to make a waving gesture to the room.

Rey rubbed her sides, looking like she was trying to glare despite still struggling through a laughing fit.

“Don’t let me interrupt anything, Leia was just wondering whether the two of you were hungry.”

“I could eat.” Rey said readily, searching his own gaze. He nodded at Lando. He’d rather not have her go hungry.

“We’ll be down in a moment!” he told the other man, who winked at him and chuckled as he closed the door.

“Mom got you something, too.” he said while sitting down to get his shoes off as well.

“What?” the panic in her voice would have been hard to miss.

With slightly widened eyes, he glanced up at her. The girl appeared to be completely taken aback by this piece news, while him getting her something had left her pretty unmoved. “I have nothing for her!” there was something restless and sad in the way she said it and he didn’t care for that tone.

“It’s fine! The gift she’ll receive from me will be big enough, don’t worry.” He quickly supplied in a neutral voice. It wouldn’t do to sound agitated now. This was no big deal. She had only met his mother yesterday and Leia’s insistence on getting Rey something ought not to cause the girl any discomfort.

“No, but I… I got something small for Luke, Lando and the others because I didn’t know whether you bought anything for them…” she explained, sinking onto the bed next to him, her fingers tapping quickly against the quilt they sat on. Her eyes were staring straight ahead at nothing in particular.

“What… Rey, you shouldn’t ha–“ he tried to admonish, but she jumped up out of a sudden and began looking through her travel bag.

“I got it!” she squealed; now smiling happily. “It won’t be much but it will be something.”

“What are you talking about?”

She beamed at him and… no, that definitely had not caused his heart to skip a beat just now.

“A present for your mom! You go ahead and have lunch, I got to get to work!”

What?

“But you just said you were hungry!” he argued, getting to his feet.

He’d not allow her to go hungry just because his mother knew no boundaries and had once more decided that her own idea of what she thought was right came before proper procedures of conduct. He should have fought her on this!

“I’ll be okay, I just got to finish this before tomorrow morning.” Rey argued, now running into the walk-in.

No! It would not be okay! Most certainly not.

This was not supposed to be how he’d spend the days.

“Rey!” he snapped and after a moment she peeked out of the closet.

“Yeah?”

“You are here to spend time with me! I paid you to spend the time I have to spend here with me!” he knew he sounded like a petulant, angry, and cruel child, but he didn’t care. The longer they were here, the more confused he felt.

About his mother, his father, Luke and even Rey herself, everything was too complicated, too much and too… everything!

Her face fell and she blinked a few times. Her mouth opened as if she wanted to say something, but she only licked her lips once and her eyes flew to the ground. Once more her mouth opened and she took a deep breath as if to say something, eyes still glued to the carpet she was standing on.

“I…” her voice collapsed.

He had scared her.

The words of his mother came back to him, how Rey had seemed a bit shaken to her. Yesterday, he had dismissed the idea, but now.

“Rey, I–“ he began but her thin voice interrupted him. Made him listen. Made a knot form in his throat.

“You’re right, I… You go ahead, I’ll be down in a minute, I just… I need to clean up.” With that she disappeared from his sight once more and he just sat there for a moment.

He had been cruel.

Worse.

He had been a complete asshole.

 

* * *

 

 

She had been stupid!

Worse.

She had forgotten for a moment.

Everything had just been a little too nice, a little too perfect. Kylo had been a bit moody and tense but very considerate and not unkind. His family might consist of members with very different characters, but they had welcomed her so warmly. And she had liked it all. She had liked spending a little bit of Christmas within a family. Everyone always complained about some aspect or the other when it came to the holidays. Grandma’s lack of boundaries, mother’s constant worrying, dad repeating the old stories again and again every single Christmas; she had liked the idea of observing what it would be like. To experience this new situation and finally, maybe, understanding what it was that they were all going on about.

At first, those stories had confused, even angered her. They had families to spend Christmas with, whereas she had had used dolls and later not even those, when Unkar Plutt announced that he was not wasting money on some little bastard having been born thousands of years ago. None of Plutt’s foster kids had even dared to wish him a merry Christmas. Not that they wished him a happy anything.

Eventually though, Rey had understood that the complaining did not stem from a lack of love or appreciation. None of them would ever even consider not going home for Christmas. She understood and yet she didn’t and Kylo’s family had been her chance to see for herself.

To open a door that had fallen closed right in her face when her parents...

But she had forgotten.

Kylo wasn’t some friend she was helping.

He had bought her. Like some other people bought a dog or a cat.

Or a whore…

Rey did not cry, but her stomach felt wrong. Heavy.

But she had needed a moment now or that wrong, heavy feeling might have grown into something else. And she shouldn’t cry. Not because he had reminded her of why she was here in the first place.

She was a distraction to him. Not more.

And that shouldn’t be a problem.

While she put the acrylics back into her suitcase, she heard steps behind her. It could only be him and he was approaching.

“I’ll be quick, it’s alright. But I don’t want to make a mess of things, not when everything else is so clean and in place and you’re quite right I–“ she rambled to calm him. She couldn’t know whether he was angry with her or not, but in her experience it was better to be safe than sorry.  

“Rey…” his voice came from behind her. Directly behind her.

Turning her head, she jerked away slightly.

Kylo had crouched down to match her own height while kneeling. His elbows rested on his thighs, large hands hanging between his bent knees.

The man didn’t meet her gaze.

“That was mean.” He muttered in that weird way of his. Like the words surprised him as they fell from his lips. “I am sorry. It came out wrong.”

One shuddering breath, then another, steadier one.

His eyes weren’t angry now. They were warm again. And shy.

“Nothing you said was untrue, Kylo.” She told him quietly, fingers playing with the corners of the acrylic case resting on her lap.

“Still, I… You said you were hungry and... That should come before my mothers gift.” Again, his voice sounded like it wasn’t used very often to express any kind of feeling. Like it wasn’t familiar with the notion of expressing himself carefully.

“It’s not so bad. I had a good breakfast.” She tried a smile. The muscles of his face twitched and he blinked in confusion.

“That was more than 4 hours ago.”

“That’s not so long.” She snorted and when she realized what she had just said, she shrank into herself, counting the colours.

_ Shit. _

Classic case of too much information.

Silence.

It stretched itself thin.

Her whole body jerked when he moved one of those big, warm hands to the space between her shoulder blades.

Their eyes met and she felt… caught.

She was incapable of putting her finger onto what exactly she had been caught doing, but the feeling was there.

“What were you going to paint for my mother?” he asked very, very softly. Funny. Rey had doubted that deep voices like his could sound so reassuring.

“I wanted to use a sketch of you… from the plane? I am sure I can use it for a portrait.”

That twitching of the nerves again and his eyes left hers once more, now settling on the acrylic case in her lap.

“I doubt she’d… Maybe she’d like a picture of the mountains better.” He suggested, his voice a soft rumble.

Rey tried for a small smile.

“Doesn’t matter now does it? You’re right, I should–“

“How about…” he interrupted, moving back a bit, his hand remaining on her back however. “After lunch, we come back up here, I get a bit of work done and you can work on whatever you want to.”

Again, their eyes met.

He was smiling a small, half-starved smile. It didn’t reach his eyes fully, like he wasn’t quite sure what he was doing. Grinning, she nodded.

“Good, then let’s eat.”

 

* * *

 

 

Lunch went by without any incidents. Han, Chewbacca and Mally were still out. Kylo promised Rey that he’d teach Rey how to ski tomorrow if the weather remained nice enough.

“The snow has to set, so we better hope there won’t be no more snow falls tonight.” He had explained to the excited girl.

“I hope we can go! I’m sure it’ll be fun.”

“Would you prefer skiing or the snowboard?” Leia asked, refilling Rey’s glass with juice.

“Which is easier to teach?” Rey wondered, turning her head towards Kylo again.

He shrugged.

He had learnt both eventually. When he had been 13 he had wanted to be just a little bit cooler. Ben Solo had had too tall hands and feet, his ears had been grotesquely large and his limbs long and gangly. Not a recipe for a calm life in uncle Luke’s school. Some of the other boys were like him, but most of them seemed… put together. Their voices had gotten deeper, like his. But they didn’t appear to have clown feet. Or ears better suited for an elephant.

So he at least wanted to do cool things.

Like snowboarding.

He had become very good at it too, though in the end it hadn’t helped a lot.

“I learnt boarding later.” he informed Rey simply, but Lando chuckled.

“He picked it up on a single weekend.” Frowning, he met the older man’s gaze. “You’re too humble! He managed pretty much everything on the first day. If I am not entirely mistaken it was stopping you had a real problem with.”

Leia laughed.

“Poor thing, he was covered in black and blue marks.” She added, shaking her head.

Luke thought hard for a moment.

“Was that why you wouldn’t sit down for dinner that night?”

His ears were burning and so were his cheeks as Rey laughed. A stern glance at her did not have the desired effect, because her laughs turned into a big smile. Trust his family to turn him into a joke!

“Thank you, uncle.” He growled.

“But you managed in the end, right?” Rey dug deeper, obviously not satisfied.

“The very next day!” Leia announced, grinning and sitting up straight as if it had been her achievement. “He was never a quitter. When he was determined to get something right, he’d work for it.”

It hadn’t been like this, ever. Leia Organa had barely praised her son. She hadn’t been proud of him or his successes. She had always claimed that all she wanted was for him to reach his potential, but Snoke had told him the truth. That he hadn’t been wanted. That he had been an accident! Kylo had often wondered how often during his childhood he had done well enough for her to be glad that he had been born. She had tried to love him, he knew that. And maybe when he had been younger she had succeeded often enough. But when he grew to have his own ideas and his own goals…

He had loved his mother very much.

She had been the woman who travelled around the world to make it a better, safer place and made powerful people get along better. All he ever knew from her was kindness. Warmth. Love. Or so he had thought.

The idea that he had been a mistake, a hindrance to her career, had been the last drop. What his uncle had done, on top of that had been too much.

But now…

“My ass hurt too much, I had to get it right.” He said dryly, causing everyone to laugh.

A soft weight settled against his shoulder. Looking down, he looked into Rey’s face, her head leaning against him.

“I am proud of you for not giving up… and for not landing on your ass anymore.”

He snorted and tilted his head to the side, temple resting against her forehead.

“Thank you, sweetheart.”

…

…

FUCK!

\---

Leia was going to get a bit of work done in her study, while Luke and Lando decided to go have a walk. That left Rey and Kylo, working in peace in their room.

The girl had chosen not to heed his advice and was using one sketch she had made as reference for the portrait.

The house had been very calm for half an hour.

While he had pretended to read some files, he was staring at the same spot on his screen for the better part of that half hour.

This would be a good moment.

His mother had left her laptop in the living-room.

He could do it now.

“Rey…” his voice was hoarse. “I’m uh- going to the kitchen for some juice. You want anything?”

“I’m good.” She chirped happily, not even turning away from her work.

Closing the door behind him, he stalked down the corridor and made his way down into the living-room, attempting to make as little noise as possible.

He felt bad about this. It wasn’t right, he knew that. But it had to be done if he didn’t want his life to be ruined. Snoke would and could replace him easily. There were too many young, ambitious people. People like Hux.

Losing his position to some faceless person would be bad enough, but he knew very well that Hux would not let the opportunity of sneering into his face go by. It couldn’t happen! He had worked too hard!

By now he no longer hoped he’d find nothing. In case there was some tiny little scandalous information on this computer he wouldn’t have to plant evidence against his mother. He was sure Snoke would have given him something to put on her that would utterly destroy her. While the young man understood why there were no second thoughts on Snoke’s side, he would rather not see his mother go to jail for some crime she hadn’t committed. So maybe if he found something little, he could simply misjudge it’s importance, report back to his boss that he had found something and burn the damn usb-stick or throw it into a garbage can on their way back home.

The computer still sat where he had seen it last.

It looked heavy.

Staring at the damn thing for a moment, he bit his lip, but then took one step towards the couch. Then another and suddenly he sat down, lifting it on his lap, opening it and… wonder whether his mother was the last person in the world who didn’t use an access code after inactivity.

With a heavy frown, he thought about where he should start looking, when his whole body jerked up into a standing position at the sound of his own name. Slamming the computer shut again and holding it in one hand, he stared up at the owner of the voice.

“Y-You forgot your laptop, mother.” He stuttered.

“I just realized!” Leia told him, smiling brightly. “I need it to finish up before starting with dinner.” She began coming down the stairs. “Your uncle and father are going to make the chicken. But you know how that usually turns out.”

A nervous laughter left him.

“Do you have a moment?” she inquired almost shyly and came closer very, very slowly. Approaching like he was some kind of skittish horse.

“I– yeah, sure.” He shrugged, then extended his arm to offer her the laptop. She took it into both hands, before placing it back onto the couch.

“Be–Kylo I…” she stopped herself, her voice having taken a peculiar tone. He frowned. It was almost as if she was about to…

The tiny woman closed the distance between them and hugged him, her head only reaching up to his chest. “I’m so glad you’re home.” She sobbed.

His ears hadn’t betrayed him. She had sounded like she had been about to cry.

She was crying. Not outright weeping but rather low, soft sobs.

And he was at a loss as to how to deal with a situation such as this.

“Mother…” he began without really knowing what he was going to say.

“I am so sorry…” she moved back, whipping at her eyes. “I am just really… Sorry.”

He stared down at her, still not knowing what to say, let alone how to feel.

While they were both sorting through their emotional turmoil, they just stood there, rooted to the floor.

What he had felt while she had hugged him or cried in front of him he still wasn’t quite certain. What he was certain of though was that this situation here was becoming more and more awkward as the seconds went by.

“I–“

“You should go and keep Rey company! I am so sorry I dragged you to go shopping with me when it was obvious that you’d rather have spent time with her.” Leia rambled.

“Sure… yeah… I think she had a good time. Got me a present. Won’t tell me what it is.” He rambled back.

Leia smiled.

“And you hate that.” She said fondly, a secretive smile on her lips.

“Yeah.”

Now his mother laughed, which… warmed him from inside somehow.

The day was becoming weirder and weirder by the second.

“You can be more affectionate with her, you know that, right?” she suddenly asked and he just really wanted some hole to open in the ground and swallow him whole. “You two keep holding back but… I saw the way you look at her and she seems like such a loving person. If you want to withdraw more to be alone if you feel weird about us being there you should. I’d hate for us to get between you two.”

His brain was numb, nothing that might interrupt her came to mind.

“You look happier when she’s around. I prefer to think of you as being happy. Me and your father both.”

Still.

Nothing!

“She’s pretty great, huh?”

WHAT?

Oh wait! That’s something people said about their girlfriends. Rey was of course great. Not in an escort way. He had no idea what made an escort great or not. But the girl seemed to be an interesting person. She was sweet and very pleasant to have around. And cute. Incredibly cute. Especially when she gazed at something in wonder. And when she got happy about something mundane.

God, he really hoped she wouldn’t fall asleep on the floor watching the weather again. That couldn’t be good for her back, no matter what she said.

Even though she probably looked very cute all curled up.

… he had to get a grip!

“I… should probably go back to her now.”

“You do that, sweety. I’ll go back to my work.” She told him, patting his back gently before grabbing her laptop.

\--

“And sleep in the bed tonight!” Kylo told her strictly before getting out of the room.

“Yeah, yeah…” she mumbled, still busy with the present for his mother. The girl probably hadn’t even heard him.

Crossing his arms in front of his chest, he licked his lips and waited.

“And make sure to sleep in your shoes.”

“U-hu…”

“Rey!” he called, a bit louder.

For the first time she turned towards him.

“Oh… sorry! But I am almost done.” She told him, a bit of colour on her cheek. He chuckled and walked towards her. Registering his intent, she stepped aside, a rather timid and worried smile on her face. In the corner of hi eye he saw her eyes travel between his face and the portrait.

Without knowing a first thing about art, he found her work to be incredible. She had worked with a great variety of colour, yet she had managed to make his profile look lifelike.

“So?”

The small word burst out of her like she hadn’t been capable to hold it back.

“I don’t look this good.” he mumbled. The portrait was rather… flattering in his opinion.

“Yes you do!” she argued and he immediately searched her face. A small blush crept up her cheeks as she quickly tried to withdraw the compliment without turning it into an offense, stumbling over her own voice. “Better, even… I mean… I didn’t draw anything that wasn’t there!”

He attempted to hold back a grin.

“Do you think you mother will like it?” she asked, insecure now.

“If not then it has nothing to do with the quality of the picture.” He praised, nodding. “Now, go and wash the colour off your cheek and go to bed!”

Rey blinked up at him, frowned and then glanced in the mirror that hung over the fireplace.

“Whoops!” she said, reaching for her cheek, dabbing at the spot to no avail. The blue streak had already dried. With an apologetic expression directed at him, she rushed into the bathroom, wishing him a good night.

He didn’t move a muscle, leaning against the bed slightly.

When she rushed out a few moments later, face clean, she stopped in her tracks.

“What? You’re gonna wait until I’m in bed?” she demanded, frowning, feeling caught out perhaps.

“Indeed!” he was not taking risks with that girl. He had the sneaking feeling that she’d been headed right for the portrait again for some wholly unnecessary last touches.  

For a moment she just stood there, contemplating of what to do.

Then she gave him a beseeching look.

“Kylo come on, just a few more strokes and it will be finished, I need to…”

“Bed!” he ordered in a hard voice and with a huff she marched towards the bed, threw back the covers and got in.

“Happy?” she snapped, arms crossed. A grin was tugging at the corner of her pretty lips.

Did she take him for a fool?

“Almost!” with that, he delicately took the portrait in hand, careful not to touch it and ruin any of her work.

“What are you doing?” she asked, suddenly on her feet again.

“I am taking this down with me and will place it under the tree for my mother to find it tomorrow morning.”

Her eyes widened and she opened her mouth, gaping at him. It had been like he had suspected. The little minx had tried to outsmart him. Adorable, really!

“Kylo, please, just–“ she stepped closer, reaching for the picture but he held it out of her reach. “I am not joking, give it here, it still needs some work!” she complained, standing on her toes. He now held it over his head and with one hand on his shoulder, the other stretched out, the girl jumped, trying to use him as leverage. “Please!”

He bowed forward, grinning into her face.

“No!” he said simply. When she tried to jump again, he pinched her in the side again, causing her to give a small squeak and jump away from him.

“You’re mean!”

“You’ll thank me later.” He told her, thoroughly unimpressed by her calling him mean.

She glared and pouted and with an indignant huff she went back to bed, turning her back towards him.

“Good night, Rey!” he teased in a sing-song voice.

“I hope Krampus comes for you.” He heard her growl under the covers.

With a chuckle he left to go to sleep.


	10. Did I misguide my sleigh tonight?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy shit, I never dreamt of this fic getting this much feedback and such kind one at that!  
> I can't stress enough how motivated and encouraged your comments and kudos keep me.  
> Thank you guys, it means so much, you have no idea. 
> 
> I was considering posting some pictures I used as references for the house, the rooms etc.  
> on my tumblr, but the story really didn't get any reaction over there and I'd hate to bother  
> my followers with a story they don't care about (hope that makes sense ^^").  
> Is anyone here following my Reylo blog (contains-reylo)? Let me know, say hi, I'm not a biter :) 
> 
> Once more a big shoutout to my beta (who happens to have a tumblr account too: pleasekalemenow).

Chapter 10

She’d have to somehow steal this blanket. And the comforter. And the fluffy cushion. Was there any way at all that the mattress would fit in her suitcase?

Waking up slowly while once more being wrapped in softness and warmth, Rey sighed contently, a tired, yet happy smile spreading her face. Snuggling a bit deeper into the bed’s comfort, she almost missed the noise of water running in the bathroom.

Stretching like a tired cat, she remembered.

Christmas morning!

Rolling onto her back, she opened her eyes, staring at the ceiling. She would have been lying if she claimed not to be a little bit excited about the gifts she’d receive.

She wouldn’t have to return them, right?

It was okay for an escort to accept gifts, wasn’t it? She remembered Paige informing her that she had once been gifted a lovely little handbag by one of her favourite clients.

Maybe he had gotten her some chocolate.

Or a book.

Maybe pencils. He did strike her as the kind of guy who’d get people practical gifts. Kylo didn’t know a whole lot about her despite all the pieces of information they had exchanged. She’d bet on art supplies and that would be fantastic. The amount she had gone through was beyond extensive, but she could not hold back on practicing. Suddenly, the water in the bathroom turned off.

Kylo was awake already, it seemed. Hopefully he had slept well. The couch did look comfortable enough, that much was true, but it could not compare to this bed, she was certain. Perhaps she could talk him into allowing her to sleep on the couch.

Glancing to the empty side of the bed, she bit her lip.

It was an incredibly large bed…

The door of the bathroom opened and some steam escaped into the bedroom, the nice smell of some product he used reaching her nose.

Rey made to sit up, a small smile on her face.

“Merry Christm—as.” She stuttered when she realized two things at once.

First; he obviously was not as fond of bathrobes as she was and second; … there was a second but she had trouble holding a thought while openly staring at his naked and glistering upper-body. His naked, glistering and incredibly well toned upper-body.

Biting her lower lip as he glanced over at her, obviously taken aback by her being awake and pausing in his movement to open the walk-in, Rey slowly laid back down.

“Sorry…” she croaked, blushing.

He must’ve stood there rather dumbstruck after having been thoroughly ogled by his hired girlfriend, because there was no noise of him continuing into the walk-in.

Finally, his voice filtered through the awkwardness.

“Merry Christmas, Rey.” His deep voice reached her embarrassed self. Not that she had never seen a man without their shirt on. She had been to enough nude-studies not to be shocked about anything that concerned the human body. But she had stared! At the man who was pretty much her employer. To add inappropriateness to injury, as soon as she heard the door open and close again, she breathed a soft; Wow!

To her mortification, this was answered by a very cocky, positively smug:

“Thank you!”

Whirling into a seated position, she gaped at Kylo, who was smirking at her, before opening the door and sauntering into the next room. Chuckling.

_Oh God… Shit…_

Dropping back onto the bed, Rey considered smothering herself with the soft pillow she had thought to be the best part of her morning only a few minutes ago.

 

* * *

 

 

He’d have a lot of trouble wiping that smirk off his face.

_Wow…_

Having his ego stroked this early in the morning was not the worst way to start the day. Especially when the day entailed lots of time with his family.

_Wow…_

Clearing both his throat and his thoughts, he slipped into a pair of black trousers.

When he left the walk-in a few moments later, Rey was nowhere to be found. The bathroom door was closed, so that was his first guess as to where she went. He grabbed his phone and went through his messages. Two from Snoke, who didn’t bother with seasonal wishes, just kept him informed about a case and what would have to be done before the year would be out. A third message was from Justin, his friend back from university who worked as a glorified hacker for some intelligence agency or the other. Apparently he was making progress on the little issue that had been bothering him ever since that one phone call with Maz.

He also had a missed call from the social worker who had approached him with the abuse case. Frowning, he called back.

“Hello, this is Ren. You called?”

 

* * *

 

 

Rey was met with a weird picture as she stepped out of the bathroom still in her pyjamas.

There he stood, that tall, broad-shouldered, dark-clad, cocky bastard of a man, lower lip sucked into his mouth, blushing like a catholic school-girl with his phone pressed to his ear.

Whatever this conversation was about, it must’ve been brought about by karma to punish him for eavesdropping on her embarrassing reaction. HA, Kylo 0, Karma 1!

His eyes were glued to the floor the whole time while he was listening attentively to whoever was on the phone. She was about to walk past him, when a very warm smile appeared on his face. His dark eyes, still not looking at anything in particular took a very warm glow and he blinked a few times.

“That was very good, Toby, well done.” He praised, voice a little rocky. “A very merry Christmas to you too… No I haven’t checked my presents yet, but I think I’ll go do that now. What did you get?”

His voice was different.

Softer, very careful and almost sweet.

This was obviously a private call and she rushed into the walk-in to get dressed as Kylo asked the other person –was he talking to a child? It sounded like it a bit. He didn’t have some child stored away, now did he?– to talk to Miss Connix again.

Was it any of her business whether he had a child? Why wouldn’t he have brought the kid then? Surely that would keep the family more occupied.

Should she ask about it?

She really didn’t want him to be one of those well-off guys who only called their children that they had with some one-night-stand or another when Christmas and birthdays came around. The idea that he might be one of those guys had her feel sick somehow and her heart sank. Yeah, he was a bit moody and easily angered, but all in all not so bad.

When she stepped out, dressed in a pretty, yet simple, tight grey dress that she had picked for Christmas morning the day she had packed her suitcase, he sat on the bed, typing something into his phone, before looking up at her and grinning.

“Wow, yourself,” he teased before turning back to the phone, still looking smug as hell and incredibly pleased with himself.

Rey pursed her lips indignantly and sat opposite of him in the chair by the window.

“Do you have a kid?” she burst out before she could change her mind.

When his head snapped up to meet her inquisitive gaze, he looked at her like she had lost her marbles.

“WHAT?”

“You heard me!” she insisted, crossing her arms in front of her chest.

The phone forgotten in his large hands, his jaw dropped, searching for words.

“N-No!”

“Sounded like you were talking to a child just now.” Rey continued, but sat back a little less tense. The young woman felt relief, but still stuck to her conviction.

“I did… Toby is a client. Well, kind of.” He explained like it was terribly obvious. “His social worker approached me a few weeks ago about his situation and I took up the case.”

Rey blinked.

Huh?

“Why would a child need a lawyer? And aren’t you super expensive?” she wondered, still not catching on.

“I sometimes accept cases that I consider deserving of my attention. As to why Toby would need a lawyer, I shouldn’t tell. Let’s just say that his foster parents are not in for a happy new year.”

Her heart did a painful jump and she suddenly felt herself pale in horror.

 

* * *

 

 

The way the colour was drained from her face and her eyes not only widened but almost appeared to shine with unshed tears, told him everything he had wondered about since he heard that she had grown up in a foster family.

Suddenly, she looked young, fragile and way too sad for Christmas morning.

“Did… they didn’t hurt him did they?” her voice sounded meagre and lost.

He couldn’t and wouldn’t fill her in on details. Not only because he made it his business to keep client’s secrets his secrets, but because she already appeared distressed enough.

“He’s safe now and I’ll make sure that he’ll never have to see these people again.” He told her. “He just opened the gifts Santa left for him and he and the other kids will have a great day today.”

Rey nodded, her eyes downcast. Withdrawing into herself.

He was about to interrupt her troublesome musings, when she looked up at him, curious expression on her face. In a quick movement, she got up and dropped onto the bed next to him, hands folded between her legs.

“But how do they afford you?” she asked, frowning.

He shrugged.

“These kinds of cases I do for free when there’s time.” he told her as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

“You do? Just like that?” Rey insisted and he was beginning to wonder what the big deal was. If she had any idea what he earned in an hour with the clients of the agency, she wouldn’t ask such questions.

“Yeah.” he shrugged again. “I mean… Toby just recited a Christmas poem, so that’s something, right?”

And then a smile grew on her face. Slowly and softly it lit up her eyes and she gave him a look of wonder and deep respect.

His heart grew three sizes and skipped a beat to top the reaction to that expression off. She appeared to be seeing him for the first time and her eyes focused on his face. They both sat there for a minute or two and he was beginning to blush from awkwardness.

“Well, should we…”

Rey leaned forward and before he knew what was happening, she had placed a small peck on his heated cheek before pulling him into an awkward hug.

“I’m glad Krampus didn’t come to get you in the end.” She told him, beaming at him like no one had smiled at him in ages. If ever. “You’re a great guy, Kylo.”

Uh… okay?!

“Thank- you?” he stuttered, trying to wrap his head around the fact that she had just kissed him without any real reason to do so.

“Let’s go down!” she chirped, still smiling that bright smile of hers and taking his hand in hers, dragging him up and out of the room.

On their way down the stairs they met Han and a quick look around the large room beneath them showed them that everyone was already up and about, holding mugs of coffee and chatting animatedly while Bing Crosby could be heard from one of the speakers.

“Morning, kids! Merry Christmas! I was just about to come and get you.” Han greeted them.

“Merry Christmas!” Rey cheered, still not letting go of Kylo’s hand.

“Merry Christmas, you two.” Leia greeted them as they arrived on the foot of the stairs, arms stretched out to hug them. Rey happily accepted the embrace first, grinning from ear to ear, before Kylo, too, bowed down to allow his mother to wrap her arms around his shoulders.

“Merry Christmas, Ben.” she breathed, placing a kiss on his yet unkissed cheek. He allowed the slip up to go by without a comment. It was Christmas!

Han threw an arm around his shoulder and led him towards the couch, Rey and Leia following while smiling happily at one another Luke. Luke, Chewie, Mally and Lando took their turns to wish them a Merry Christmas, whereas Luke did elect not to hug Kylo. Instead the two shook hands rather stiffly.

“Can we open our presents now?” Chewie asked, rubbing his hands. Mally giggled.

“You’re like a child!” she admonished, nudging her husband’s shoulder with her own, while Han laughed.

“Always has been.” He agreed, taking a seat next to his son, who couldn’t help but wonder what had happened to their argument. “Slept well, kid?” he asked out of the blue, patting Kylo on the shoulder warmly. Taken aback by the kind gesture, the younger Solo almost choked on his first coffee.

“Well enough, thanks.”

“Heard no reindeer this year?” Han asked, winking at him qith a broad smirk. Kylo rolled his eyes. That old story.

“Reindeer?” Lando wondered, having heard the whole exchange. Rey too seemed intrigued.

“I heard what I heard!” the young man insisted.

Han smirked and then filled Rey and Lando in on the joke. When he had been 7 years old, about to reach the age when most children finally understood that it was all a big hoax, his belief in Santa had been kept alive for another 2 Christmases by the simple fact that he had heard hoofs in the night before Christmas. He could have sworn that there had been reindeer, the sound of bells and a sleigh.

That night had done away with his doubts because when he crept down to have a look from the big window in the living-room, there had been tons of presents under the tree and the stockings that hung over the fireplace had been filled to the brim.

He had just heard Santa leave, or so 7 year old Ben Solo had thought. He probably had dreamt it all and the bells had been on his father’s old Santa hat.

Which was probably why the story amused his father until this very day.

Rey got up and sat next to him, hugging his biceps and leaning her head affectionately against his shoulder.

“When he says he heard reindeer and bells, then he heard reindeer and bells.” she told Han good-naturedly, causing the old man to grin.

“Whatever you’re doing to this one, kid, you’re doing it right. I could never get your mother to defend my delusions.”

“And with good reason, too!” Leia interrupted her husband dryly, causing everyone, including Kylo to snort. Rey was still snuggled against him. Moving his arm slightly, she let go with a puzzled look which soon morphed into relief when he placed his arm ‘round her shoulder to allow her to sit comfortable. She’d also be able to finish her tea like this. As his parents bickered playfully, his eyes fell on Luke, who had kept an eye on him and Rey, causing Kylo to sit just a little straighter, his bones rigid and awkward.

Rey, who must’ve noticed, sat up to search his gaze, resting her hand on his knee.

“Are you okay?” she asked softly, eyes still incredibly warm.

Ignoring the effect her orbs once more had on him, he simply nodded, patting her shoulder, eventually forcing his lips into a stiff travesty of a smile.

“Children!” Lando’s voice rose over those of his parents. “I think we’ve all heard enough.”

“More than enough.” Chewie agreed, raising his mug towards Lando for effectively getting Leia and Han to shut up. Good thing Rey got him a present. For this achievement alone the man was deserving of it.

“Oh, you just want to get to your presents, fuzzball!” Han snapped at his oldest friend, causing Chewie to laugh so loud that his beard was shaking.    

“You know me too well!” the man said, cheeks red. “But what can I say? I’ve been a good boy!”

“Is that so?” Mally wondered and at the shocked expression of her husband, stuck out her tongue at him.

“Alright, alright we get it, we’re all quite in love round here.” Luke sighed, getting up and walking towards the tree, grabbing a parcel and offered it to his sister. “Merry Christmas, Leia.”

And thus it started. They all gathered around the tree and presented each other with the gifts they had gotten for each other.

“Rey, dear? This is from Han and me.” Leia said, approaching Rey with a rather large parcel. Next to him, she gaped at the sheer size and blushed. Turning her rather conflicted gaze up at Kylo, he reassuringly touched the middle of her back and moved past her.

“Rey and I got this for you and dad. But I think Rey has something else for you, mother.” Kylo explained, handing over the two presents –a bottle of 30 year old Scotch and an antique brooch from the 18 hundreds.

“Uhm yes…” Rey breathed, adorably embarrassed and made to rush around the tree when she halted. “Kylo… where did you…?”

Oh yeah, he had taken care of it.

“You didn’t roll it, did you?” she sounded panicked.

“Of course not, come on.” he led her around the tree. “I placed it in yesterday’s newspaper before I came up this morning.” he whispered and the young woman gave a sigh of great relief.

Almost shyly, Rey approached Leia, holding the old paper in both her hands.

“Merry Christmas Leia… It’s between the pages.” she explained.

“Thank you, love!”

In a pleading manner, the young woman looked over her shoulder in his direction and in two steps he was next to her. A little amused, he realized that she was fidgeting, kneading her fingers in a nervous fashion. Before she could break one, he decided to reach out and take on of her hands in his own.

Leia opened the newspaper and…

“Oh, Rey… Han, come and look! Sweetest, did you do that? Look what Rey made for me.” his mother babbled, excitedly, eyes moving over the image slowly.

Youth had returned to her face for a moment, her smile easy, carefree and just happy. Holding the portrait in both hands now, the older woman finally looked up at Rey.

“This is wonderful, Rey, thank you so much, I love it.” she took a step towards Rey and –not parting with the picture despite Han’s attempts to take it from her– wrapped the other woman in a tight embrace, warm smile never even faltering. “Thank you!”

“Let me have a better look.” Han urged, putting an arm around Leia’s shoulder, who adoringly held the picture in a way that both of them could see it.

“Looks just like him, doesn’t it?” Leia said, her voice loving.

The whole exchange dragged on and on in his perception, his mother’s reaction taking him completely by surprise. Not quite sure how to act right now, he bit his lip, before he have his and Rey’s entwined hands a little shake, gaining her attention.

“Open your present, now, hm?” he suggested.

She nodded, but before turning back to the couch where she had placed the large gift, she told him in a victorious voice:

“I told you she’d like this better than a landscape.” With that she turned her whole attention to unwrapping her own gift with delicate tugs so she wouldn’t ruin the paper.

“You thought I’d prefer a landscape?” Leia’s voice distracted him and his eyes left Rey’s cautious hands. Turning towards his mother he realized that she still held onto his portrait for dear life while Han still examined it.

Slightly embarrassed, Kylo shrugged.

“You’ve got hundreds of photographs with me on them.” he argued weakly, a feeling of unease rising in him.

“That’s not the same. And Rey did such a wonderful job, too.”

“I’m not saying she didn’t! Though she did make me more handsome.” Kylo argued and Rey stopped in her unwrapping to snap a displeased “Hey!” at him.

“He’s kinda right!” Han mumbled and Leia tsk’ed.

“What do you know about anything? Look at him!”

“He looks a lot more healthy on this than he does now… Sorry, kid, but you ought to sleep more.”

“He looks fine!” both Rey and Leia argued in one voice.

“It is clear that her gaze is biased, which is fine, but…”

“Oh, shut up, Han!” Leia interrupted, walking up to Rey to watch as she finally got rid of the paper.

“Don’t argue now, kid. There is no winning at this point.” Han told his son and despite himself, Kylo felt himself smile slightly at his father.

“You’re idiots. Both of you!” Leia told them in no uncertain terms, causing Rey to snort and then quickly advert her eyes.

“Are we now? This is where we get our presents out, kid!” Han announced, slapping him on the back with a broad smirk on his face.

 

* * *

 

She was nervous. Or excited. Rey wasn’t really sure what made her tummy feel heavy and light at the same time, just that she was agitated. As Leia reached her side, she hesitated before lifting the lid of the pretty box that she had found beneath the paper.   
  
“Go on, dear. I want to know whether I managed to pick correctly.” the older woman encouraged her.   
  
The lid came away and there, neatly placed in the box was the dream of every poor art student. Atop of a large sketchbook rested a smaller one. Next to that was a case of 12 new graphite pens as well as a lovely set of Aquarelle pencils and indeed quite a few more things that she really didn’t have the peace of mind to fully register right now. The sight itself took her breath away. Everything was of a much higher quality than she usually could afford. She knew those brands, she had stared at their supplies often enough when buying her much, much cheaper pencils and paper.   
  
The young woman only realized time had passed and that she had spent said time by just staring at the contents of her present, when Leia placed a soft hand on her shoulder leaning down to search her eyes.   
  
“Did I choose the wrong things? We can go back to the shop and exchange them for something proper. The young lady who helped me, assured me that this would not be an issue.” she said in a gentle voice, but Rey began to start shaking her head violently.   
  
“No! No, this is wonderful, I just…” What could she say? This was too much. Far too much!   
  
“You like it then?” Han inquired, coming to stand behind Leia.   
  
“Yes! Thank you. Both of you. But…” she insisted, nodding her head. “This is just so much, too much, I mean I…”   
  
“You are welcome!” Han said joyfully, thus putting an end to the matter.   
  
“I am glad you like it.” Leia added and pulled Rey into a hug.   
  
Turning around, she saw Kylo standing by the tree and she quickly rushed over to grab the little gifts she had bought for him and approached, holding it out for him to take.   
  
“Merry Christmas, Kylo!” she said, biting her lower lip, still nervous.   
  
“Merry Christmas, Rey.” he replied and gifts changed hands.   
  
Before she began unwrapping her own present –which was blessedly much smaller than the one she had received from Leia and Han– she took the time to watch him open the small box.   
At first, he just looked at the contents for a moment before chuckling.   
  
“How did you know?” he asked, slowly looking up to grin at her.   
  
“Your uncle told me the story of how you defended Santa’s honour.” she said, winking at him with a grin. “And I thought it was really… ah… chivalrous of you.”   
  
“Hence the knight?” he commented, lifting the tiny brass figure of a knight out of the box and held it between his fingers for a moment.   
  
“The knight of coals.” at her comment, he chuckled once more.     
  
“Sir Soot.” he added, making her laugh. “It’s a very sweet gift, Rey, thank you.”   
  
Still feeling his uncle’s gaze on them, he took a step forward and placed a quick kiss on Rey’s forehead that may have come in with a bit too much force, for her head was pushed back by it.

“Open yours.” He told her sheepishly gesturing towards the small box in her hand.

“Oh… certainly!”

Satisfied that he had liked his gifts, she tore back the paper just as delicately as before. Rey planned to rewrap every present and savour the moment of unpacking once more when at home. She had gone without unwrapping gifts for so long, she surely could be excused for being so silly as to do it twice this year.

Smiling softly, she wondered what it might be. It couldn’t be anything she could use for her art, it was far too small to be a set of brushes or pencils. A book was pretty much out of the question as well, given the rectangular shape.

Finally, the paper came away and inside was… jewellery case?

Her eyes flew up to meet his, puzzled.

“What…”  

He had shoved his hands into his pockets, looking a bit sheepish.

“It’s uhm… I thought it might keep you from sleeping on the floor to watch the snow.” he mumbled. “You can open it.”

Her jaw had dropped and she only realized it when he urged her to open her gift. With numb fingers, she slowly opened the box.

There, on black satin, rested a rose-gold necklace with a pendant in shape of a snow-crystal.

She did not hear Leia hugging Han and thanking him for her present, nor did she register Kylo giving her a worried look. Her ears were ringing and she felt numb, with a heavy lump forming in her throat.

The helpless look he sent Leia while Rey kept staring holes into her present completely passed her by, as did the older woman’s rush to hurry over to find out what might be the matter.

Too much. This was too much.

It was beautiful.

Easily the most beautiful thing she had ever received or owned for that matter.

Would she have to give it back?

It was beautiful, but could she allow herself to adore it when she might have to part with it again? Surely he was just giving this –something that obviously had cost him more than the $20 she had spent on the chocolate and the little knight– as a cover-up.

Nobody would ever gift anything like this to her, let alone someone she had only met a few times.

She was Rey.

Poor, orphaned Rey.

The lump grew, pressing tears into her eyes. Goodness, she couldn’t… Not with everyone watching.

Finally, she registered her name to be spoken repeatedly by more than one voice and with increasing urgency.

“Excuse me.” she muttered, voice brittle.  

Without another word she quickly walked up the stairs that lead to the second floor, Kylo’s flabbergasted calls falling on deaf ears.   


	11. When the Snow Lay Round About Deep and Crisp and You in It

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once more; Praise to my lovely readers. I am sorry this took so long, I struggled a bit  
> with... a part I shall not give away ;)  
> Thank you all for your sweet and ecouraging comments, the kudos and just being generally awesome  
> human beings!  
> Given that this story has reached over 500 kudos with the last chapter, I made a little aesthetic. Hope you'll  
> enjoy it.

[](https://imgbb.com/)

Chapter 11

Rey held her phone in a tight grip while the little box rested awkwardly next to her on the bed like an apologetic boyfriend who had made advances that had been rejected. She was staring at the pictures she had received. Her friends had also sent her a voice message, singing a Christmas carol.It would have made her laugh in any other situation. Finn, while not lacking enthusiasm, was a horrible singer.

New tears ran down her face. Those were her friends. She could’ve been with them instead of finding herself in the middle of emotional turmoil. There was but one of her friends who would probably understand the situation.

She was in the process of typing a message to Paige, when she realized that the girl would probably not be able to talk without Finn and Rose realizing it was her, demanding to speak with her and she was quite sure that her voice still drowned in yet unshed tears.

Deleting the message, she pressed the phone to her ear, listening to the waiting signal before the call was finally accepted.

“Rey, what’s wrong?” Maz’ voice greeted her with no digress.

“He got me a present!” it erupted from her along with a new stream of hot tears. “I only slept on the ground one time and it was an accident and it wasn’t so bad because the blanket is really thick and soft and the long bath I took when he suggested it, really helped, but now he got me a snowflake made of gold. He can’t do that, can he? I feel so stupid, because all I got him was stupid–“ she rambled in a frantic voice, her thoughts jumbled together and in a rush to leave her mouth.

“Stop!” the other woman’s raspy voice interrupted. “He makes you sleep on the floor?”

“No!” Rey replied a bit too violently, distressed over the fact that _her madam_ was missing the entire point of her dismay –that’s what Maz was, God damn it, no matter how much Paige, Kylo and her had tiptoed around that word! “He gave me the bed, he’s sleeping on the couch. I fell asleep on the floor while watching the falling snow!”

“That’s the most adorable thing I heard all year.” the older woman stated, like this was the part of Rey’s tale that was of importance. Why wouldn’t she understand what the real issue was? “But you should not sleep on the floor, honey!”

“Maz!” Rey snapped, needing the other woman to focus. The girl had spent the first two weeks in the US by sleeping on a thin mattress because the Plutts had not been able to find a bed they had esteemed cheap enough. This was not such a big deal! Especially not big enough to get her a necklace!

“Rey, sweety, I don’t see what the issue is here. If you don’t like the necklace, I am certain you can sell it once the job is done. Just smile and pretend to love it, he’ll never know now, will he?”

 _Sell it?_ , Rey thought, all air being knocked out of her. That sounded just wrong. Opening the box and placing it in her lap, she glanced down at the shiny object.

“It’s easily the nicest thing I was ever given.”

“Then I’m confused.” Maz said dryly.

Rey sighed.

“Should I offer it back to him? I mean he is paying so much money already and his mom got me those great gifts, too and–“

“Oh my, Leia must really love you! I thought you two might click, I so adore being right!” the other woman sounded absolutely delighted.

“This is not the issue, I–“

“Rey.” Maz silenced her and finally Rey realized that she had stopped crying, wiping at her wet face. “Calm down. You are under no obligation to give the present back. You may offer, but I am sure it didn’t even cross his mind. It is the client’s choice to get you presents if he so pleases and just returning them would be incredibly rude. Unless he got it to persuade you to go further than I allow?”

“What? No!” the girl defended Kylo.

“I didn’t think so. Now, I got my own presents to unwrap.”

“Maz?” her voice sounded rather embarrassed. “I was wondering… would it be against the contract if I were to offer sharing the bed? Strictly for sleeping of course? I feel bad that he has to sleep on the couch when we could both fit in here without even touching.”

There was a pause and a _Hm_.

“Strictly for sleeping?” came the question.

“Strictly for sleeping!”

“… If you feel comfortable with that… Solos tend to be terribly irritable when they didn’t get proper rest, believe me, I know what I’m talking about. But no cuddling beneath the waistline!”

“Is that what the kids call it these days?” Rey asked with a small smile on her face.

“How would I know? Aren’t you supposed to be the kid?” Maz chuckled. “Get back down there. Merry Christmas, Rey.”

There was a knock on the door, causing Rey to jump. Her heart became heavy and she swallowed the burning lump in her throat.

“Merry Christmas.” the girl mumbled when Kylo stepped in before quickly closing the door behind him.

She opened her mouth to apologize for her behaviour, but never got to utter a single syllable.

 

* * *

 

Of all the reactions he might have expected; this had not been it!

His mother had stood next to him, one reassuring hand on his biceps. Han sighed.

“You didn’t get her the same thing for her birthday, r–“ he began when Leia’s stern glare caused him to shut up. Luke sat down next to Lando, frowning. A tiny, soft hand seized his own.

“I am so sorry, this is all my fault, I insisted you get her something.” she apologized and while –yes! This was indeed a fact– he found himself shaking his head.

“No, I… I… I’ll go talk to her.” he said and made to step forward.

“Give her a moment, Ben.” Leia advised in a soothing tone of voice.

“Your mother is right, son. Give her five minutes to cool off.” came Han’s voice. “Try to figure out what you did wrong and think of an appropriate apology for every scenario –What?” Lando had started to shake his head, whereas Kylo and Leia had just stared at the man.

“How are the two of you still married?” Lando wondered incredulously, face disappearing in his palm.

“I keep wondering the same thing.” Leia weighted in.

“Not too late to run away together, just saying.” he offered, dark eyes twinkling.

Kylo rolled his eyes and sat back down, keeping an eye on the clock on the wall. When 10 minutes were over and Rey had yet to return, he got up, registering Leia’s eyes following his every movement.

“Be gentle, sweety. Maybe she simply missed her family. It is a hard time to be away from home this time of year.”

His mother’s voice was pure kindness. Didn’t he know though? He had been away from home for many Christmases, not that it mattered. The peculiar look his father gave him had Kylo walk up the steps a bit faster.

When he entered the room, the girl terminated a phone call, her eyes wide with apprehension and… red. She had been crying. Her lips parted to say something, but he beat her to it.

“Is the necklace that bad?” he wondered, because he was incapable of comprehending what else might have been amiss.

Maybe his taste in jewellery was truly that abominable.

To his complete surprise, she gave a very unladylike snort.

“No. It’s beautiful.” Rey complimented in a small voice. “I am sorry. I’ll come back down with you right away, apologize to everyone.”

“We should wait a few moments.” he sighed, sitting down in one of the soft chairs. Her eyes were still puffy and the corners of her nose were red. While he didn’t understand what was wrong, he’d have to be a prize idiot to not see that something was very much not right. “You cried.”

…he actually might have been a prize idiot all along now that he listened to himself!

“I was stupid, sorry. It won’t happen again.” she forced a smile onto her face. It looked wrong and fake and painful and it made him furious.

“Rey.” he snapped, causing her to flinch.

 _Good going_ , he thought, accepting his idiot status graciously.

He sighed, leaning his elbows on his spread legs, fingers brushing his hair back.

Once more with feeling.

“Tell me why you are sad.”

Leaning back up, his eyes and hers held one another for a second or five. When she realized that their gazes were locked and that he was serious about being told what had been wrong, she glanced away.

“It’s stupid.”

“Please.” Was that really his voice? He sounded so gentle. Usually he reserved that kind of voice for frightened clients who were very young. “What did I do wrong?”

When she remained silent, biting her lip, he leaned a bit closer to her.

“Maybe it’ll help not making the same mistake again when I bring home a real girlfriend.”

That actually brought a short laugh out of her and he felt victorious.

“You did nothing wrong. It’s me, being silly.” After a short pause, she shot an insecure glance at him. “You can… I am not really your girlfriend, so keeping the necklace would feel wrong and–“

“You really don’t like it!” he called out, but she only shook her head.

“It is too much. The necklace is gorgeous and perfect and I am–“ she sighed, taking hold of the little box. “I got you some chocolate and a brass knight.” the girl rambled unhappily.

He got up then.

Without a word he took one step forward, grabbed the box from Rey and looked down at the girl.

“Stand.”

 

* * *

 

Rey nodded and made to walk past him and towards the door with a heavy feeling.

It was better this way!

She couldn’t fill him in, it would be wrong. He paid her and was under no obligation to listen to her sad childhood story. It’d ruin his day more than she had already done up to this point. Cursing herself for being so stupid, she bit back new tears.

His hand was warm and gentle when it closed around her wrist.

“Stand still, will you?”

The box was tossed carelessly onto the bed.

Warm fingers brushed the nape of her neck while he placed her hair over her shoulder, the cool material of the pendant settling just beneath her collarbone.

A large, reassuring hand was placed on her back. It’s warmth spread, causing her own skin to heaten up and brought colour to her cheeks.

“Let’s see…” he said with a soft voice as he gently nudged her to face him. When hers met those dark eyes, she immediately averted her gaze. He was warm and close and she was unable to move on her own. Letting herself be positioned to his liking, her free shoulder was also cupped by one of his hands. “Beautiful… It suits you. Would you like to see?” he inquired kindly.

Rey didn’t know what to do.

Her heart felt hot and heavy beneath her skin. Caressing her from within, lulling her in as his thumbs rubbed circles into her shoulder.

“Rey?”

He wanted her to have this.

She was welcome to keep it.

Just like that.

He was a stranger, almost. So were Leia and Han.

Yet they had been nothing but kind, gracious and welcoming. As if she belonged there with them. Without so much as a second thought.

It was nice and painful at the same time.  

Her throat had tightened while she had been too focussed on the warm, slightly tickling sensation inside of her chest. His warmth had invaded her, his grip keeping her in place as he towered over her. She only realized it when he asked:

“Why are you crying?”

Kylo stepped back to give her space and she panicked before she could question as to why it made her want to reach out and hold him close.

“This is my second real Christmas.” she sobbed, her confession being washed out of her like a stain. The hands on her shoulder twitched like she was the one burning him.

“What do you mean?” he grasped the hand that had come up to hide her face, pulling it away with little to no force. “Rey?”

“The orphanage… it was okay, but…” her voice kept disappointing her by failing and breaking off into violent sobs again and again. “It was never like this.” she hurried to explain. “Nothing has ever been like this.”

She was breaking down in front of a man who was practically a stranger and she didn’t even possess the mental stability to register that. It would come. Later.

The urge to be held seized her and she flung her arms around herself, one hand grasping at her side while the other was clutching at her shoulder, next to one of Kylo’s hands.

Making to turn away to hide in the bathroom, she let out a wet sob when she was instead pulled into his chest. Gently, but abruptly, his arms slid around her, hands on her back and the nape of her neck.

“Tell me.” Rey heard his voice, the request spoken tenderly, but allowing no argument. “Tell me all.”

And she did; about the orphanage and its loneliness, about the Plutts and being forced to work for the tiniest morsels of food, about her parents and having loved them while having been incredibly scared of them at the same time. She told him all, the words spilling out of her along with an seemingly endless stream of new tears.   

 

* * *

 

At some point her fingers had buried into the fabric of his sweater. Gradually, that grip loosened as he held her close, listening.

Eventually, he sat her on the bed and joined her there. Her eyes were swollen and red. With a hand resting on her back, he watched her face for a second as she cried her heart out. Sobs were becoming softer until finally, she had calmed down.

“Is that Plutt guy still bothering you?” he asked in a hushed tone.

Rey sniffled.

“I changed my number and he doesn’t have my address. But he called the university’s office twice now. Lucky enough, nobody told him anything…” she broke off, wiping at her face, not looking at him. “It’s not important.”

“Rey…” he leaned closer. When she wouldn’t look at him, her hazel eyes focused onto an invisible point, he made to reach for her face, hesitated, hand hovering in mid air. When she once more didn’t react to her name being spoken, he cautiously touched the side of her jaw with the tips of his fingers. Her whole body gave a startled jerk and their eyes found one another. His fingers were now hanging in mid air, the heat of her soft skin lingering. “If he does anything like that again, no matter how much time has passed after our time together, I want you to call me.”

She made to shake her head and look away, only to the effect that her face pressed into his open palm.

“I mean it, Rey.”

Her eyes closed, as she nodded.

“Promise me, Rey.” he urged, turning her face towards him. Her cheeks were red, either from crying or misplaced embarrassment he had no way of telling. The freckles on her skin created little constellations. A tiny galaxy fit in her pretty little face.

He would rather not think about what kind of vile creature would mistreat someone this precious. The thought was there and this time, he didn’t even shrink away from it, too occupied with making her feel safe.

“I promise.” she conceded after a short pause.

Caressing her cheek with his thumb before letting go of her face, he gave her a small smile.

“Good. I’ll take care of it for you.” he assured her and never did he mean those words like today. Rey had been left on her own too many times in the past. It was true that their contract would end on the 28th, but he’d be damned if he was one of the many, many people who would prove to fail her. The way that their acquaintance had come about was by no means ideal. But she was a sweet girl who needed help. Help that she’d receive whenever she came to ask it of him.

New tears ran down her face, but this time, she searched his gaze.

“Why?”

This question saddened him. Especially because he too was incapable to consider assistance something that came natural. Snoke had taught him that people only offered help when they had ulterior motives. Which most of the time was true, of course. Their clients paid them, partners took work off each other’s shoulders to gain each other’s favour. He had worked long hours so he’d make himself irreplaceable.

But this here, this was a diversion of the rule.

Or was it?

Kylo had the sneaking feeling that now he knew what kind of life Rey had been living and what kind of vermin was after her, he’d not have a peaceful night’s rest ever again unless he knew that she’d get the help she needed to get rid of her foster father.

Why it bothered him so, he couldn’t decide.

It had shocked him, yes. During the short time spent with her, Rey had been a constant source of joy and vivaciousness. Had he not been informed about any of this, had he met her in some bar, he would’ve been certain that she must’ve had a happy childhood. On the surface, she was all smiles and sunshine. He hated that it was but a mask.

This, he could not tell her.

She might think of him as shallow and he really didn’t want her to think ill of him.

So he simply smiled at her, softly he hoped, and took one of her hands in his.

“I somehow have to earn Sir Soot, don’t I?”

Her laughter was short and more of a hiccup than anything else. But he was rather glad to hear it anyway.

After a few more minutes, she excused herself and rushed into the bathroom. When she emerged again, her face looked clean and her eyes were less puffy.

“Are you alright?” he asked and got to his feet, hands in his back pockets as she approached.

She was warm as she pressed her body against him, slender arms pulling him into a tight hug. Before he could think, one of his arms had flung itself around her middle, while his other hand cupped the back of her head, holding her close.

“Thank you.” Rey breathed into his chest, squeezing him a little bit tighter.

“Don’t mention it.”

“No!” she stood back and now the expression of her eyes was completely altered. In them he found conviction and strength and it was glorious. This before him, was a beautiful sight and he’d not deserve it if he failed to treat it with the reverence it deserved. He didn’t so much as blink, afraid of missing a single moment of this expression. “You have been so kind and patient. I am probably the worst escort in history. Every other man would’ve sent me home by now, but you… this is really not what I expected before coming here. I will not let you down again.”

Her voice was strong and every word was spoken with such gravitas that he’d believe everything that left her pretty lips.

“You’re the best escort I ever had.” he joked, smirking down at her.

The little pout she gave at his playful tone did away with her seriousness and she poked him in the side, causing him to laugh at her attempt to tickle him.

When Kylo and Rey returned into the living room, everyone had already finished breakfast, but Leia rushed downstairs to fetch some of the pancakes she had saved for them. Rey followed her to help out somehow. The young woman had had perfectly good reasons to be overwhelmed, yet she still appeared to feel like she had to offer some form of retribution. Where he was considered, she ought not to beat herself up, but if it made herself feel better, who was he to argue?

Dropping into a seat at the table, Lando and Han joined him.

“Everything okay?” Han inquired and Kylo nodded. “That’s good. You didn’t have a fight, did you?”

“No.” he answered rather shortly and without explanation. It felt wrong to fill Han in when he could not be sure that Rey would be comfortable about it.

“Lando, Chewie and I were going to get some work done on the Falcon later. Wanna join in?”

Kylo snorted.

“You’re still working on that piece of junk?”

“Hey, you owe that piece of junk your existence, kid.” Han told him, amused twinkle in his eye. He hated it when someone spoke ill of that antique car and Kylo knew it. Still, the reminder as to where exactly he had been conceived had been entirely uncalled for.

“Which is why I’ll never come near those backseats ever again.” the young man said, shuddering and Lando laughed along with Han.

“Can’t blame the boy.” Lando nodded.

“I replaced the seats since then!” his father argued.

“When?” Kylo heard himself wonder and Han’s face lit up at his interest.

“Four years ago. I got quite a lot of work done. Exchanged parts of the engine too, made it faster.”

“I’ll ask Rey. Maybe we’ll come and have a look.”

“Good, good.” for some reason his father looked a little bit younger now. Eager to get to work, probably.

“Ben?” came a voice from his left. Luke had entered the room.

He did not acknowledge his uncle. If Skywalker was incapable of remembering the name he went by these days, he saw no reason to be civil to the man who had almost cost him his diploma.

Crossing his arms in front of his chest as Luke joined them at the table, he realized that Han was frowning at his old friend.

“How long did you say you and Rey were in a relationship now?”

“Luke…” Han tried to interrupt, his voice carrying a soft warning, which confused Kylo.

“Four months give or take a few days. Why?”

Luke nodded slowly and, ignoring Lando patting him on the shoulder and the man’s good natured ‘Let it go, Luke.’, he continued.

“And she does what again? She studies art, yes?”

Frowning, Kylo confirmed this, adding that Rey also worked part time at a coffeehouse. Both of them had agreed that the less they would lie, the better. It’d be easier to stick to the parts that weren’t true.

“Is she pregnant?”

“Excuse me?” Kylo snapped, baffled.

“Luke, that’s enough.” Han growled.

“Was the girl expecting a ring in that box? Is this the reason she started to cry?”

His jaw might’ve dropped if he wasn’t clenching his teeth at this point, fury rising up in him.

“Think I’m too stupid to fuck a girl without getting her pregnant now, yes?” he growled, fists clenched and not giving a damn about what kind of language was usually deemed acceptable in this house.

“That’s not what I said, Ben.”

He made to open his mouth to yell at the old fool, but his father’s fist beat him to it. The impact on the wooden table-top caused the vase to wobble slightly, the sound loud in the room.

“I told you before; enough!” Han growled, glaring at his brother-in-law. “The girl is a guest in my house and for once in your life, you will keep your mouth shut.”

Luke made to say something, but Lando got up, clapped the other man on the shoulder and told him to come and ‘walk it off’.

Father and son were alone after a few moments.

“What the fuck was that about?” Kylo bit out in an attempt not to raise his voice.

“Your uncle has gotten it into his mind that Rey and you are being terribly _weird_ ” here he made air-quotes and rolled his eyes, “around each other. So he came up with the idea that she might be pregnant and now wants you to marry her so her and the baby will be provided for… Skywalker delusions. Next thing he’ll conjure up is how she planned on getting pregnant to get her hands on your money.” the older man spat in distaste, then his eyes sheepishly settled on Kylo. “Sorry, kiddo. For not finding you saner relatives.”  

Kylo sat there, rather stunned.

This time, his jaw did drop.

For more reasons than one.

“She… had wine last night.” he stated rather dumbly. “I wouldn’t pour her a glass of wine if she were pregnant!”

Had his father just defended him?

Was this what had just happened? It seemed like it, to be sure!

“Your mother pointed out the same, excellent, point.” Han told him with a smirk, then shrugged with a sigh. “Don’t mind him, kid. He worries and cares and sucks at both.”

“Huh…”

 

* * *

 

After breakfast, Rey and Kylo had joined Han and the other men in the garage, where they had worked on an old Camaro. The old car had earned a critical glance from Rey. To her, it looked like it might be in danger of falling apart any second now. Han insisted that the Falcon was the fastest and most dependable car he had ever driven, but she was less than convinced.

It had surprised her that Kylo appeared to know his way around engines, asking questions and making comments and even checking a few things for himself.

Keeping an eye on both Solo men, Rey couldn’t help but smile when she realized how happy Han looked. There was an air of unwilling enthusiasm about Kylo’s demeanour, like he really didn’t like the idea of enjoying himself, yet couldn’t avoid it.

He had waved her over often, made sure that she wasn’t bored, explained things to her and had asked her opinion. Rey had told him about how she had been forced to work on Plutt’s scrap yard for years to earn her keep. Obviously, that meant that she wasn’t incapable of understanding engines, though it had been on rare occasions that she saw a machine this lovingly kept in shape.

When Chewie and Han began bickering about the newest adjustments, Kylo placed a hand on Rey’s shoulder and jerked his head towards the exit. He assured her that from here on, their argument would only get louder and she had laughed.

They had brunch at 12, during which he had suggested they go out for her first lesson and she had nodded her head. It would be great to get out and be in the snow.

“Mind if we tag along?” Lando asked, gesturing towards himself, Leia, Luke and Mally. “We were just talking about going out.”

It was settled then, though Kylo kept glaring daggers at Luke. Why, she didn’t know, but the man also received a stern look from his sister. Nobody commented on it though, so she held her peace.

A short car ride later, Rey beamed up at the cool, blue, sky as they walked through the snow towards the ski-lifts. She was excited about this whole new experience, shouldering the snowboard Kylo had used as a teenager, while cool wind blew into her face. The cold, fresh air felt wonderful in her lungs and she grinned happily. While Rey had eagerly eyed the lifts, she heard an amused chuckle.

Turning towards Kylo, she blinked in confusion and asked what might have been so funny.

“We’re not going up there yet.” he informed her, pleasant smile on his face.

“What? Why?” Rey heard herself ask, feeling disappointed.

“We are going…” he gently took hold of her shoulders and turned her slightly so she was facing an area where children, but also a few adults were slowly getting a hang of winter sports. A group of tiny children followed a tall man in a perfectly straight line on skis, while a teenager unceremoniously landed on their ass as they failed to make a turn with their snowboard. “…there. Got to make sure you know how to stop properly, before I take you up there.”

“Ben is right, Rey.” Leia consoled gently. “We’ll see you two later. Meet up at the hut around three thirty?” she asked her son hopefully.

“If we’re late, wait for us.” he nodded his approval. “I’m sure Rey will need some mulled wine by then.”  

Here he appeared to glare again at Luke, who was quick to avert his gaze. Now she was confused.

“What was that all about?” she inquired as they walked over to the training hill.

“He thinks you’re pregnant.” Kylo informed her, rolling his eyes, while re-adjusting the red scarf that contrasted wonderfully with his all-black attire.

“What gave him that idea?” she gasped incredulously. She knew for a fact that she surely didn’t look pregnant.

“Don’t question it. He is insane, is what he is.” The tall man mumbled, sending a long-distance glare towards the ski-lifts where his family was waiting in line.

Not wanting him to get more upset, she contained her curiosity. As they approached the hill, he stopped her.

“You’re right-handed?” when she nodded, he gestured for her to place the board in the snow. “Get your right foot in first. It’ll be your leading foot, so get it in the binding. We’ll start by sliding a bit.”

He showed her what they were going to do, pushing himself off with his left foot and sliding a few metres away from her, before turning in a swift movement that looked easy to do when he did it.

“Now follow.”

It was not as easy as it had looked! The board slid away rather awkwardly and she quickly placed her left foot on the concrete once more.

“Try to keep your back straight and balance your weight on both legs. Not too much pressure on either leg.” he called helpfully and she nodded.

It worked far better this time and she slowly made her way through the snow towards him. This they did for a few minutes until she could keep up with him.

“Good. When you kick yourself off next, I want you to slide a bit and then lean slightly back on your heels. That’s how you stop.” Once more he demonstrated and Rey was eager to copy him. In theory it was easy, but she failed to do it correctly for a few minutes. He watched patiently and suggested ways for her to do it more efficiently and finally!, she stopped when she meant to.

“Fine. Now we’ll try this while going down the hill. Come on.”

He kicked himself off and sped through the snow. She grinned after him as she imitated his movements, quite aware of the fact that she cut a much less graceful figure than he did. When arriving at the foot of the slope they were going to tackle, he waited for her and she eagerly leaned down to undo the bindings of her right foot.

“No, keep it on.” he instructed, grinning. “You go up like this.”

Kylo walked up with his left foot, pulled his right foot after him, buried the edge of the board in the snow and took another step forward.

She almost landed on her nose when losing her balance but shook it off quickly before he noticed, unwilling to look like an idiot.

It turned out, that she needn’t have worried, because she managed to do just that a few moments later when she landed on her ass after she had leaned back just a little bit too much.

“Let’ try that again, shall we?”

He had been over her immediately, reaching down to help her up.

“Thanks.” she huffed, blushing. Little kids could do this, as evidenced by the group of four-year olds racing past them on tiny skis. She, a grown woman could not and would not be defeated by a bit of snow and some board.

Falling, so it seemed, was a natural part of learning though, because by the end of the next 20 minutes her behind hurt. Who knew snow could be anything but soft and cushiony? Finally, she leaned back just the right amount so that she neither fell back, nor was she startled by suddenly bending into a curve to the left.

Throwing her arms into the air, the frozen muscles of her face hurting when she strained them into a wide smile, she turned towards Kylo.

“I’m standing!” she cheered and even though Rey was several metres away from him she was sure that she had heard his snort before he raised his hands to slow-clap. He said something, but she didn’t catch it. “What?”

Once more he spoke, but didn’t bother to raise his voice, so she turned around and was on her merry way back to him, determined to repeat her success.

“I didn’t catch that!” she informed him while limping up the hill.

His smirk was rather cocky as he nodded towards her left foot.

“Now with both feet in the binding.”

And back on her ass she went the next time she tried to stop. Lucky for her, she had him there with her to pull her up every single time.

“I suck!” she exclaimed, punching the snow with her gloved fist before accepting his outstretched hand after 15 minutes.

“Bullshit. I couldn’t sit down for dinner after my first attempts, remember?”

“Makes perfect sense to me at this point!” she grumped, more angry with herself than with his teaching methods. Kylo was a fine teacher, she was certain. It was all her fault.

“You won’t have any issues with taking curves later. Just remember to… Stand straight for me now, yeah?”

Not sure what he’d do, she did as asked, both feet still in their bindings as he stepped out of his, walked around her and came to stand at her back.

“Lean back for me.” he encouraged, one hand on her hip, the other on her shoulder. “I’ve got you.” he assured her quietly as she bit her lower lip. She leaned back and he stopped her at a certain point, his body and arms holding her in place securely. “Until here. Not further. This will suffice.”

She could feel his breath against her ear as he held her in the snow.

“Wanna try again?” came the question as she began to register how firm he felt, not budging a single inch as her weight rested against him.

“Yeah…” she answered in a rather breathy voice.

“That’s my girl.” he praised and with a push, which didn’t seem to take any effort on his part, he placed her on her feet again. Rey’s face had heated up by this point and she prayed that the cool air had reddened her cheeks anyway so her blush would not be evident.

After another half an hour she had succeeded at stopping without falling either on her ass or her knees. Curves were coming along fine, but he pointed out that the hill wasn’t steep enough to really practise.

“Feeling ready to go up there? We won’t go all the way down today, but there it a hut around halfway up where we’ll meet the others in around an hour.”

“You think I’m ready?” she wondered and he shrugged.

“If you take longer it won’t be so bad. Only takes time off the hours I have to suffer Luke’s presence.” he mumbled and she grinned up at him.

“I still can’t believe he thinks I’m pregnant.” she commented, shaking her head without any bad feelings towards Luke. The young woman was more surprised than bothered.

“He makes himself believe things whether they are true or not, with a complete disregard of the consequences.” Kylo informed her darkly.

“… would you like to talk about it?” she awkwardly offered to listen.

The sigh that left him sounded tired.

“Doesn’t really matter now, but he withdrew my diploma from his school when the course during my time at university did not suit him.” he explained. “I almost lost my place in the programme I had hoped to participate in due to that. Had it not been for my boss, he would not have budged and I would’ve gotten kicked out of university.”

Rey couldn’t help but stare.

“What?”

That… didn’t sound like Luke at all! Of course the very idea that she was with child was ridiculous, but to foil his nephew’s future like that was a different story.

“Is that why you broke it off with your family?” she asked, understanding his motives a lot better now. Everyone had been so kind and while she had realized that his job was a delicate topic in their conversations, she had not thought any of Kylo’s family to be scheming against their son and nephew like that.

“That and their general attitude towards the whole matter and their unwillingness to have my back because ‘ _Uncle Luke wouldn’t do something like that!_ ’.” he mimicked his mother’s voice.

Rey bit her lower lip.

This was bad.

“Sorry.” she mumbled.

“What are you apologizing for? You didn’t call me a liar!” he said rather gruffly.

But he seemed to be far away, focused on the things that had gone so dreadfully wrong. Rey, who never had had a family to let her down, felt helpless, wrecking her brain as to what she might say or do to calm him, cheer him up.

She couldn’t allow him to meet them in such a mood.

At a complete loss, she reached out her hand and took his.

“I could spill some wine over his trousers later.” she offered insecurely and to her surprise, he chuckled.

“Try to aim for his crotch.” he told her, grinning, squeezing her smaller hand.

 

* * *

 

Poor thing.

As they arrived up on the mountain, her expression betrayed how intimidated she felt. There were more people up here, people who knew what they were doing. She kept close to him as they walked towards the ski run.

His former discontent had vanished by the time they had stepped off the lift. Rey’s eyes had taken in the view, a bright smile on her face the whole ride as they floated over pine trees and an endless amount of white, fresh snow. Her cheeks had been red from the cold and –hopefully– from excitement. He was certain it’d keep her warm until they’d step into the hut.

When she stood next to him, both feet on the board, she had turned a bit paler.

“Rey.” he nudged her gently, immediately diverting her attention from the height. Those pretty eyes were wide, not exactly with fear, but what was probably worry. She’d do fine. He knew she would. “I’ll be behind you the whole time. It’ll be okay.”

Her healthy looking blush was back.

“It’s nothing… I can do it!” she insisted, forcing herself to look brave and he smiled fondly. Stubborn little… “Let’s go!” she pressed out.

“That’s the spirit.” he praised. “We’ll go in zig-zags just like I showed you earlier. Try not to go too fast for now. Just get comfortable.”

One thing had been clear early on: she was determined to get this right and was far too hard on herself as a result. His continued assurances that she was an incredibly fast learner were of little consequence because he had caught the scowl in her face whenever she got up after falling. The first few times, he had asked whether she had hurt herself, but the way she had glared at him had stopped him from doing so. Obviously, she considered any physical discomfort she might be experiencing to be of little to no importance in relation to failing at remaining on her feet.

Her face was tense with concentration, as she took a settling breath.

It was adorable, but he’d really rather see her enjoy herself.

His mind was pretty much occupied with how he’d get her to relax as he slowly followed her on his own board, when she made to turn, succeeded and suddenly squealed in delight while still sliding the other way.

She was silent for a few more metres down the way, her posture still a bit stiff. He probably should encourage her again.

He caught up with her and sent her a small smile.

“That’s beginning to look very good.” he complimented and she turned her head to beam at him.

“You think?”

“Yup… just relax a bit or you’ll be stiff by the time we’ll reach the hut.”

“I’ll try.” she called and sure enough, her shoulders eased up a little bit.

It took them a little longer to get down to the level of the hut, but Rey had done an incredible job and he was proud of her.

“This looks pretty!” she commented as they walked towards the entrance. It was getting dark and they had turned on the Christmas lights of the rather large wooden cottage. People were beginning to gather their belongings and either take the lift down the mountain or speed down there on skis and boards. Many were also venturing inside along with them, leaving the wooden platform where they had enjoyed some of the winter sun.

Inside it was warm, loud and crowded and he really hoped that his mother had secured a table. By now he was hungry enough to suffer Luke’s suspicious eyes without comment if it meant he’d get his hands on something to eat.

He held his hand out to Rey.

“Stay close.”

The young woman placed her hand in his and they went further inside, when he heard a call from upstairs.

“Ben, up here!” Leia was waving from the platform where more tables had been placed. They made their way up there, trying not to get squeezed by strangers. At some point he maneuvered Rey to walk in front of him, hands on her shoulders so he could shield her better. Probably understanding what he had tried to do, she had turned to look over her shoulder, sending him a warm smile that caused him to grin back rather stupidly.

“Did the two of you have a nice time?” Leia greeted them as they fell into two empty chairs.

“I did!” Rey chirped, slipping out of her jacket. “He’s a great teacher!”

Once more, he could not hold back his own smile.

“You’re just a good student, is all.”

Her amused expression and humble shake of her head filled him with soft warmth. Even more so than the hot soup his mother had ordered for them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No kiss yet, soooorry, I know some of you really wanted it to happen.  
> I hope it was fluffy enough. It has been a while since I wrote anything fluffy  
> and I was concerned about not getting the right amount in, which was why I  
> rewrote that scene a few times and kept coming back to it. 
> 
> Thank you guys so much for being so patient with me.


	12. Oh How They Pound. Please Shut Them Up!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *gives each of you a big hug*  
> Thank you all for your continued support and the love this story receives :) You guys are the reason I wasn't anywhere near a writerblock yet. I feel like I should apologize for always replying so late on the lovely comments you sent my way. I keep them in my inbox as motivation and whenever their numbers grow, I get anxious to write faster, so that's the secret behind that. It worked out incredibly well so far, so bear with me if you please. 
> 
> As of now, this chapter isn't beta-read by anyone but myself. My poor beta is super busy right now and I'd hate to rush her, so if she get's around to reading this chapter, I'll upload the corrections. I think everyone will be happiest with that sollution :)
> 
> Thanks again, folks, you are fantastic!
> 
> Love, Jenny

Chapter 12

It should not have bothered him!

He knew perfectly well that his bad mood was without any semblance of logic and yet he glared out of the window as they drove back to the house. Rey’s hand was still clasped in his. When she wiggled her fingers, he snapped around and –upon registering her anxious face– loosened his too tight grip on her.

“Sorry…” he mumbled, considering letting go completely, but her thumb began to run over the back of his hand and the thought went out of the window as he went over the last hour.

It had been pleasant enough. They had had excellent food and some mulled wine. It had been rather noisy in there due to the fact that more and more people came in now that it was dark outside, but the warm air had made their way all the more cozy. Everyone had been rather relaxed. Rey and his mother obviously got along famously, the older woman doting on the younger. Luke awkwardly kept an eye on Rey every time she took a sip from her wine-mug, but soon seemed to come to the conclusion that she was not indeed pregnant with his baby. Mally and Lando were laughing about some old story, filling everyone in on a tale about how Chewie had tried to cover up a few grey hairs in his long beard, accidentally ending up with a bright ginger instead of the warm auburn hue he had aimed for.

By the time they had left the hut, it had been too dark to get down the mountain any other way than by lift and so they ventured on. As they travelled back into an area that actually had access to wifi and thus civilization, his phone began to vibrate. He had excused himself and had checked his messages.

5 text messages, 2 calls and a furious voicemail enquiring why he wouldn’t answer the calls awaited him, all by Snoke. For some reason, this had ruined his mood thoroughly.

“I need to make a few calls, you go ahead change.” he urged Rey as they returned to the house, taking the walk that would lead him around the house so he’d not be disturbed.

“Where were you?” he was greeted by Snoke’s deep, booming, voice. “You are in Aspen, not the moon, so why did I have to wait 3 hours for you to be so gracious as to call me back?”

Kylo flinched.

“What happened?”

A huff answered him.

“I need you to hurry up. Once you are back in New York, we’ll notify the authorities before Organa might stumble upon the data you planted on her. Were you able to find anything else? It would be incredible to be filled in on such matters, however the inconvenience it might cause you.”

He throat tightened and he felt the urge to tug off his scarf despite the cold wind.

“No, but I will continue to investigate.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. You’ll cease your search and just make sure to transfer the files you were given. In case there is anything else on that computer of hers, the investigation will uncover it. She won’t be able to recover. I made sure to deliver a statement for you to learn to your apartment. It’ll be waiting for you.”

Once more, his boss terminated the call from one second to the other. Kylo’s feet were frozen to the ground and he felt his blood freeze in his veins from a chill that had nothing to do with the winter air of Aspen.

Eventually, his legs began to carry him towards the front of the house where he was certain the garage to be open to allow them to store their equipment until it was dried off enough. From back when he had been a kid, his mother had insisted that they got out of their snow-boots and wet winter-clothes before entering the house. Somehow he didn’t think that had changed at all.

His mind kept coming back to the call he had just received, no matter how much he tried to flee into the memories of Christmas past.

He owed the man. When his uncle had jeopardized his whole future, Snoke alone had stood by him. It was true that Luke's claims would have been easy to rebut, but Kylo would have lost his place in the graduating programme by the time that he would’ve been done fighting the allegations. The story had shocked his mother, but rather than siding with him and fight her brother on his decision, she had been reluctant to act on his behalf. She had wanted to hear both sides, wanted all pieces of information and Luke had simply sidestepped them all by not answering his phone. His father had been worse. The man had never understood the gravity of the business and he simply could not have been bothered to inform himself. Leia and Luke had been well informed about the academic part of young Ben's education! He only made sure that the boy learnt the basic means of being a man. So, the man had brought forward his own ignorance, claiming that he understood nothing of diplomas and such. Ben –so he had assumed– was almost done with university. Why would his high school diploma be of significance?

Snoke had contacted him, had quickly and efficiently taken care of the whole mess. That spring –after a horrible, final Christmas with his family– Kylo had started his internship in the man's law-firm. From then on, everything had been incredibly easy.

Now, Snoke needed his help. The misgivings Leia had had about his employer had always been present, but the fact that the aging man had been able to accomplish what she had failed to do, had been the final nail to the coffin. Back when he had started that internship she suddenly had been very eager to step in, had fought him. Unlike the time when he had needed her help, she didn't care about hearing both sides. She was against Snoke and that was the beginning and the end of it.

As he entered the house, slipping out of his ski jacket and trousers, he felt a headache coming on. What should he do?

 

* * *

“I’ll go up and take a shower.” Rey excused herself, storing the snowboard she had used in the garage to dry. Leia nodded.

“You do that, dear. Mally was going to bake cookies later. Want to join in?” Kylo’s mother wondered and Mally chimed in to encourage her to participate.

“I’ll call a few friends of mine first but afterwards I’d love to.”

Rey had been on her way upstairs shortly afterwards.

Han had passed her in the hall, patting her shoulder and calling for Leia.

Chewie was on the phone, his roaring laughter filling the air as he clearly enjoyed the conversation.

Deciding to take that shower before calling the others, she immediately checked whether the necklace was still there. For the first time she had time to look at it while it rested against her dark turtleneck. Absentmindedly, she reached up and allowed her fingers to press against the little snowflake. Its edges weren’t sharp and the metal had warmed up due to having been worn beneath her clothes for so long. She had been incredibly worried about losing it, so she had fumbled it to be hidden.

Rather reluctantly, she now took it off and carefully placed it on one of the towels in a cabinet. She’d keep it as far away from any sink as humanly possible, too worried that it might fall in and be lost forever. Stripping down, she got into the shower.

As she stood under the hot water, she grinned to herself even though her knees and bum hurt. After a quick check, she couldn’t see any bruising though, so that was something. She couldn’t remember ever having been as cold as today. Even in the warmth of the hut, a little bit of a chill had clung to her bones and she prayed to God that she didn’t catch a cold today. Now however, it melted away quickly and the prospect of slipping into warm wool socks was something she looked forward to.

She allowed her mind to wander.

Baking cookies on Christmas would be lovely. It had been one of the few things they had actually done back in the orphanage, too. They had made rather simple ones, but still, the children had been incredibly thrilled about the prospect of doing it. Of course it would be a lot better doing it in Leia’s lovely kitchen.

For a moment she was about to be overwhelmed again, but then she recalled Kylo’s kind actions and words. She wasn’t quite certain that she’d call him if Unkar ended up finding her, but the simple fact that he had offered his help meant a lot to her. When she had started to cry again he didn’t have to stay and simply listen to her until she was all cried out.

He didn’t have to hold her like that either.

Recalling how safe and cared for she had felt while he had held her, caused the last remaining chill to evaporate. It was replaced by soft and very timid heat that spread through her whole body.

Not that her male friends never hugged her. Finn was an incredible hugger! But Finn was her best friend. They had known each other for quite a while now. Finn was family and his hugs felt just like that. Kylo holding her had been different. His embrace had been gentle and leaning against his firm chest had made her feel so…

_ Oh God! _

Her face buried in her hands as she stifled a low whine.

She was –without a question– the worst escort in the world!

Was she falling for him?

The image of him without a shirt flickered in front of her inner mind’s eye and she covered up the frustrated groan that almost escaped her with a hand smacked over her mouth. Hot water was still running over her body, but it couldn’t compare to the warmth of her blushing face.

This could not be happening.

Yes, he was kind and sweet in his own weird way and –granted– looked incredible with and without his clothes on, but…

She should absolutely not be thinking about him without his clothes on while in the shower, she interrupted her own thoughts.

No! This wasn’t happening!

He had been kind, she had been devastated and confused and that was the end of it. She didn’t have a thing for Kylo!

Her feelings, she tried to explain by looking at the situation from a different perspective. While –yes!– she had met many lovely people these past couple of years, her life had been painfully short of decent folks. Her reaction to the Solo family’s gifts and warm welcome offered to her had thrown her off for a reason.

Kylo, while someone who definitely would have caught her eye under any and every circumstance, and her little sentimental slip-up belonged into the same category. Men who just cared out of the goodness of their hearts and without the prospect of getting laid, had not stepped into her life in great abundance.

And he was a kind man, no matter how rough he might appear on first sight.

Stepping out of the shower, she couldn’t help but smile when she recalled the expression he had had on his face when Toby had recited the poem. Once more, something warm bloomed inside of her chest.

Him helping that little boy…

Of course there were worse men in the word to develop a crush on! Not that she was in the process of doing so. But – _ Really! _ – who could blame her if she were? It’d make her work a bit easier, right? Not that this could turn into anything serious. She had little to no illusions on that front! He was out of her league. Rich lawyers didn’t date poor art students who could barely pay their bills. But how bad could it be if she allowed herself to enjoy being close to him for the time being?

It wasn’t like she was in love, she figured while drying herself off with a fluffy towel, eyes searching the necklace, resting patiently where she had put it before.

She sighed.

Everything would be alright come Thursday and afterwards she would pine a bit, but get over it quickly. It wasn’t the first crush that had never amounted to anything and it wouldn’t be the last one now, would it?

Rey tried not to register the pain spreading in her chest upon those thoughts.

 

* * *

Her eyes were pure warmth as they met his.

“No bad news, I hope?” his mother wondered as he walked by the kitchen. The air smelled of fresh coffee and he couldn’t decide whether it’d help his headache along to have one or whether he ought to flee and not risk a sparring match with his mother.

“Nothing to worry about until after Christmas.” he told her.

At this, her lips pinched together, creating a thin line of disapproval. Any moment now she’d voice her discontent without holding back and he wished that he had simply kept walking instead of standing in the hallway, looking into the kitchen like a teenager who was about to get a serious dressing-down.

To his utter and complete astonishment, Leia just sighed.

“Just make sure you don’t let it worry you while you’re here.” she told him not unkindly. She took a cup, held it up and jiggled it a bit, offering to pour him a cup. He answered with a silent nod. While the hot, dark liquid was filling up the mug, she continued. “You’re like me when it comes to work.” she sounded rueful and shook her head sadly. “Always rather get the deed over with immediately, so it won’t become a problem later. Duty here, obligations there and you just grab them, handle the issues because you want things done right.” she rambled, walking towards him with the mug between her hands. Kylo stumbled forward a few steps to meet her half way. Her hands clasped his after he had accepted the warm cup from her, eyes holding his and not letting go.

“Take it from one who has the authority on misplaced priorities; Don’t do that to yourself. Nor to the people that you love and who love you back.” she smiled. “That girl of yours, she deserves your undivided attention. God knows you have hers.”

His mouth opened to reply.

It closed when his head remained empty while his heart poured over with pain and warmth and … and…

“Mom, I…” his voice cracked and he really wasn’t sure where he was going with this. His heart had never been eloquent.

So they remained silent.

“You look pale, Ben.” she finally told him, reaching up to cup the side of his face.

“I’ve got a bit of a headache.” his voice still hadn’t recovered, but at least he was capable of complete sentences, along with understatements. By now his head felt close to splitting open.

Leia, quickly but gently, urged him to go up and get some rest. She assured him that she could go and get him something for the headache in case he needed it, but he waved it off. A pill would not help against the emotional strain.

It was all too much!

Snoke’s expectations as well as his family’s sudden attempts to be close to him. It confused him. All of it!

They hadn’t given a damn about him for years now, had not been there when he had needed them the most. None of this fit together! He remembered what Snoke had told him. Why would they want him now? What had changed? He had made every decision they had been adamant to talk him out of. Had decided on a way they had never been on-board with.

His head throbbed as he made his way up. Rey probably wouldn’t mind if he took a nap on the bed, right? Not that he was tired! His mind was buzzing with conflicting thoughts.

Entering the room, he slumped onto the bed, face buried in his hands. This was going to be a long day.

The bathroom door opened and he heard Rey patting into the room.

“Hey, you can have the shower n– Are you okay?” she interrupted her own offer, sounding slightly worried. Her feet continue to carry her closer from the sound of it until he feels someone crouch down in front of him, one hand on his knee.

“Kylo?” her voice was soft, careful.

“Got a headache is all.” he mumbled to put her at ease.

And utterly failed at recognizing that this was apparently the wrong approach. Her hand, warm from the shower she had just taken shifts from his knee to his shoulder.

“Do you need something for it? I’ve got some Aspirin with me.”

He sensed her getting up and, shaking his head, he sat up, hands falling limp onto his lap. His eyes were met with the sight of Rey, wrapped in a fluffy white bathrobe, hair wet, undone and falling in soft, messy waves over her shoulders, face a bit flushed from the heat she had probably just treated herself to. The girl’s pretty eyes were filled with concern. For him.

It dulled some of the aggravating thoughts in his brain and he took a few more seconds to allow his eyes to slowly travel over her whole form.

The robe was too fluffy, too big, to betray any curves that the girl might be hiding underneath. He wasn’t the kind of guy who usually got excited over a naked ankle and now, with a throbbing in his head that had no business being there, he wasn’t about to become one. The sight of her still distracted him enough for a moment or two and he would’ve gladly spent the remainder of the day by staring at her all wrapped up, while allowing for a few teasing flashes of naked skin. However, she stood there for a reason, namely out of the much-appreciated goodness of her heart. 

“That’s okay. I’ll take a quick shower and then lay down for a bit if you don’t mind.” he told her, holding his head in a bit of an awkward angle. Sitting up straight made the pain worse somehow.

Her brows arched into a frown.

“Are you sure? You could shower after your nap.”

“No.” shaking his head hurt too much. “Maybe I’m just tense and the hot water will relax my muscles.”

With that he got up and made to walk past her, but she brought her hand up to press against his chest. A kind smile was on her face.

He wanted it to calm him down.

Alas, it was not to be. If anything, his pulse quickening only made his headache worse.

“I could try and give you a massage after the shower then. If it’s your muscles then that should help, right?”

The image of her straddling his naked back while still only clad in a bathrobe that flashed in front of his eyes did not help calm him down, quite the contrary. He swallowed hard and was rather glad the he felt too much discomfort for the rather titillating scene that kept running through his head to have any physical effect. For now. 

He excused himself, assuring her that he’d take her up on her offer in case a nap wouldn’t help his headache.

Great, now, there were a couple more thoughts to haunt him.

He shouldn’t lust over Rey, no matter how enticing he thought her to be.

The girl seemed to enjoy his company, yes, but that didn’t mean he ought to allow himself to picture her long legs as she straddled him. Strong little hands kneading his tense muscles as she huffed in…

Yeah, this was going about as well as he might’ve anticipated!

He snorted, which sent another wave of pain through his head.

Rey shouldn’t be consuming his thoughts. He had other things to concern himself with, despite the fact that he wouldn’t have minded thinking about Rey a bit longer. And not just about how nice it’d feel to have her touch him. The girl would probably need his help again and soon. Whether she’d allow her pride to call him, he didn’t know. He doubted it, really. It had been an integral part of her life to take care of herself. For too long, the only person who cared about Rey Doe, had been Rey Doe.

The young woman had friends now, and he was glad the she knew someone as resourceful as Paige. But if bad came to worse, he’d really rather rest assured that someone would be there who knew how to get Plutt in jail and make certain that he’d rot in there.

Anger flashed through him and with it more pain.

Leaning his head against the cool tiles of the shower, he sighed.

All this amounted to nothing. As much as he’d prefer to deal with Rey and solve her problems, he couldn’t. Not now.

Letting Snoke down was not an option. Too much depended on him remaining in his position now. The old man would and could replace him any time, he had never made a secret of that.

But…

His mother’s warm eyes and sad smile bothered him.

Why now?

 

* * *

“Hey Finn!” she chimed as the call was accepted.

“Peanut!” the young man cried into the phone. “Merry Christmas! Guys! It’s Rey!”

Rey beamed at nothing in particular as she heard her other friends scramble towards Finn. She also heard Mr Tico shouting, wishing her a happy Christmas.

“Rey!” she heard Paige and Rose chirp into Finn’s phone.

It felt so good to hear their voices. They all sounded incredibly happy, too, which added to her joy.

“How is Christmas treating you people?”

“I think my Mom won’t let us leave ever again to be honest.” Rose told her matter of factly.  

“Tell Rey to pack her stuff and get up here, too.” she heard Mrs Tico call, laughing.

The Ticos were as kind as could be, always inviting Finn and Rey to come along when their two daughters visited. Neither of them ever accepted any sort of compensation in return. Once Rey and Finn had offered to pay for some groceries and Mr Tico had started at them like they had just grown three additional heads, while Mrs Tico went along to pay for said groceries, telling them not to be silly.

“How’s work?” Paige asked eagerly. She was the only one who knew what her work entailed while the others thought that she had offered to help out her friend at the coffeehouse.

“Work is fine. Not too stressful, thank God! Everyone is super nice and people are in a great mood. Talked to my boss today. Super happy with our progress it seems.”

That sounded vague enough right?

“Lucky you! There’s nothing worse than cranky customers.” Finn said, having had his share of shitty people while having worked in retail for a couple of months.

“Are you at home already?” Rose asked.

“Yeah, I’m relaxing a bit.”

“Huh… I tried calling our phone earlier. Why didn’t you pick up?” the young woman asked and Rey stiffened.

“She probably just got in, Rosie-Posie.” Paige teased and Rey thanked the heavens.

“I heard the phone ringing when opening the door, but didn’t get it in time.” Rey added and Rose sounded perfectly happy with that explanation. “What are you guys up to? I think I’ll get some reading and painting in later, cook something nice.” she did not want them to think that she’d be bored and miserable all alone in their apartment while she’d be baking Christmas cookies with Mally and Leia, which would probably turn out to be a whole lot of fun. Pity had never been something she could accept from others and right now she didn’t deserve it either way.

“Don’t you stay up all night again, okay Peanut?” Finn reprimanded. Damn, she had forgotten that they were a few hours ahead of Aspen time.

“O-of course not.” she stuttered.

“You stay up all night to get lucky!” Paige sang comically. “Who are you, her mother?” she asked Finn.

“If I were, she’d be here with us.” Finn huffed and Rose laughed before faking a deep voice.

“I’ll be your Daddy, Rey.”

Rey giggled at her friend’s antics. When the water turned off in the bathroom, she wished them Merry Christmas once more and ended the call. Kneeling on the bed, she waited for Kylo to get out. She had meant to ask him whether he would like to join in on the baking, but now she just wanted to make sure that he would feel better soon. Hopefully training her hadn’t been too frustrating for him.

The door opened a bit later and he came out wearing a soft looking black shirt that clung to his upper body and sweatpants.

“I think I’ll take a nap.” he mumbled and she nodded and scooped over so he could drop onto the bed.

“Feeling any better?” Rey inquired as he settled down with a sigh.

“Nothing a bit of sleep won’t fix.” Kylo told her dismissively. “Don’t mind me, you just go enjoy yourself. Build a snowman or something.”

“Actually, your mom and Mally asked whether I’d like to help them bake some cookies. I thought I’d join them.” she informed him. For a second he said nothing, only stared at the ceiling.

“Save me a few cookies? Dad and Chewie like to steal batter, too, just a heads up.” he finally muttered without sounding all there with her.

He really must’ve been exhausted.

 

* * *

She momentarily leaned over him. Kylo couldn’t be certain what she had intended to do, because she leaned back again, but if he hadn’t known any better he might flatter himself into thinking that she had wanted to give him a kiss. A quick peck on the forehead maybe? To kiss it better?

That would’ve been nice.

But he really wouldn’t have deserved it.

When she had informed him about what she planned to do, a plan had formed. His mother, Mally and Rey would be busy in the kitchen. Han, Luke, Lando and Chewie were probably working on the Falcon. Everyone was accounted for, including him, now that he ought to take a nap.

He could go and check her computer. Still very reluctant to just put something on there when he could not be certain what it was, he just hoped he’d find some discrepancies with her tax returns.

Rey made sure that he had water by the bedside and that he was comfortable, which he found incredibly endearing. Whether all escorts did this, he had no idea, but her attempts to make him feel better, actually did the opposite.

Here he was, pretending to get ready for a nap, while planning on the shortest route to his mother’s office. The fact that his head was still killing him was of no importance. He needed to resolve this, once and for all.

Not that he enjoyed it.

When he slipped out of the room around 20 minutes after Rey had left, his stomach acted up, adding to his headache. Kylo had never suffered from migraines, so he knew that could not be it. Apprehension made the throbbing of his head all the worse and for a moment, a brief, unguarded thought cursed Snoke.

His head ached too much for him to feel bad about that curse as he opened Leia’s office door. Closing it behind him, he made his way over to the hardwood desk where Leia’s laptop rested. Glaring at it like it was something offensive, he sat down in the plush office-chair. His mother had always taken care of having comfortable furniture. No need in being uncomfortable while doing work, he heard her say.

Beginning with her emails, he scrolled through both her inbox as well as her sent emails. She was incredibly careless, not even having it secured by password. Sure, this was her private computer and he doubted that this laptop ever left her house. Still, if he had known, he would have told her to be more careful…

His hand stilled.

What was he doing?

The names and words on the screen blurred as he kept staring at the screen.

What was he doing?

He buried his head in his hands, closed his eyes tightly and curled his fingers into fists.

Kylo closed the window and slammed the laptop shut, jumping out of the chair as if it was made of hot coals.

No.

This was wrong.

Stalking towards the door, reaching for the handle, he meant to stalk back to his room and never to return to the office. Snoke be damned, he’d just tell him that Leia had been too protective of the damn thing.

On his way through the door he almost collided with Han and Luke.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OH NOOOOOOOO!  
> ... should I add a warning for cruel cliffhangers? I feel like I should, because it recently came to my attention that I do come up with really rude endings for every chapter. I blame Dickens!


	13. He Did See Me Creep Out the Door to Have A Peep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guuuuuys!!! It's so late over here and I am exhausted but I really wanted to finish this horrible chapter D: I'll read it again tomorrow and check for spelling mistakes, so I apologize for any I might've/will've missed just now, but I felt bad for keeping you waiting for almost a whole week after such a nasty cliffhanger. 
> 
> Once again I have to thank all you lovely readers for your patience and the love this fic is receiving. Every single comment and kudos makes me incredibly happy and I hope this chapter won't disappoint you –though it was a piece of work!
> 
> Love you, folks!!!

Chapter 13

 

His stomach dropped and he practically felt the colour drain from his face as he stared at his father. Funny. When he had still been a child, he had always thought that Han Solo was the largest man in the universe. Somehow, he had even appeared taller than Chewbacca, stupid as it was looking back now. While he had surpassed his father’s height by several inches by now, some part of him emerged that still felt incredibly small whenever he stood too close to Han.

The larger than life image he had of the man had always rendered any and every kind of physical growth insignificant. This man was Han Solo. The man may have started his life as a common criminal, but somewhere along the line, he had started to use his talents for the good of other people. Smuggling food, water and medicine into war zones to help civilians, get political opponents of dictators and corrupt governments to safety when they were persecuted; A few years back he and Leia had used his former contacts to smash a human trafficking coup. It had been the year he had considered going home for Christmas. He had read about it in the papers and he had been incredibly proud of them both –despite never voicing it to anyone.

The tall man might just as well have been his tiny six year-old-self as they stood across from each other in the hallway.

Kylo felt caught and a high-pitched ringing noise added to the throbbing of his head.

Shit.

“Looking for something, kid?” Han asked, tilting his head slightly.

His mouth was dry, as was his throat.

Kylo would rather be anywhere else right now.

Swallowing, he nodded.

“I needed to use mom’s laptop. Mine is acting up.”

“I hear you.” Luke said with an easy smile. “Having problems with the Wifi, too?”

The young man nodded quickly. It was no lie. Things took a century and a half up here to load, something he really wasn’t used to from his life in the city.

“One might think you two would die if you didn’t get to check your emails every five minutes.” Han taunted, smirking. “Did your mother’s computer help along?” he asked, patting his son on the shoulder while gently nudging him out of the way as he stepped past him into the office.

“Y-Yeah, I’m good now.” Came the hurried answer. He wanted to leave now, but couldn’t simply rush off. That would look suspicious.

“Good, good. Let me give you the password for the other router. I installed it two years ago when your uncle almost had a fit when he couldn’t get proper reception. Should’ve seen him, kid!” Han chuckled as he rummaged through a drawer. “He acted like the world as we know it might end if he couldn’t upload grades. Seriously, as if kids need their holidays ruined by a shitty result on their exams.”

“Hear, hear…”

It had just slipped out. He had hated those pre-Christmas examinations. Especially since he was present while his uncle graded the papers and tests in the classes he taught. When he had been around 13, Luke had started to place his own graded exams in front of his door once he had been done with them. Luke taught History, a subject young Ben Solo had always enjoyed and none of his written exams had ever received anything lower than 95% (a slip-up. He’d been bored senseless for once. Mr Cromwell might’ve caused quite a bit of chaos in England, but to him, the man had been tedious and incredibly boring.). But even back then his mother had scolded her brother for working during the holidays. She didn’t work, so nobody else got to work either. Ben had liked this truce. It meant that he had his parent’s undivided attention for once.

“I can’t have them forget what they learnt during the holidays!” Luke argued, a small smile on his face.

“Yeah, but their results won’t jog their memories either, take it from someone who was glad for every C- he received.” Han winked at Kylo, who reacted with a twitching smile. “Ah, here we go!”

He pulled out a small piece of paper, held it up in victory and walked towards his son.

“Just try this one when your wifi acts up next. It should work fine.”

Nodding slowly, Kylo almost let out a sigh of relief. He had not been caught out.

“Don’t tell mom I was in here though.” he muttered, causing his father to frown. “I have a headache and I know she wouldn’t want me to work right now. I am supposed to be asleep.”

Rolling his eyes his father sighed.

“Then off you go. Your mother can always tell when you lie to her.” Placing a hand on his son’s shoulder once more, Han ushered him out and away from the office. “Most inconvenient superpower in history.” the older man added in a soft growl.

Kylo needn’t be told twice. He was far too glad to have gotten away with his attempt to spy and his head really was killing him. But it had been too close! No more stunts.

Snoke would have to find another way to get to his mother.

He’d simply tell his boss that Leia always kept her laptop with her. That made perfect sense, didn’t it?

As his head hit the soft cushion, his eyes fell shut.

There was a sweet, warm smell in the air and he smiled despite his dark notions of his very angry mentor. They were quickly replaced by thoughts of Rey and how she might be crouching in front of the oven to watch the cookies being baked to perfection. The whole house smelt of the baking going on downstairs and while his father always complained about the open structure of the house being hell to keep heated, Kylo found the smell soothing.

He fell asleep while imagining Rey with some flour across her little nose.  

 

* * *

 

Rey felt excited, watching the cookies bake through the oven-window, nibbling on one that had cooled down sufficiently. At first she had simply crouched down but had eventually gotten onto her knees when the position had gotten uncomfortable. The heat radiating from the oven warmed her face and she smiled happily, biting her lower lip from time to time.

The third batch would be done soon, she could tell.

A soft chuckle filled her ears as Luke entered the kitchen.

“Worried Chewie might steal them before they are done?” he joked and she grinned at him.

“He did get his hands on a lot of batter. I think Mally had us make more because she foresaw it.” the young woman answered, turning her face back towards the sweet-smelling warmth, bathing her face in a soft, golden light. At this point, she didn’t know how to feel about Luke to be honest. The man seemed nice enough. A bit reserved maybe, but not unkind by a long shot. But his allegations of her being pregnant and the story of him withdrawing Kylo’s certificate had shocked her.

“I don’t think he’d be so bold and steal them out of the oven though.” Luke told her in an easy voice. “The floor must be cold.”

“It’s fine.”

Neither said anything for a moment, but she heard him move about in the kitchen.

“I’m not pregnant, you know?” Rey heard herself inform him. She didn’t see any reason why she shouldn’t. It would be better to be quite frank with Luke if he insisted on being so suspicious. She had grown fond of the man during their little shopping spree and the idea of him being wary of her because he thought her some gold-digger did not sit well with her. Since he was the one who had tried to sabotage his nephew at some point, him being suspicious towards her made him a bit of a hypocrite in her humble opinion.

The fact that he spluttered into his cup made her grin smugly.

“He told you?” the man sounded incredulous as if the idea of them sharing these things only just occurred to him now.

“Of course he did. And I’ll have you know that I don’t want to get married just yet either.” she stated, her voice a little cold. Turning her head towards the man, the glow of the oven now warming only one of her cheeks, she saw that the man was blushing and stared down into his cup.

“I should apologize… He’s an affectionate boy underneath it all…”

“I am aware.” she interrupted dryly. Rey had seen glimpses of that affectionate nature which seemed to come to him way more naturally than his grumpy demeanour. The longer they stayed here, far away from New York, the more she was capable of making out who the man who paid her to be his girlfriend was behind the professional façade. And she had decided that she quite liked that man!

Luke nodded slowly.

“I was… It would be easy for Snoke to set him up with some harpy who could lead him on and…” here the man sighed. “I am sorry, Rey. I misjudged.” Luke shrugged. “You seemed too good to be true.” Here he looked up and sent her a rather sheepish grin which made him look younger than he was.

“I never met Snoke.” Rey filled him in, straightening her shoulders as she stood up.

“Lucky you. Try not to be too critical about the man. Ben is incredibly faithful to him.” The bitterness in Luke’s voice riled her. It had obviously been due to his deeds that had given Snoke every opportunity to make himself invaluable to Kylo.

“Maybe I get to be critical since I didn’t withdraw his diploma.” the young woman suggested in the same cool tone she had been using since the beginning of their little conversation.

Luke became very pale and opened his mouth to reply when Leia entered the kitchen with a content smile on her face. Rey greeted the older woman with a smile of her own, turning away from Luke as Kylo’s mother approached her brother.

“Feeling warm again?” the older woman inquired rubbing Luke’s back. He cleared his throat.

“Getting there.” To her own gratification Rey registered that his voice sounded somewhat shaky. “Seriously, I am getting too old for this. Next year I’ll come along to the hut and stay there all day. I promise to be a lot of fun when you come to pick me up.” he told his sister dryly, but with a forced smile on his face.

“So you won’t be coming with us tomorrow, I suppose?” Leia charged, peaking into the oven and giving a very content little nod. “These look good.”

Rey, pulling on the oven mittens to get out the next batch and to add the one that had already been prepared, bowed down when Luke told Leia that he wasn’t too certain about tomorrow.

“I’ll wait and ask Han whether he’ll come along. I’d hate to be left alone here.”

“Then let’s hope Ben will be well again tomorrow. Poor boy, he looked horrible.” Leia lamented, shaking her head slowly. “That creature works him too hard, he needs someone who tells him to stop from time to time, not someone who makes him feel that no matter how hard he works it’ll be insuf… oh God, Rey, I am so sorry!” Leia cut through her own angry ramble.

Rey found herself shaking her head as she pulled the biscuits out and placed them on top of the oven.

“I haven’t met the man. But I do agree that Kylo works too hard.” she muttered, nodding. “I think I’ll take some of these up in a minute, make sure he feels better.”

Leia gently touched Rey’s shoulder, leaning over the batch of cookies, breathing in through her nose. With a happy sigh, she grinned at the younger woman. “Delicious. Now, lets not say that too loudly though or Chewie will be onto us.”

Rey laughed softly.

“He once ate almost all of them together with Ben. It was just after one of the boy’s freaky growth-spurts. I swear for some time he could barely catch a break. He was one gangly teen.” Here she smiled at Rey. “Hard to believe now, eh?”

“Indeed, I mean he looks incredibl… uhm…” Rey began to stutter before clearing her throat. “I mean he takes good care of himself. And is super tall. But you knew that.”

Her cheeks tingled as they darkened.

_Shit. Get a grip!_

Leia however, only sent her a mischievous grin.

“It’s alright to tell a mother that she has a handsome son, Rey! I bet your parents must be told pretty much the same thing whenever someone even so much as mentions you.”

The woman had meant well. It was an incredibly nice thing to say and she was convinced that any other girl who’d hear the mother of her boyfriend tell her something this sweet would be very relieved.

But to Rey it was more of a punch in the gut than an appreciated compliment.

“Uhm, well, I’ll go and bring Kylo a few of these…” she placed a few cookies on a plate, her stupid voice sounding rather shaky. This was ridiculous! “…and see whether he needs anything. Excuse me!”

She had rushed out of the kitchen too quickly to see the twins glance at one another in confusion.

 

* * *

 

Kylo started awake and sat up too quickly, feeling a bit lightheaded for a second. Grasping for his phone, he found it missing and he glanced at the nightstand rather dumbly.

“I put it here.” A soft voice informed him and he only now registered that Rey was sitting in one of the armchairs by the window, a book in her lap. His phone rested on the other chair. “It was vibrating when I came in and I didn’t want it to wake you.”

“Ah.” His brain was still rather slow. Must’ve been a long nap. “What time is it?”

“A few minutes past seven. Leia just informed me that dinner would be ready soon.”

Good, he was hungry.

And his head felt a lot better.

He got up and walked into the bathroom, only to emerge a few moments later with a panicked expression on his face.

“You didn’t answer the phone did you?” he demanded, grasping for it and checking his messages.

“Of course not!” Rey stated, obviously surprised by the panic and the sudden mood shift.

He prayed to any and every higher force he could think of that it hadn’t been Snoke who had tried to call. After the last incident he could not allow himself to be unavailable again. With great relief he realized that it had not been his boss, but Justin. He’d wait until he was alone to call him back, but quickly typed out a message to the man.

“Don’t do that again. It might’ve been important.” Kylo told her, sounding rather stern with her. The idea of Snoke missing him twice in one day… He’d never hear the end of it.

“You looked like shit earlier!” she argued, frowning disapprovingly. “And I saw that it wasn’t your boss or I would’ve woken you up.”

He sighed and nodded his head.

Kylo was in no mood to fight, too glad that his head had stopped pounding.

“Sorry.” he sat back down on the bed, rubbing his face. “My boss just called during our trip to the mountain and my phone wasn’t working up there and…” another sigh. “He was not happy.”

Hearing soft steps coming towards him, he looked up in time to see Rey kneeling next to him on the bed. One warm hand reached out to rub his back in soothing circles.

“He’s giving you a hard time because there was no mobile reception?” she asked softly.

Kylo shrugged.

“He’s used to me being available when he needs me.” was the only explanation he could give. The girl leant back, her face contorting into an adorable frown as she thought about his words.

“Sorry, but that’s ridiculous. If he expects you to be available 24/7 he ought to buy you your own freaking satellite.” she proclaimed suddenly and he was surprised into a barking fit of laughter. The young thing next to him wasn’t wrong, though he’d never tell Snoke that. Kylo was eager to sear both her expression as well as the tone of her voice into his memory. She sounded both incredulous and extremely protective which made his heart miss a beat. This tone would be something he’d like to remember during grey, stressful days back in the office. Just like the rest of her.

“You tell him that.” he joked, not meaning it of course. There was something wrong about the idea of Snoke meeting Rey. He had felt very glad when the old man had not insisted on becoming acquainted with the girl who was replacing Bazine on his trip, due to the fact that Rey was an escort. Of course, his boss would’ve seen right through their story. He had an uncanny way of knowing when Kylo lied to him, so his relief had been on a professional basis back then.

But now it was for a different reason. Rey was so entirely different from the women he knew to frequent his and Snoke’s circles. A pure, fragile yet incredibly determined young woman had no business with the army of future trophy wives Snoke had had him meet in the past. He could picture the disdain the old man would have for someone as independent and self-sufficient as sweet Rey and it angered him. Inside of him, something dark, hot and protective came alive, ready to snarl at his mentor for imagined slights towards such a precious, little jewel.

“I actually might.” she grinned at him in an easy, teasing way that had him chuckle. The idea was as entertaining as it was terrifying.

Kylo’s eyes lingered on her happy face. There was no batter or flour on her, but her cheeks carried that cute little blush she always seemed to have whenever she was excited or happy. Her eyes were bright with a mischievous twinkle he wouldn’t mind seeing more often. Only now did he register that she had brought some of the lovely smell with her and he leaned in closer to her.

“You smell like cookies.” he informed her, his voice a low purr, which surprised him for but a moment. A rather deviant part of him imagined her smiling coyly, leaning in and challenging him to find out whether she tasted like cookies too. Clearing his throat and his head, he got off the bed to get a bit of distance between himself and her enticing presence.    

“How did the baking go?” he asked, walking back into the bathroom to wash his face as he saw her perk up at the question.

“Rather well, I think. I brought some up for you.”

He heard her walk back towards the chair she had sat on when he had woken up.

Kylo chuckled.

“Cookies before dinner? Mom will be thrilled!” he called and heard her giggle.

“I kinda ate most of them anyway so you should be fine!” she chirped, causing him to grin as he brushed his hair. When he got out, his gaze fell on a plate with three cookies on it.

“You fit right in with us, don’t you?” he growled playfully as he leaned down to grab one. Soon he found that he couldn’t blame her, letting out an appreciative grown as he chewed.

“They were better when they were still warm, you know?” she teased as he finished the first one. Reaching out her little hand to seize one of the remaining two biscuits, she leaned back in her chair. Without thinking he leant down once more. Instead of taking a hold of the last cookie, he boldly placed his hands on the two armrests and took a big bite of the one that had been halfway to Rey’s mouth.

She gaped at him, which soon turned into a bright smile and a laugh.

“I thought those were for me?” he asked, feeling playful and winked at the girl in the chair.

“Scoundrel!” she accused as he chewed and swallowed, looming over her.

“Minx.” he replied, smirking at the young woman lounging in the chair.    

Arching a brow at him, Rey slowly moved the rest of the cookie towards her mouth, her hazel eyes not leaving his as those delicious lips parted. Lazily, smirking as he did, he leaned down once more, teeth sinking into the sweet treat. This time, he didn’t even bother to lean back, just holding her gaze.

Those bright eyes of hers had darkened considerably and he would really rather not think about how close their lips were right now and how his heart had sped up. Another problem he’d rather not dwell on was how freaking nice she smelt and how both the proximity as well as her lovely fragrance had an effect on his body.

Her phone startled them both as it began to ring.

 

* * *

 

“Maz! Hello!” she greeted, pressing her voice out of her throat, blushing with utter embarrassment.

“Hello dear! Now is not a bad time, is it?” came the other woman’s raspy voice. This was actually an incredibly bad time where Rey was concerned, but she could barely tell Maz that.

“No! No, now is fine. How are you?” Her eyes met Kylo’s once more before he turned away to sit on the bed, waiting for her to finish the phone call. Shit, shit, shit, what had just almost happened there? She was frantic and had to act calm and relaxed and she hated it.

“I am well, dear. Did you do anything fun today?”

“Kylo taught me how to snowboard and I baked biscuits earlier along with Leia and Mally.” Rey listed today’s exploits. Lists always helped her relax, this one not being any different. It had been a really nice day, if she said so herself!

“No broken bones I hope?” Maz inquired.

“No, no broken bones, everyone is fine. Kylo had a bit of a headache earlier but he’s all better now, I think.” Here she threw him an inquisitive glance, which he answered with a nod.

“Say hello to him from me, dear. Listen, I don’t want to bother you for too long now, but do remember to swing by the office once you’re back in New York, all right? We need to talk about a few things, even if this will be the first and last time you’ll appear in our books.”

“All right, I’ll call beforehand.”

“No need.” Came the gruff reply. “Just come in, we’ll have tea.”

Shortly after, they ended the call and both Kylo and her were left to rather awkward silence.

“Maz says Hi!” she squeaked and flinched at how high pitched her voice was.

“Thanks…” if she wasn’t mistaken, his voice sounded rather hoarse.

Shit, she had almost broken their rule.

Having openly flirted with him had not been professional at all. It had felt natural!, but what about this whole spiel could be called that?! Ugh, Paige never mentioned how not to be attracted to a client. Maybe he ought to remind her more often that he paid her to be here! That might help! But he was so cordial all the time, never dictating her to be more or less affectionate, never pushing any boundaries. Leave that to her, teasing him with a damn biscuit!

Taking a deep shuddering breath, she opened her mouth to apologize.

“The cookies are delicious.”

Whirling around to face him, she realized that his eyes were glued on his large hands as he rubbed them on his thighs in a nervous fashion.

Her heart was beating violently against her ribcage as she turned her phone in her hands. Truth be told, he hadn’t looked all that uncomfortable, right? And he could’ve leaned back instead of remaining so close. Or not eat the biscuit from her hand.

“I– I am sorry about…” she broke off when he began interrupting her while shaking his head.

“No, no it’s fine… I mean it was my fault, I…”

There was a knock on the door and Leia peaked in to inquire after Kylo and informing them that dinner was about to be ready.

“We’ll be down in a minute, mom.” Kylo told her and the woman nodded, winking at Rey as she left the room.

She sat there, waiting. He had been cut short by his mother, so she figured it would be appropriate to allow him to finish his thought.

 

* * *

 

If only he had a thought to begin with, but he couldn’t finish a thing that wasn’t there!

 _I really would have liked to kiss you just now!,_ did not strike him as an appropriate thing to tell his hired girlfriend. Not that he didn’t want to kiss her or enjoyed reminding himself that Rey was here because he could afford her. Shit, that sounded just so wrong! Which was why he always pushed the thought back. Just like now! The young woman was entirely too delectable when she was acting coy.

But he _was_ paying her and reflecting on that had dampened his arousal as fast as her pretty, soft-looking and perfectly shaped lips had awakened it. For heaven’s sake, they had even agreed on not kissing each other on the lips… while they were in company. Did the contract extend to their alone time? They were pretty much themselves while being alone and during those periods, they had not exactly been averse to touching one another. He lingered on the memory of her kissing his cheek. The tortuous warmth that filled his entire being was an indicator that this was not the thought he should be focussing on right now!

“Have I made you uncomfortable just now?” he inquired, not daring to look at her.

“No… of course not.” she answered quickly and he felt great relief. At least he hadn’t scared her.

“Good. I apologize if I took it a bit too far just now.”

Once more, she shook her head. Clearing his throat for what felt like the hundredth time, he got up and extended a hand.

“We should get down. Have dinner. After today everyone will be starving to death.”

She had the most charming little blush on her face as she accepted his hand.

 

Dinner turned out to be filling and a rather relaxed gathering tonight. Rey told Han and Chewie about her first attempts to remain standing on the board, making both men roar with laughter as she laid down her failed first tries when it came to break. Luke, Lando and Leia were in the midst of a discussion about politics –something only likeminded people ought to be allowed to engage in during the holidays– and Kylo was inquiring after Mally’s and Chewie’s son. The roast they had was delicious, the salad fresh and the ice-cream a perfect dessert to what was easily the most pleasant dinner the Solo’s had had in years. Kylo registered that Rey and his mother were engaged in conversations rather often during their meal. To his great joy Leia appeared to be quite happy with his girlfriend, asking her all sorts of questions about her friends, her interests, her art and what she wanted to do after graduation.

All the answers Rey had to those many inquiries seemed to please Leia greatly and at one point she shot him a proud nod. It caused him to feel warm all over and he had a hard time focussing on the fact that they weren’t in a real relationship.

However… this would be the kind he’d like to have one day. Someone who would accept his help and guidance when they were needed, but independent enough to function on her own; A woman who was her own person. Rey was capable of spending time on her own, not leaning on him to plan their every move, but was always so eager to be included whenever she thought something might tickle her fancy. He’d like that a lot in a future wife. The idea of that illusive woman not being Rey soured his mood somewhat however.

“The weather is supposed to turn for the worse tomorrow.” Lando stated half an hour later, as they had gathered on the couch to watch TV, but never really concentrating on it. They had settled for Breakfast at Tiffany’s that had already started earlier. It hadn’t really bothered most of them because they had either seen it a million times or would rather be doing something else anyway. Leia, Mally, Rey and Kylo were playing cards, Luke was reading a book, while Chewie and Han were too busy commenting the movie. Lando had been enraptured by his iPad for quite a bit now, having first read Audrey Hepburn’s Wikipedia page –throwing in the occasional ‘Did you know that Audrey once did this or that…’– and afterwards checking on some news, including tomorrow’s weather.

“Nothing too bad, though, right?” Leia asked, looking up from their game of Go Fish!

“Doesn’t look nice, but you know how these things are. They come, they suck, they go.”

“Who treats a cat like that?” Han suddenly snapped as Holly Golightly was chasing poor Cat through her apartment. “That woman belongs in jail, alright!”

“Her brother just died!” Chewie defended the tiny brunette.

“You’ve always been a dog person!” Han accused.

“Anyway,” Leia’s voice rose over their bickering. “the weather?”

Lando was busy moving his fingers over the screen.

“Looks like we’ll be fine until tomorrow around 5, but we should definitely be back at the house by then. Looks like there’ll be lots of snow and you know what that means in the mountains.”

“Hey, we have a rookie among us, so our asses will be back at the house by 3.30! I am not explaining to Rey’s parents how she was lost in some freak-avalanche.” Han raised his own voice, looking at both Rey and Kylo. The girl was smiling at his father’s antics while Kylo rolled his eyes.

“She’ll be with me, dad!” he told the over-protective older man. Despite his objection though, he’d make sure to have her back at the house as soon as he saw a cloud he didn’t like the shape of. Not that he’d admit that!

“You keep your peace, you’ll never get a girlfriend sweeter than that one again, so we’ll all make sure that one remains in one piece!”

Both he and Rey snorted, earning a grin from Han, who turned towards the screen again.

Thus continued a calm evening.

It wasn’t so bad now that he had decided to leave the snooping to those who had made it their life’s work. If the next 36 hours continued on like this, he might actually choose to visit again next year. Maybe even call his mother once in a while.

It was getting late and one by one, the others went to bed until only Leia, Han, Rey and Kylo were left in the living-room.

“I’ll go hit the sack.” Han finally announced, getting up to kiss his wife on the forehead. “Night, kids! And remember; hands above the blankets.”

Kylo groaned, Rey blushed and Leia gave her husband a playful smack on the arm.

“I’ll be with you in a second.” the older woman called after Han before finishing their last round. As they got up, Leia gathered a few cups and nodded to another stack of plates left behind.

“Be– Kylo, would you be a dear and help me carry those to the kitchen?” she asked, brown eyes looking up at him with a soft, pleading expression.

“Sure… I’ll be up in a minute, Rey.”

Rey nodded, hugged his mother goodnight and went upstairs to go change.

Mother and son grabbed cups and plates and went down into the kitchen.

“How is your head? All better?” Leia inquired once more.

“The nap helped, thank you.” he replied as he followed her downstairs. The tiny woman nodded.

“I can imagine that it must be a lot for you to come here and–“

He sat down the dishes in the sink before interrupting his mother.

“Mother. Don’t.” his voice was low but shaky. “It was just a little headache. I didn’t board in years and my muscles were simply tense.”

She nodded.

“It seems that Rey had a great time today.”

“I think so, too. She is a quick learner, so there wasn’t much cause for frustration.” he filled her in, catching the smile that spread over her face.

“I really like that girl, you know? There’s something naturally sweet about her and she appears to have her own head.” Leia commented warmly.

He just snorted.

His mother wasn’t wrong.

“Just… Ben?” suddenly, her voice sounded timid, as if she wasn’t quite certain whether what she was about to say might displease him. “She… seems to be missing her family a lot.”

He was rather dumbstruck by that statement. Probably because he knew that there was no family to be missed.

“What makes you think so?” he wondered aloud.

Her hands grasped one another and she frowned.

“Earlier today, I made a comment about mother’s complimenting their children. I am afraid that I kind of upset her and that she’d much rather be with her parents right now.” she quickly explained.

“Mother–“ he breathed, but stopped himself. Was it really his right to tell her? But surely, his mother wouldn’t go around telling the others. If there was one thing he was certain of, it was the fact that his mother was an exceptional keeper of secrets. “The others can’t know.”

While she looked taken aback, she nodded her consent.

“Rey is an orphan. There is no family she might’ve spent Christmas with instead.”

 

* * *

 

She’d simply offer when he came in!

Even after their little, awkward moment earlier, she didn’t like the thought of him sleeping on the couch again. It wasn’t right. She sat cross-legged on top of the duvet when the door opened a few minutes later. Kylo must’ve taken the opportunity to chat with his mother, because she had already brushed her teeth, washed her face and changed into her pyjamas.

“Hey, you!” she greeted, closing her book and sat a little straighter. “I was wondering… do you snore?”

He looked about as taken aback by the question as someone could be. Kylo tilted his head.

“Why?” he asked, his voice soft and deep and lovel…

_So much for getting a grip!_

“This is a big bed.”

His dark eyes blinked at her.

“Yes?” he replied cautiously, needing her to evaluate on her point.

“I was thinking… We’d both fit in here with no problem at all. And you had a headache and shouldn’t sleep on the couch.” she explained quickly.

He tried to fight a grin on his face.

“And if I snore?” Kylo quipped, walking around the bed towards the bathroom. She got onto her knees, following him with her gaze.

“I’d probably still be too tired to register it.”

Her reply was answered by a low chuckle that sounded way too nice.

“Maz would kill me, Rey.” He stated.

“Oh no, I checked, it’s okay with Maz as long as we don’t have sex.”

That stopped him where he stood. Slowly, he turned towards the bed and placed one knee on it, causing Rey to move a bit closer towards him. His gaze burnt her.

“Are you sure that you’d be comfortable with this? Rey, really, the couch is–“

“I suggested it, so yeah! I’m perfectly alright with it.” here she bit her lip. “And anyways; only bad men sleep on the couch, don’t they?”

 

* * *

 

She’d be the death of him!

First their almost-kiss, now this. Was this a test, instigated by Maz to check whether he could behave himself?

Without answering her, he had rushed into the bathroom to get ready for… the couch? Or the bed?

Could he really do this?

It wasn’t like they’d do anything, right? They were two adults sleeping in a rather large bed. What could go wrong? And if he were completely honest with himself, his back would probably love him forever for not spending another night on the couch. It was one thing to sleep there while being in his 20s. Now in his 30s, he was used to the luxury of a mattress.

They’d sleep!

In case he woke up at some point being too close to her, he could move away onto his side of the bed before she’d know it.

In case she’d snuggle up against him however…

Shit, he really shouldn’t do this when the image of her, pressed against him, head resting on his shoulder as she slept peacefully, warm and safe in his arms sent pleasurable shivers up and down his spine.

He shouldn’t!

He wouldn’t!

Slipping his sleeping shirt over his head, he got out of the bathroom, determined to stalk out of the room, away from temptation, when her pretty, large, and begging eyes met his.

“Kylo?” she breathed, looking tiny and lonely in that big bed.

Oh for fuck’s sake, this was so not what he shouldn’t do.

His hands slipped back the duvet on his side of the bed in no time.

“Lights out, I’m exhausted.” he mumbled and with a sigh, lay down next to a very happy Rey who wished him a good night and sweet dreams.

He just prayed they wouldn’t be _too_ sweet!


	14. Oh, Before the Weather Outside Got Frightful

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU THANK YOU THANK YOU!!!! for all those lovely and kind comments as well as the kudos.  
> I never wrote anything this well-received and am beyond speechless and incapable to tell you how  
> baffled I am by your continued support.   
> Your words mean a lot to me and I truely hope this chapter won't let you down. Disappointing readers  
> like you would make me quite unhappy. 
> 
> This chapter will be a bit steamy. I hope I wrote that part okay ^^"

Chapter 14

 

If he had sweet dreams that night, he couldn’t recall them as he stirred. However, he woke up slowly and gradually, in a cocoon of warm softness and that was all he could ask for, really. This was definitely better than being woken up by the alarm on his phone, set to an ungodly hour so he’d be able to make his way back up to the bedroom before someone might stumble upon him on the couch.

There’d be none of that today and it made him grin tiredly. Today he could savour the warmth of the blanket a little longer and he sighed. While the family-reunion had not turned into the disaster he had feared it might, Kylo had still missed his own bed dearly. But not on this morning! He was warm and comfortable, his limbs still heavy with sleep.

Breathing in deeply while resting on his side, he registered the lovely fragrance that must’ve wrapped itself around him during the night. There was something distinctly feminine about it, though it lacked the artifice of perfume. It held an undertone of airy sweetness that reminded him of the early days of spring.

His eyes blinked a few times as he opened them.

Then he became very still.

Kylo’s heart did not exactly skip a beat, nor did his breath falter. There was, however, a warm something that grew inside him and the constant unease he felt every time someone got too close to him simply settled. It fell silent in awe of the sight before him.

During the night they had turned towards one another so they were now significantly close. Had he stretched his fingers towards her, he would’ve touched her little nose, as she lay huddled under thick sheets.

Rey was still asleep, long, dark lashes resting against what he knew to be incredibly soft skin. Yesterday’s sun had left a subtle tan on her face, causing her pale freckles to darken somewhat. Her skin, it seemed, was far more receptive to the effects of sunlight than his own was. He always made sure to lather his face with sufficient amounts of sunscreen, so he wouldn’t get home with an unpleasant sunburn on his nose.

Warmth radiated from her, tugging at him in the most pleasant way. His fingers itched to reach out and trace the elegant curve of her jaw, lean in to gently nuzzle up the bridge of her nose. The idea of pressing his lips against her soft cheek seized him and he barely caught himself before executing that particular whim. The very tip of his nose grazed hers and, closing his eyes, he slowly shifted his head, barely daring to breathe.

Their lips were so close…

What was he doing?

Slowly, he shifted away, but unwilling to relinquish contact completely, his fingers took hold of a few strands of her brown hair, caressing them, careful not to tug or tangle the soft strands.

She looked serene in her sleep, a small smile on her otherwise relaxed and divine features.

Usually, he’d not been strong enough to withstand kissing a woman as gorgeous as her. The circumstances weren’t usual though. Had she been with him because they were in a real relationship, heck, even if he had picked her up at some bar last night and had somehow enticed her to come home with him, he would not have hesitated to press his lips against hers.

Who could blame him?

She looked good enough to eat, resting there, all warm and perfect.

Alas…

It ate at him, knowing that she was here because he paid her, which was the only reason for him not to wake her and…

_And do what?_

He didn’t even know whether she thought of him the same way that he thought of her. Yes, she had flirted with him yesterday, did not seem wholly adverse to his company. That meant nothing though.

Even if he yearned for the fragile tenderness he hoped not to be a figment of his imagination; nothing could happen. He couldn’t allow it. Not while she was with him because he paid her.  

It was beyond him how men could pay for sex.

He was certain that his pride would never allow him to perform in the first place. What was so intoxicating about exaggerated and fake moans? About a woman acting like she just had the best orgasm of her life when in truth her wetness was the result of some really mediocre lube, not arousal, let alone peaked lust? It made his skin crawl to even think about it. And to think of doing anything comparable to Rey, when he didn’t know whether she wanted him was disgusting.

No, nothing would happen in this bed.

No matter that his body was clearly eager to prove that he’d be very capable of performing all sorts of carnal acts. The kind that would render lube superfluous. He’d be incredibly enthusiastic in making sure of that, picturing himself between those long legs, his tongue a willing contributor to her pleasure. Oh he’d be thorough. Eager to find out whether she did taste as sweet as she smelt.

Yesterday’s brief fantasy came back to him and he felt himself harden as he imagined her voice inviting him to find out whether she tasted like cookies too while spreading those firm thighs in a tantalizingly slow manner, her darkened eyes never leaving his as he slowly brushed his tongue between her full, moist lips, flicking over her hardened little cl…

Yeah, he probably should be leaving the bed now before she woke up to him sporting a raging boner!

Affording himself the luxury of allowing his eyes to linger on her pretty face a little longer, he was startled out of his thoughts by her content sighs. The blink of an eye later she shifted and pressed her face into the nape of his neck.

His whole body now rigid, he desperately tried to calm himself down as her warm breath made contact with his skin. He was glad that he had decided to wear a shirt to bed or any attempt to think of anything but her skin touching his would have proven to be futile.

Kylo knew he had to wake her now. Which meant that he really ought to calm down one clearly excited part of his physique first.

Closing his eyes, he tried not to pay attention to how warm she really was, how right her nuzzling his skin felt or the fact that her soft sighs and whimpers were music to his ears. Music that went straight to his groin.

This was the opposite of calming down, obviously.

Okay, this would stop now. He had to think of something significantly less pleasant. Taxes. Snoke. Snoke in a bathrobe with a too generous neckline that… okay that sufficed to kill the mood and then some.

Taking a deep breath, he places his hand on her shoulder.

“Rey…”

 

* * *

 

Everything was hazy, warm and wonderful.

She could get used to this, her mind slowly drifting out of the pleasant rest she had been enjoying without a hurry. Her heart was pleasantly heavy where it beat within her chest. Her face was pressed into something that smelt musky, masculine and…

Kylo!

Jerking back, tearing herself away from the delightful warmth of his body, she sat up, staring down at him with wide eyes.

“I am so sorry, I–“

“It’s alright.” he quickly calmed her, lifting his upper body by leaning his weight on his elbow while his other hand was hovering between them, palm towards her in a pacifying gesture. Their eyes locked. “Rey. It’s fine.”

Was it?

Was it really fine that she had basically been pressing herself into the warmth and comfort he had procured? After she had basically talked him into sharing the bed with her for sleeping and sleeping only? What he must think of her…

Her worry must’ve been obvious, because he slowly sat up.

“Nothing wrong with being a snuggler, Rey,” he told her, the corner of his mouth lifting into an easy, good-natured smirk.

They stared at one another for a short eternity. The bed beneath her warm and soothing but the very air around her seemed charged with a more precarious heat than the comfort of the sheets that had kept them warm during the night.

Kylo looked flushed –how could he not? His dark hair was attractively ruffled in places, giving him a bit of a roguish charm. That shirt he had worn in bed stretched over the broad planes of his chest, not hiding his exceptional build. A subtle shadow of stubble had started to show on his face. Funny, she hadn’t thought of him with a beard before, his face usually hairless. But there it was now, taunting her, daring her to reach out and run her fingers over the short black hairs on his jaw, his chin and upper lip.

“There isn’t?” she inquired, her voice heavy.

His eyes didn’t leave her, as he remained silent, choosing his words it seemed. Finally, swiping his tongue over his pouty lips to wet them, he leaned back down.

“No. There very much isn’t.” Kylo’s voice was a soothing purr that set her veins on fire.

It was her turn to nervously wet her lips, having her teeth graze the tender skin as she considered saying something incredibly forward, rather lewd and definitely stretching the boundaries of Maz’ rules. Getting onto her hands and knees, she moved a bit closer, his eyes burning into hers.

“In that case…” she hoped she sounded as inviting as she intended and not insecure about what she was doing. “…would you like to snuggle some more?”

She swore his eyes were black, only adding to their intensity. A muscle in his chin twitched.

“I’d like that quite a lot.” His tone had lowered significantly. It drew her in, closer and closer. With a swift movement he lifted the corner of his duvet. “Come here.”

She was straddling his lap before she knew what she was doing, hands resting on his shoulders as he leant back, on his back now. His arms encircled her smaller body, pulling her down, before they shifted down to cup her ass through her pyjama pants.

His body was hot and hard beneath her as Kylo kneaded the supple flesh with Rey gaping down at him in fake-horror.

“You’re quite naughty.” she half reprimanded, half cooed, grinding her lower body against his in a teasing manner, pressing herself into his hands, then back against the stirring hardness the felt growing by the second. His hands moved away from her behind and she whimpered at the loss, leaning her forehead against his shoulder. His warm breath was at her ear.

“Yes, I am.”

With that, large, strong hands slipped beneath her pants, massaging her flesh, pressing her against him. She moaned, burying her face in the nape of his neck as she made to move her hips against that large, bulging cock she knew to be begging for her, his voice causing her to see stars as he began to chant her name far too gently.

Too softly.

“Rey…”

A hand carefully shook her shoulder as she tried to move closer to him.

“Rey… Wake up, sweetheart.”

Wh-What?

Her eyes snapped open and her heart stopped, shocked by the realization of just having had a wet dream about the man who woke her from said dream.

 

* * *

 

When she registered where she was, leaning away from him to stare into his face, an embarrassed blush spread across her pretty face and he smiled at her, incapable of doing otherwise. Rubbing her back in a reassuring manner, he re-adjusted her blanket for her so she wouldn’t be cold. While the house was sufficiently heated during the day, it cooled down during the night when the fires died down and the heating was turned off.

“Good morning.”

She stared at him, her eyes wide and her cheeks still darkening. Her little mouth opened and closed a few times before she squeaked a high pitched, rather endearing “Good morning”.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked in a conversational tone, withdrawing his hand, still smiling at her. Maybe it’d help to just talk for a moment. Her proximity alone made him feel warm and relaxed and he yearned to keep her close just a little bit longer. It was practically innocent. They weren’t touching, nor were they too close for comfort. However, her startled reaction to having snuggled up against him woke another sort of emotion. Rey appeared deeply shaken and he feared that it might’ve been due to the fact that she was horrified by the idea of touching him while not awake.

That she’d rather not touch him at all.

If he planned on pursuing anything with her in the future he’d have to find out whether that was the case or…

Wait.

Did he want to pursue anything with her in the future?

He allowed his eyes to wander over her face, down her elegant neck and back up again.

He’d be a fool not to ask her out.

Properly.

Without money switching hands.

Would she say yes? She was incredibly nice to him whether they were alone or on their own. It was her first time as an escort. First and last if he had anything to say about it. He had read up on the topic after he himself became tangled in it and what he found had disgusted him. Apparently, Maz was the exception when it came to protecting her girls. Articles about parties in exclusive male clubs where escorts and hostesses were treated like dirt, escorts being pressured into sleeping with their clients so they’d spend more, book them more often…

Finding out about this had made him sick to his stomach, which was why he’d be very careful not to push any boundaries Rey might set up at any point of their time together. If she had so much as twitched at a touch or a peck on the cheek or the forehead he’d kept an arm’s length between them for the remaining trip, his parents and their resulting questions be damned.

"Very. Thank you." she mumbled in a small voice, answering his question. "Yourself?"

Kylo nodded.

"Haven't slept this well in years, to be honest. Must've been the fresh air." he suggested.

“We don’t get that in the city, that’s certain.” Rey agreed.

He remembered what Lando had told them yesterday. While the idea of their last day being cooped up in the house did not sound too tempting, it’d be better to warn her now, rather than later. Kylo wouldn’t want her to be disappointed when finding out that her lessons had to be cut short.

"If there's to be bad weather today, we shouldn't leave later than 11 or we won't have enough time to improve your technique."

She frowned at this, giving the impression that she had meant to ask the next question a lot sooner.

"Is it really so bad if it snows a bit more? It has been snowing here and there since we've arrived." she wondered, sitting up slightly to lean onto her elbow.

Explaining to her the dangers of soft snow in the mountains, he realized how she paid attention to his every word. Listing intently, she nodded slowly, then sighed, dropping back down onto her back next to him. Kylo heard her flinch and felt her jerk into a different position.

"Oh God..." she winced.

"What's the matter?" he immediately demanded, worried.

To his surprise, she giggled.

"My ass is killing me!" she laughed, making a face whenever she put too much weight onto her poor behind. Kylo chuckled, reached out and stroked her face with the back of his hand without second thought.

"Let me take a quick shower, I'll draw a bath afterwards. Sounding good?"

"Sounding divine!" she breathed, locking eyes with him. Hers held a warm, soft glow and her smile was easy and relaxed. Rey looked happy.

His chest felt warm when he playfully pinched her cheek, causing her to laugh softly, placing her smaller hand on his wrist.

“I’ll be back in a bit. Don’t fall back asleep.” he warned and drew his hand away.

“No promises.” Rey joked, gathering her duvet towards herself and rolling onto her stomach. “I’ll miss this bed.”

It had been such a small comment. Nothing out of the ordinary. But his mind wouldn’t let go of it. While hot water poured over his back, he kept going over the fact that their hours here were running out. It had been a nice trip. Nicer than he had thought possible to be honest. His parents had tried their best to be pleasant, his uncle, while still a massive piece of work, had not been horrible and Rey… Rey had been making it all a lot easier.

He’d miss having her around.

Crap he needed to figure out whether she’d be alright with continuing their… whatever it was.

 

After he stepped out of the shower, he drew her a bath as promised, wanting her to be better soon. Kylo was still capable of recalling his own suffering on his first few days of boarding and he’d much rather not have her go through it.

“Morning, honey!” his mother greeted as he came down the stairs, busy with setting up a fire. He had decided to leave Rey to her bath after he got dressed, eager not to make things awkward, not now that he wanted things to work out.

“Hey, mom.” he replied, leaning down to press a kiss onto her cheek, surprised by the gesture. The way she smiled told him that so was she. “What are you doing?”

The tiny woman blushed and gave him a sheepish smile.

“I thought I’d– Rey seemed so excited about the fireplace on her first day, so I thought we could all have breakfast up here again, and…” she trailed off at his sigh. “I am sorry, honey, but–“ she shrugged.

“You didn’t tell Han, did you?” he asked, fearing the worst.

She scoffed.

“Don’t be silly, he’d have the adoption papers signed by now and that would make your relationship rather confusing now, wouldn’t it?”

Kylo chuckled.

“So he likes her?” kneeling down next to her, he threw another piece of wood into the fireplace before reaching out for the matches placed between them.

“We all do.” Leia told him, patting his shoulder before she slowly got to her feet, cursing her knees while at it.

There was at least something he agreed on with his family.

Hell must’ve frozen over at last!

 

* * *

 

The fire in the fireplace made her smile as she walked towards the table where everyone had sat down for breakfast. Her hair was gathered in a messy bun, still not dry due to the fact that her stomach insisted on being filled, her wish to look her best a tiny insignificant detail.

When Leia saw her coming, she said something to Kylo, who got up –clearly amused.

“I’ve made a full English breakfast, this morning. Ben is getting your bacon.” The older woman told her with a smile. “Tell me if I messed it up, will you?”

Rey grinned.

“My friend Finn attempted making one for us once. I am certain yours will be better, Leia.”

Kylo placed a plate with warm bacon before her and she reached for the pot in front of her, finding baked beans in it.

“You went all the way.” she giggled delightedly, helping herself.

“It’s your last day here. We probably won’t have time to make such a big breakfast tomorrow, so this was my last chance.” Leia shrugged, smiling happily and drank her coffee.

“How are your muscles, Rey?” Kylo asked, grabbed a toast and put some bacon on it.

“Better, thank you, but I’ll have to be careful not to break by falling today.”

Han and Chewie laughed.

“And that’s why I am staying in today.” the older man announced.

“You didn’t come along yesterday, either, you sloth.” Leia told her husband off. “Too busy working on that trashcan.”

“You leave that trashcan alone, princess. You owe it–“

“If you make one more reference to how I was conceived, I’m taking that piece of junk on a joyride later.” Kylo growled, interrupting his father.

Han looked appalled.

“You people have no appreciation for vintage cars!” the man bemoaned, glaring at his family.

“Vintage ones; yes. Ancient rust-buckets; no!” Leia mumbled and Rey was happy to see Kylo grin at his mother.

“Look at you, knowing the word ‘vintage’, Mr Fancypants.” Luke teased, causing Kylo to snort into his coffee.

Today would be a wonderful last day, she was certain.

 

Everything about her expectation proved to be correct so far. The sky showed no signs of foul weather, though it was a bit colder than yesterday. Indeed, the snow around them sparkled in the soft winter sun as they drove through the mountains. Luke, Lando and Han were staying behind today, but Chewie had insisted on coming along. The prospect of a snow-storm and thus being incapable of leaving the house to go skiing had him especially enthusiastic. He was whistling some song Rey didn’t recognize.

“You kids looking forward to being back in the city?” he asked in that heavy accent Rey couldn’t quite place.

“Not really. It’s nice here.” Rey told him with a smile. While she missed her friends, their absence was the only aspect that rendered this trip slightly imperfect. Everything else had been to her liking. Leia and Han had been kind hosts, Mally, Lando and Chewie had been fun to meet and Luke… well, he certainly had made the whole trip rather interesting. Kylo of course had played an integral part in her happiness here. Yes, she had been incredibly nervous when they had travelled here, partly because he had been too. Whenever he relaxed and calmed down long enough to enjoy himself, he had turned out to be a very pleasant and even patient man.

She had soon started to like him and seeing him as he was then, chatting with his mother when he could not have been bothered to look at the woman for longer than two seconds on his first day here… it made her feel warm and happy for his sake.

He also told Chewie that he didn’t really look forward to being back in New York either. When his eyes met hers, she felt herself blush and averted her gaze.

She’d miss him.

It had become normal to spend the day with him and he had been too gentle a giant not to grow extremely fond of him. The still fresh memory of her rather explicit dream had her blush some more and she suddenly felt very interested in the view.

 

* * *

 

“Smile for me!” Leia cheered when they were assembled on top of the mountain to take a picture with her old digital camera. His mother didn’t like taking pictures with her phone, preferring to take the camera she had been using since around 2012 along wherever she went.

They all beamed at her and then tried to get going, but Leia interrupted them once more.

“I want one of Ben and Rey!” she insisted. Everyone moved aside while Rey and Kylo got together, standing side by side.

“Sorry.” he mumbled softly, but was only met by her shaking her head while smiling brightly. Suddenly, the air around them warmed up it seemed, because he felt his body warm up all over, unable not to smile down at the pretty woman.

“Put an arm around her!” Leia demanded.

“Kiss the girl!” Chewie hollered, raising his fist into the air.

Rolling his eyes, Kylo placed an arm around Rey’s shoulders, drawing her close. Stumbling slightly, she chuckled, looking up at him.

“Careful there or we’ll tumble down the mountain.” she reprimanded.

Snorting, he apologized and as they were once more smiling for the camera, his mother took a few shots of them.

He’d make sure to get his hands on those pictures. Even if she did not feel the way he felt about her, he’d like to have a little something of her. At least until he’d be over her once she informed him that it had all been an act.

 _Don’t think like that!,_ he hissed at himself.

He’d have to remain optimistic about things. Maybe she’d be willing to restart their acquaintance under different circumstances. They got along well, didn’t they? Surely, it wouldn’t be ridiculous to hope for a second beginning. He’d like to do this right and it shocked him. When he had boarded that plane a few days ago, he had not even thought about the possibility of their trip to result in him considering to pursue an actual relationship with the woman who acted as his girlfriend to create a diversion.

Yet here he was, trying to make up his mind as to when to address the issue.

He didn’t like the idea of asking on the plane. It might come across like a proposition to upkeep their business association, which he very much didn’t want! Maybe he could ask her tonight, before going to sleep? It would be proper to do it then, he figured. Obviously, she was more to him than just a girl he’d want to forget when they stepped off that plane in New York. It would be her choice whether she wanted to sleep next to a man who was…

Before bed bad sounded good to him, he interrupted his own musings.

He’d have been lying had he claimed that it didn’t make him extremely nervous.

 

Today, Rey was doing a lot better than yesterday and while they were left behind by the others who were capable of getting down the mountain far quicker than them, he was proud of her progress. They might even be able to get down and up twice today, despite the impending bad weather.

It didn’t bother him too much. Aspen was used to foul weather and sudden amounts of new snow. He had taken the time to check in with their airline. Yes, –he had been told by a chipper young man– they had heard about some new and probably rather excessive snowfalls to take place in the late afternoon, but the airport being incredibly well prepared for that, he had been assured that everything would be cleared by tomorrow. Knowing there’d be no issue with their flight back home had calmed him. They’d spend the evening by packing their suitcases, eating and having his mother fuss over them.

Ever since she had heard about Rey’s parents having left her behind as a child, his mother had thrown all her powers into pleasing the younger woman. The choice of today’s breakfast and the fire had only been a start. She had instructed Han to light the fire in their bedroom around four in the afternoon, had offered Rey a large amount of Christmas biscuits to take home with her and had kept close to her most of the time, re-adjusting her scarf to make sure she remained warm and hugging her often and out of nowhere.

It had made him anxious, fearing that she might give anything away. But it appeared, that Leia was incredibly willing to keep both him and Rey close by, so it would be logical to suppose that she was just using their final hours together to her heart’s content.

“Try to relax Rey, you look too stiff from back here.” he warned his young pupil.

“I am trying not to fall.” she yelled and he chuckled, hoping she didn’t hear him.

“You’re doing very well, we’re almost at the hut.”

“Already?” her surprise carried through the air and made him smile in something that wasn’t quite amusement.

“Told you, you’re doing well.”

As they arrived at the hut and he allowed his eyes to drift over the mountains on the other side of the city, his stomach dropped.

There were clouds at the horizon and they looked like serious trouble.

Chewie, Mally and his mother had waited for them at the hut and appeared just as suspicious of the weather as him as they joined them.

“I think we’ll make it down in time before it gets bad.” Chewie grumbled, glaring at the dark shades. “But we shouldn’t get up again, I think that will spoil a perfectly good day.”

Mally nodded.

“Better safe than sorry.” she said in a calm voice and sent Rey a sad smile. “You won’t like the mountains once they’re out of humour.”

Around them people were getting ready to leave. Parents were busy shepherding their kids towards the lifts or down the mountain. Groups were in a hurry to leave the hut and get to the foot of the mountain.

Rey glanced around, appearing to be a bit intimidated by the amount of almost frantic movement.

“We’re not in danger are we?” she whispered, tugging at his jacket to get his attention.

He shook his head.

“Not if we get down there in time, which will be no problem. So don’t push yourself too hard. There’ll be a lot of people, but I want you to concentrate on yourself. Okay? I’ll take care of you.” He promised, squeezing her shoulder gently.

As she nodded at him, her brows drew together in a determined way, her mouth drawn into a soft pout.

Kylo remained behind her, while Leia kept close to both of them this time. Chewie and Mally were going in front of Rey, which probably calmed her down a bit. His eyes never left her, while he shielded her from other people who were speeding down the mountain.

The sky darkened around fifteen minutes later, snow beginning to fall not two minutes after that. When she sent him a worried glance, he sped towards Rey, telling her that they were almost there which calmed her somewhat.

A patrol passed them on a snow mobile, obviously on their way up towards the hut to warn everyone foolish enough to ignore the weather that they’d have to take the lifts to get down from the mountain.

When they reached the car around twenty minutes later they could barely see three metres ahead of them and he was thankful that they’d made their way down the mountain when they had. A small hand grasped his and –instinctively– he placed an arm around Rey, pulling her close.

“This is scary… Do you think everyone got down okay? There were so many kids.” Her voice was shaky, probably not only due to the sudden temperature drop. Up here, the weather could be a terrifying thing. The fact that children she didn’t even know occupied her mind made him pull her into a hug.

“The patrols we saw will have made sure of it.” he assured her, opening the door of the car and helped her in. Chewie and he quickly stored their skis and boards and off they went. Careful, slowly and –in Rey’s case– more than a bit shaken by the sudden change of atmosphere.

“That escalated quickly, eh?” Mally joked, patting Rey’s shoulder to cheer the younger woman up. “Don’t worry, dear. It is normal. You’ll see, an hour from now it’ll be all blue skies again.”

“Dunno about that, gorgeous. Those clouds did not look friendly. Or small.” Chewie sighed in the driver’s seat. Leia, while a good driver, lacked the experience with driving during conditions such as these. Turning back in the front seat, Kylo extended a hand towards Rey, who eagerly grasped it.

“Too exciting for you?” he asked, his thumb drawing calming circles into the back of her hand.

“I think it’s safe to say that Rey won’t consider skiing to be boring anytime soon.” Leia quipped, but was obviously just as uneasy about the darkness created by the masses of snowflakes around them, but unwilling to worry Rey even more.

“I think I’d prefer boredom right now.” Rey tried to joke. “It’s so dark.”

She wasn’t wrong. In front of them they could see the backlights of other cars that slowly made their way back home, but apart from that there were few to no pointers as to where they were.

“You think we’ll get home okay, uncle Furry?” he wondered a few minutes later in a low tone.

“I think you’re too old to get away with calling me that.” Chewie informed him dryly, before his face broke into a smirk. “But yeah, we’ll be good. I drove in worse weather.”

That calmed him more than anything. If Chewie said he’d get them home in one piece, they’d get home in one piece.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, yes, I know!   
> The kiss is coming. And soon.   
> Promise!  
> Don't be mad D:


	15. Somehow I Snitched on Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am so sorry for the late update! I had a violent migraine shortly after posting the last chapter   
> and it threw me off for three days. Thank you guys so, so much for all the lovely comments on the   
> last chapter and I apologize for all the teasing. Reading them put a smile on my face while I was  
> recovering, so big hugs to everyone who took the time to leave a few words. You guys are amazing!
> 
> This chapter is the last chapter before the big event you've all been waiting for. Yes, there will be a  
> kiss or twenty in the next chapter!!!! 
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy this chapter, though it is a bit rocky for our favourite nerds in love. 
> 
> Happy Valentine's Day, lovelies :)

Chapter 15

 

Mally had been wrong.

Two hours after they had returned from their slow way home, there was no sign of the weather getting any better. Indeed, the wind had picked up strength, pushing against the windows of the house, causing Rey to jump from time to time. Kylo’s glares became more vicious as time progressed and he seemed to loathe every single snowflake out there like their mere sight was an insult to him

Rey couldn’t blame the man who was becoming a looming shadow by the window. While she hadn’t thought it likely that she’d ever be sick of snow in this idyllic wilderness, she’d very much prefer the weather to calm down. Both were dressed in dry clothes and dinner would be ready soon, so she’d rather have him relax as she was attempting to do.

Eventually, he sighed and turned around, walking away from the window to throw a few more things into his suitcase, which he had placed on one of the chairs.

“There better not be an ice storm tonight.” she heard him mumble more to himself than directing the comment at her.

“Surely it’s too cold for rain?” she wondered aloud, but he just shook his head.

“We should be fine if it remains this cold but if any warm air gets over those mountains we’re screwed.” he growled, obviously in a very shitty mood.

“You’re worried about our flight?”

At that he turned towards her.

“Of course I am.” Kylo answered as if it was obvious, then turned away once more.

Biting her lip, she made to comment on something, anything when he pushed away from where he was standing. “Let’s just hope the airport staff is capable of clearing the airstrip or we’ll be fucking stuck here.”

That would suck indeed. Finn, Rose and Paige would be back on the 27th and she’d have a lot of explaining to do in case she wasn’t back at the apartment before they were.

“They told you it’d be fine, so don’t worry.” She reminded him, an encouraging smile on her face but only receiving a huff.

“I wished I had your trust in people’s competence.”

He was now glaring daggers at the fireplace and the warm flames dancing in it. Snorting, she tugged at his pant leg, trying to get his attention and succeeding. The glare was pushed aside by befuddlement, an expression that suited him rather well.

“Calm down, Kylo. You don’t know whether there’ll be a problem, so there’s no sense in to getting upset now.”

With a long sigh, he dropped onto the bed, with her sitting on the ground, closer to the fire. It had been his main concern to get her warm again when she had appeared to be rather shaken by the happenings of the afternoon. Apparently he had thought her to be cold when in reality she had just been a bit silly about the sudden change of weather.

“You should start packing before going down for dinner. We don’t want to be late tomorrow, do we?” he said after a few moments of silence during which she had watched him stare into the flames with what she’d call a solemn expression.

“That’s the spirit.” she cheered and got up, patting his knee and made to walk towards the closet, but was held back by his voice.

“R-Rey?”

 

\--

 

He’d just ask!

His mood was bad to begin with, if she rejected him now, it could barely get worse. Despite her easy attitude and optimistic view of the situation, the weather bothered him. Yes, airports were probably well equipped to deal with a bit of snow. But this was a fuck-ton of snow and her positive thoughts would not divert worse weather if it were headed for them, nor would she melt all this snow with that bright smile of hers.

Kylo had to get back to New York or Snoke would have two reasons to have his head. The fact that Rey too would probably face problems had him wonder about her calmness and he secretly envied her about it. He had seen her work on sketches and make notes after reading in a few books she had brought along. Art studies weren’t just drawing and painting it seemed, though he had always supposed so. Quite incorrectly as it turned out, because he had peaked into one of her books on art history yesterday.

He’d have to ask her out before his mood turned worse.

“Hm?”

The noise had him snap out of his thoughts as she stood a few paces away, waiting or him to say what was on his mind. The fire had created a lovely flush on her skin and he felt so much calmer, knowing that she must feel warmer now that she had been in front of the fireplace that had excited her so much on their first day here.

“I– Could you come here and sit for a second?”

Rubbing his hands between his spread legs as she did as asked, Kylo bit his bottom lip.

 _Just ask! Tell her that she ought to feel no obligation to say yes_., he frantically thought. His heart felt heavy, his throat was dry.

“Everything okay?” she sounded worried now, shit that’s not what he wanted. “Did I do something wrong?”

“No!” he croaked, grabbing her tiny hand in his. “No, you were all around perfect– today. And the last couple of days. I am sure you always are to be honest…”

When did he turn into a blubbering idiot of 17 again? During his youth, when he had still gone by the name of Ben Solo, he had been helpless, clueless and completely ridiculous around girls. His first kiss had happened when he had been 19 and already in college, during a round of spin the bottle. After that it had gotten a bit easier. Nobody seemed to make a big deal out of kissing, not like back in high school when girls had been all the boys in Luke’s academy had talked about. It had stressed him out, so everything he had managed to accomplish with a girl was holding her hand as they had set out to a hiking trip back in 8th grade. His teenage years had been lonely, but when he had realized that it really wasn’t that big of a deal, he had relaxed. Thankfully, he had somehow managed to sleep with a girl before he turned 20! Not that he told any of his friends that it had been his first time. Now, faced with Rey’s wide eyes, pre-sex, pre-kiss Ben emerged again at a moment when it couldn’t be less convenient.

The sweet smile that spread on her face destroyed his anxiety though, funny as that sounded. There was a quality about her smile that never failed to soothe him.

“I’m glad you’re pleased. I’ve got to admit that I wasn’t certain what I was doing at some points.” She blushed, averting her gaze.

“You’re a natural.” He blurted out and she gave him a rather scandalized look, her brows pulling into a frown as her mouth opened. “N-Not like that. As a girlfriend! I think you’re a great girlfriend– person! You’re awesome.”

His hand reached out to pat her shoulder and why the hell did he just do that? It was more like a gesture he –or someone who had the habit of patting people– would use to praise good work, definitely not when planning to ask someone out.

Her expression somewhat shifted from mild anger to confusion and he could see why. He was making a mess of this!

“Thank you?!” she even sounded bewildered as she slowly thanked him, tilting her head.

The urge to bury his face in his hands became almost irresistible and he took a deep breath to supress it.

“I enjoyed our time together, is what I meant to say.” Her smile returned at that and it gave him courage to proceed. “In fact I was wondering if you could imagine to go out with me? Like– a real date? Without money changing hands? I will of course pay for drinks, but that’s it. Unless we’d get food. Mom would kill me if I allowed a girl to pay the bill.” His voice rumbled and stumbled as he asked her out. At some instance, his eyes drifted away from her, incapable to look at her while talking, hoping it might help –in vain. “You can say no! Well, of course you can, you’re a grown woman, I just… wouldn’t be mad. I wouldn’t care!”

It would be really nice of some higher force to have the roof collapse on him, he figured then. Just him, for that matter. Missing Rey by a few inches, leaving her unharmed and glad that she didn’t have to listen to the nonsense he was spouting anymore.

“You wouldn’t care?” she sounded incredulous and finally he sat up, turning towards her again.

“Of course I’d care, I just don’t want you to agree on a date because you feel bad or pressured or something.” He sighed. “I mean, I do know this is so not what we agreed on, but we never talked about it and Maz will probably have a few thoughts on that I am certain, but…”

A hand on his thigh shut him up immediately. He stared at her pale fingers on the dark fabric of his jeans and swallowed.

There’d be no hard feelings. He’d reject himself in her position, too, especially after that speech!

“I’d like that.”

Oka- What?

“What?” Oh, the eloquence he wielded! Must be the old Solo-wittiness resurfacing. “R-Really?”

Her smile almost blinded him as she nodded and he swore his limbs never felt lighter.

She laughed softly, her eyes sparkling warmly and he felt himself blush, the tips of his ears suddenly feeling warm. Absentmindedly he wondered whether…

“Did anyone ever tell you that the tips of your ears blush along with the rest of your face?” she inquired, reaching out to allow the back of her finger to slide over the curve of one of his absurd ears. He stilled and almost jerked away from her touch but didn’t dare to break the physical contact. It had been a while since someone had touched him like this; gently, careful and a little sheepish –if her own little blush was anything to go by.

“Y-yeah.” he muttered rather dumbly. “They are large, I know.”

“I like them.” Rey admitted and his heart did a little jump, his features warming up some more as he tried to keep a grip on the smile that threatened to spread on his face. Kylo didn’t like his smile, especially the ones he had no control over. He always thought of himself looking rather goofy whenever he wasn’t careful.

“I like you.” he told her, feeling brave, but found himself holding his breath once it had slipped out.

“Good.” her voice was soft, a whisper almost. “That’s good.”

His throat felt dry as he swallowed.

“It is?” he wondered, his voice a husky and low rumble. Searching her eyes for doubt or worry. Nodding, she reached out to take his hand in hers. It was a little cold, so he immediately covered it with both of his, causing her to smile.

 

\--

 

Her hands were by no means dainty. Hard work had strengthened her fingers so they weren’t slim and elegant by a long shot. Yet, between his palms they looked like those of a child; tiny and fragile. Slowly, he began to rub it, possibly to warm it up more effectively, in addition to his own hands being wonderfully warm. The gesture was incredibly comforting, though it didn’t do anything to calm down her frantic heart. His eyes never left hers and she felt lightheaded. A tender glow warmed his orbs and she founder herself fight the urge to lean her forehead against his cheek to seek his proximity.

“Why is that?” his deep voice helped warming her along with his large hands. However, it caused more of a heavy heat to erupt inside of her, not helping her to remain calm at all. She needed to get herself together.

_Just breathe! In and out. That always helps. Don’t think about how wonderful he smells or how wonderful those large hands would feel against…_

She was no big help in calming herself obviously, so she took the advice she had been given again and again by several people; breathing in deeply. The breath she took was more of a shuddering mess and she worried that it might turn into a pitiful sigh upon exhaling as his fragrance invaded her senses.

“Well…” her eyes left his for a second to linger on his full lips before she could stop herself. “I– I like you, too.”

He leaned in, a small smile tugging at those delicious looking lips.

 _Oh God, stop looking at his mouth!_ , she snapped at herself. _His eyes are up there!_

“That’s convenient.” Kylo joked lightly, the small grin still present as his nose gently nudged hers. “Always a good precondition when going on a date, I hear.”

This made her smile, despite the heady situation and she dared to playfully nudge his cheek with her nose. Their eyes met before she moved a little closer to him still. It didn’t improve her feeling lightheaded, but at least she knew now that she could hold onto him, her hands against those warm and firm shoulders.

“Hey lovebirds!”

Han’s voice had the weird effect of them moving away from one another with the speed of light. Both stared at the man as he stood in the door with his arms crossed. Rey’s surprise at his sudden appearance caused her to blush and blanch at the same time somehow.

“I would’ve knocked, but the door was open.” the older man joked with a big smirk on his face. “You kids have a lot to learn if I’m ever to have grandkids.”

Rey snorted while Kylo blushed a deep crimson and snapped at his dad who chuckled, and –while turning away– informed them that dinner was ready.

“So much for the grandkids-talk being too soon after three months of dating.” she whispered while holding back a fit of giggles. It was answered by an embarrassed groan that made her lose control over her laughter.

A few minutes later they all sat down at the table, helping themselves to mashed potatoes, peas and steak, the tips of Kylo’s ears still an angry shade of vermillion, while Han apologized. Not to the two of them! He was having a wonderful time telling Leia how sorry he was that dinner had interrupted what might’ve been the conception of their grandchild.

“And knowing the Skywalker genes, twins are a realistic option, so you see how badly I messed up here.”

“I dunno about that. Ben was an only-child.” Lando joked but was immediately silenced by the glare Kylo sent his way. “Sorry, I mean; Kylo was an only child!” he winked at the younger man.

Leia spluttered into her drink.

“Enough now.” she admonished, causing her son to turn his head towards her.

“Thanks, mom!” he sounded relieved and Rey covered his hand with hers, grinning. He was so wonderfully relaxed around them now. Leia’s pretty eyes sparkled.

“I’ll never get grandkids if you scare Rey away!” the older woman destroyed the effect of her words by making everyone laugh. Then she smiled at her son. “Sorry, sweety! Mommy is just kidding.”

His jaw moved in a disgruntled fashion, lips turning into a pout that Rey thought rather adorable. Squeezing his hand, she leaned her head onto his shoulder.

“We’re spending next Christmas in New York!” he growled, shoving his fork into his mouth.

“Oh how lovely, you hear that Leia? Christmas in the big city next year!” Han commented, obviously in a good mood.

“You can’t go skiing in New York.” Rey argued.

“Maybe, but you don’t have to worry about such weather either.” Chewie sighed before sipping on his beer. “Are you certain your flight will be leaving as planned tomorrow?”

Kylo nodded as Rey turned her attention to her dinner. It was delicious and she’d really miss Leia and Han’s cooking skills. Her and the others tried hard, but none of them had the money to afford such excellent food every night of the week.

“I checked with the airline earlier today, they said it’d be no problem.” he explained to Chewie before taking another bite of his steak.

“How are you getting to the airport, dear?” Leia inquired while cutting the meat.

“I’ve ordered a car to pick us up at eleven. That should leave us with enough time to get to the airport. I can do most of the check-in stuff during the ride there, that should safe us some time.” he told her in a voice that didn’t suggest any worries it might not work out as planned and she nodded.

“I love that you can get most of it done online these days. Remember that one time, when we all travelled to Japan and we had to be there –what?– 4 hours before our flight even left? Ridiculous, I don’t miss it.” she sighed. “Though security is slowing it down these days of course.”

“When are you taking off?” Han asked then and Kylo answered, causing the man to nod slowly.

“Let’s hope it’ll stop snowing soon then.” Luke offered and Mally nodded.

“Ah well, even if it doesn’t, it won’t be so bad will it?” Han suddenly said, finishing his plate and reaching for seconds.

“It will be, though. I’ve got to be back at work on the 28th and if it keeps up like this, I’m afraid the plane won’t go anywhere.” Kylo commented without looking up.

Han scoffed.

“Han.” Leia warned softly and Rey felt the mood shift without a warning. Kylo’s eyes turned towards his father.

“What do you mean–?” he imitated the older man’s scoff here.

“He didn’t mean anything by it.” Luke attempted to smooth things over. “I’ll go get myself a beer. Han, another for you?”

“That skinny bastard surely can handle himself for a little bit longer in case something goes wrong. He did so for the first 600 years and he’ll probably continue to do so after we’re all rotting in our graves.” the elder Solo growled, sounding a lot like his son when he was in a sour mood. “Or does he simply miss bossing you around like some clueless puppy?”

Kylo’s hand clenched into a fist beneath Rey’s fingers and she drew her arm away, turning her eyes towards Leia who met her gaze.

“Han, that’s enough. We all have to work and it is inconvenient when schedules don’t work out. You and I have both been there.” Leia told her husband in a stern voice that indicated that the two of them had talked about the issue of Snoke and had come to an agreement Han wasn’t sticking to.

“Oh no, mom, it’s fine.” Kylo’s voice was horrible. Calm, collected and far too cutting. “How about you tell me more about my work? Got some comments on my life as a whole, too? It’d be thrilling to hear them.”

“Kylo…” Rey attempted to calm him with a hand on his shoulder, but he ignored it, eyes set on his father.

“Oh come on, you probably have to ask before taking a piss!”

“Buddy, that’s enough.” Lando tried with a firm voice, Chewie resting a hand on Leia’s back as he spoke. The tiny woman had buried her face in her hand and Rey felt incredibly bad for her. “Let’s go get desserts for everyone and calm down while at it, okay?”

“I heard stories about that fine boss of yours!” Han snapped pointing his finger at his son, whose lips were pressed into an angry line.

“Oh I know how much you all love rumours and stories but when your own son comes to tell you that his fucking uncle is busy screwing him over it’s _‘I don’t understand this academic mumbo jumbo!’_.” Kylo was on his feet now, as was Han and they were both raising their voices with every word that left their mouths until they were yelling at each other over the table. Rey stared at them in horror unable to understand where and why it had all gone awry.

“Tell me, did you have to ask that conniving asshole whether you could come here?” Han mocked, while Leia seemed to search for words that might shut both of them up.

“For your information; he encouraged it!”

“What for? To spy on us? Tell him everything about the size of our Christmas dinner so he can accuse your mother of an extravagant way of living when she announces to be running for office?” the older Solo accused and suddenly Kylo got very, very quiet and stood like a rigid pillar as he gaped at his father.

 

\--

 

It blew the air right out of him.

How had he known that Snoke…? No, he couldn’t know, right? And what was that about his mother running for office? That was news to him.

Kylo felt a set of dark eyes on him, when his mother stared up at her son. She had always known when he was caught in a lie. He had always been shit at lying, which had been why she had been more than a bit surprised when he had insisted on a career in law.

She knew.

She knew and he had to say something, anything to divert the situation. Yet the heavy silence strangled him, had him panic as emotions flickered over his mother’s face. No words came to him and even if he had somehow thought of something to say, his chest and throat felt too tight to speak, like air being squeezed right out of him.

“Han.” Leia Organa’s voice was firm and quiet as it sliced through the perplexed silence of the room that had been filled by angry shouts a second ago. “I will go and get the ice-cream now. And when I’m back, you two will have apologized and sat down like civilized people.”

Rising from her chair like a displeased monarch, she made her way towards the stairs.

“That boy knows his boss is a cunt.” Han growled and sat back down, not meeting anyone’s gaze. That did it! Once more, a red fog laid itself over his eyes. He didn’t realize that his mother had yelled at his father to shut up, barely felt the chair graze his thigh as he took a step back, never even hearing it fall when he tossed it back with a kick.

“Fuck! You!” he yelled into his father’s face, while Han ignored him and simply stared ahead at the table as his son whirled around and stormed up the stairs.

He needed to be away from these people!

His mother’s gaze would not leave him alone, the idea of her reading him like an open book more than a little unsettling, especially now. It bothered him.

However, he wondered whether her finding out about the plan to spy on her or her lack of surprise was more unsettling.

Why could no one in this fucking family ever keep their big mouths shut?

After he had slammed the door to their room shut behind him, Kylo felt like breaking something. Instead he rushed out onto the balcony, needing fresh air, unwilling to remain in the house. The heat of his anger ate at him, while the image of his mother’s unwavering gaze had him shiver. He barely felt the cold air that hit his face as he stood there, staring at the white air, his heaving chest soon pressing out an angry snarl.

These fucking mountains!

Of course it had all been a ruse. These people didn’t care about him one bit more than all those years ago. Han still judged him for having seized the only opportunity he had been given after Luke had betrayed him. It had been a great option! Not what he had dreamt of all those years of dedicated work, but it had been an important opportunity. Not that he had had many left after his uncle had pulled that little stunt with his diploma.

It was all Luke’s fault!

His fist collided with the top of the wooden balustrade. He had no sense for pain or discomfort whatsoever, all he remained sensible of was the heat inside of him, which was followed by a sinking feeling in the pit of his stomach and that heavy pulse inside his chest.

Guilt.

His ears were ringing with Han’s accusation and Leia’s silent reaction to having caught onto him was threatening to bring tears to his eyes. If only she would’ve yelled at him for having betrayed her confidence and trust. He would’ve preferred that to the acceptance of the situation, though he really wasn’t sure about what would happen before leaving tomorrow. Han wouldn’t have remained silent! The man had issues with keeping his mouth shut on a daily basis anyway.

But his mother…

 

\--

 

She didn’t know what to do.

Going after him did not strike her as a good idea at the moment, not while he was so angry. In her experience, this was when you ought to make yourself scarce. Since he had done it before she could run and hide herself, Rey was caught in the living-room for now. Leia and Han hadn’t talked during dessert, not that they ate any.

The others had eaten their portion of ice-cream rather awkwardly, nobody daring to comment on anything, let alone address Kylo’s parents.

Rey was careful about every movement of hers, eager not to draw any attention onto herself. At first she hadn’t even dared to look up. Were they going to yell at each other next? Leia had looked incredibly angry when she had come back.

After the meal was over, everyone seemed eager to get to their rooms, with the exception of Luke, Leia, Han and Rey. Luke eyed her sympathetically, while Leia began to gather the dishes and Han simply sat there.

“No please, don’t make yourself useful for once!” Leia hissed, turning her head towards Han, but making Rey jump into action instead. She made to grab a few glasses when Luke’s hand covered hers. Having rounded the table to come and sit next to her, both were silent as Leia stomped off.

“It’s alright, Rey, she didn’t mean you.” he told her in a low voice.

“Oh, shut up, Luke!” Han snapped.

“Don’t start with Luke now!” Rey started at Leia’s loud, angry voice, never really having heard her talk like that. Angry, unapproachable and definitely not to be trifled with.

“I’d suggest a long walk but the weather doesn’t look friendly.” Luke sighed, sending her a pitiful smile.

As Han jumped up from the table, storming after his wife, their gazes followed his movements and Rey flinched.

“By comparison it’s beginning to look better outside if you ask me…” she whispered, biting her lip. When the yelling from downstairs carried up and Rey sent him a doubtful glance, Luke turned his gaze towards the window-front showing the garden. Or it would’ve, if there had been anything visible but the white fog like mass of snowflakes. Slowly, but gradually, the lower part of the glass became blocked by the fresh amounts of snow.

“Dunno about that…” he joked as the voices became louder once more and he made a face. “Care for a friendly game of billiards up in the game room?”

“Can we just leave them to it?” Rey worried about the current situation and while she didn’t like the idea of getting between the two while fighting, she’d rather try and help calm things down. Yes, it did make her uncomfortable, but simply acting like it wasn’t happening wasn’t an option she had even considered.

Luke sighed again, and Rey couldn’t help but wonder why the day had taken such a terrible turn.


	16. Seems Like Everyone AND Me Is In Love

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kisses for everyone (ups... spoiler) and sorry for the wait!  
> My health hasn't been the best. Another migraine followed by a bad cold made writing hard and I had problems finding a proper way to kicking off this chapter without blowing it out of proportions. Especially since I wanted something good to happen to those crazy kids. I really hope I wrote the kiss okay. It truely has been a while since I wrote romance, including kissing and while I read a lot of fic, I don't want to simply write a cheap knock-off. Anyway, I hope it was worth the wait and that I didn't make a mess of it. 
> 
> Thanks again for your sweet comments and the continued support for this fic.   
> You guys keep this thing going :)

Chapter 16

 

Showers had helped clearing his head since he could remember. There was something to be said about the calming effect of hot water pouring down on him, draining away distracting thoughts and allowing him to determine what was important. Now, after a long, gruelling conversation, which had consisted of a lot of yelling, accusations and anger on his side, he felt the ever-present weight on his shoulders to be lifted while another had been placed there almost simultaneously.

Luke had been calm almost the whole duration of their discussion. They hadn’t talked this long in years, neither had he thought it likely that they ever would exchange more than a few forced words. Small-talk hadn’t appeared to be a part of their future, nor were the deep conversations that they used to have in the past something that was likely to re-emerge.

The questions his uncle had shot at him, had left him speechless, his head empty after he had cursed the man who had simply taken the vicious onslaught of –what he had known to be– righteous accusations and insults.

For the first time they had faced off. Back when he had been at a crossroads as to which career choices he ought to pursue, he had applied for several grad programs as well as positions in legal firms. Snoke’s big agency had been one of them due to the fact that one of his professors had recommended that grad program to him. Not that it had always been his goal to work with big corporations! What he had really wanted to do, was to pursue a career that would help people. With his parents engaged in the good fight, he had always dreamt of joining them in one way or another and as a lawyer working for –say– LHR he could’ve assisted their efforts in making the world a better, safer place quite effectively. Or so he had hoped back then.

Of course, he hadn’t counted on being accepted on his first try, despite his ties with the Skywalkers. Figuring that a year or two in another work-environment might’ve prepared him just as well to stand in court and fight for what was right, he had thought it logical to try the more commercial route.

His mother had not been happy when he had told her about the application he sent Snoke’s way. The man –in her estimation– was bad news. As it turned out, Snoke had been perfectly aware of his mother’s opinion of him. During the personal interview he had been invited to only a week after having sent his application, the man had expressed his respect for his mother and her work, but that they had crossed paths on different sides of the battlefield, which he regretted, as he had assured Ben Solo repeatedly.

“We all make mistakes and –sadly– aren’t always capable of choosing our clients.” Snoke had told him, looking grieved. “I admit to having had clients in the past who were connected to some atrocities. But now that I have my own legal firm and am no longer forced to take on clients I know to be involved in illegal goings on, I am certain that your mother would approve of me –if she were able to let the past die, that is.”

Still remembering the man’s tired sigh, Kylo leaned his head against the warmed tiles of the shower. It had sounded quite like his mother, who had always been rather stubborn once she held a grudge. Back then, he hadn’t known what had happened to have these two on opposite sides, but the list of clients Snoke had shown him and his attempts to put him at ease about any and every second thought about the clients he’d be working with in case he was accepted, had impressed him. People made mistakes every day! Who was he to claim that Snoke wasn’t truly sorry for his past missteps?! And anyway, he wouldn’t be doing this job forever! It would be great training to swim with the sharks for a while, he had figured. The agency’s grad program was excellent, too, he had found out.

His uncle and mother had been furious while he had warmed up to the idea.

Both had been besides themselves, even after he had told them that this was just a chance to learn. He still had had several options back then. It would have been stupid not to consider a perfectly good and reputable job-offer. And the money was good! He’d be able to be independent. While money had never been a problem, he thought himself too old to depend on his family’s money. His mother had taken this as the only reason he had wanted to work for Snoke, reminding him that if he only thought about financial gain then he’d find himself stuck in jobs like this, that legal representation should be about what was right, not about who paid the most.

They had argued all night, his uncle becoming more of a silent party at some point, lost deep in thought.

“And then you fucking went ahead and pulled my diploma!” he had snapped at his uncle as they had reached that part of the conversation.

“No!” Luke had simply stated, which had almost had Kylo jump out of his skin in blind rage.

“What do you mean, ‘No!’? Of course you did, I had the fucking Dean call me repeatedly and the fucking LHR you all claimed wanting me to succeed at rejected my application because they too received news that I had apparently cheated in my finals.”

His voice had risen with every syllable leaving his mouth. The shame he had felt back then still ate on him sometimes.

“I thought about it! I talked about it with your mother!” Luke had told him in a beseeching tone of voice. “She almost ripped my head off over the phone for the mere suggestion, but I never went ahead to do it. When we hung up that night, I saw that it would do more harm than good.”

Kylo had laughed cruelly.

“So what? My diploma magically vanished over night?”

“I don’t know! All I can say is that I didn’t do anything to it.” Luke defended himself.

“Sure!” his voice had been dripping with sarcasm.

“Your parents didn’t believe me either. They thought I had done it, but I swear I didn’t. I didn’t call the school board, nor did I ever claim that you cheated on your finals. I wanted you to go work for the LHR, why would I sabotage that?”

“Then who did? Because they were very clear not being able to accept any applicants who were accused of fraud. You told people that I paid some other guy to write my exam for me.”

Luke looked taken aback.

“What, like on Suits?” he asked flabbergasted. “Ben, I’m your uncle, I think I’d realize if you had sent a different person, no?”

“What, so the Dean is a liar?”

“No, but this makes no sense! I’d look like an idiot myself for not realizing that my own nephew suddenly looked rather different.”

That had silenced him.

Luke had went on, had explained as to why he had not accepted Leia’s calls to explain himself. There had been nothing to explain and when he had received several calls from more than one firm Ben had applied to, asking about the problems with the diploma he had jumped into action. And the next thing he had known was that he had been sued by Snoke’s firm, which had stepped in quickly to support his nephew.

There had been a request to withdraw the diploma and in Luke’s name too, but… it had been the first Luke had heard about it himself.

He had tried to argue, had asked for time to check the database, sure there must’ve been someone who had messed with the system. However, it had been deemed extremely unlikely that some hacker would be happy with deleting just Ben’s diploma on false charges. Having been too busy defending his own name and the reputation of his school had only kept him from speaking to Leia and Han for longer than he should’ve allowed. By the time it had all been over, Ben had accepted the offer of the one person who had stood by him and had turned out to be the only successful job offer that had remained after the whole mess; Snoke.

It had been weird, the whole situation had been. Then, with a few years between the initial shock and betrayal, Kylo Ren couldn’t help but wonder whether his uncle was lying his ass off. To what end? He had nothing to gain, did he?

Back then, he hadn’t really talked to Luke about the whole mess. He had shown up on Christmas that year, had broken all ties with his family when they still dared to doubt his words and Snoke’s role as a well-meaning person who had done nothing but help him when none of them had even so much as made a single phone call to defend him.

Once more, he sighed, the sound being drowned out by the water.

 

* * *

 

“Why is it always the hard way with you?” Leia hissed at her husband. They were facing off in the kitchen, both red-faced and glaring at each other. “You couldn’t just keep your mouth shut, couldn’t you?”

“I will not be told to mind my tongue in my own house!” Han growled and Leia rolled her eyes.

“This is Luke’s and my house, Han.” she reminded him in a dry tone that sounded neither amused nor particularly fazed by her husband’s attempted macho demeanour.

“What happened to ‘What’s mine is yours’ and all that?” he demanded sarcastically and Rey, lurking by the door, flinched. Arguments really weren’t her favourite things to witness. She’d rather walk in on two people having sex than listen to a fight. Especially when they got as loud as Leia and Han did. She was gathering the courage to intervene when Leia hissed:

“What happened to ‘Let’s not antagonize Ben!’? We talked about it, Han!” she now sounded close to crying, her voice rising again to cover it up. The expression on Han’s face taught Rey that she had failed at masking her emotions.

“He’s my son, Leia! I can’t stand the idea of him just being swallowed up again by that…”

“And what do you think he’s to me? My favourite neighbour?” Leia leaned onto the counter with one hand, covering her eyes with her other. “I’d see him more often if he were my neighbour. And now he’ll go back and be a stranger to us again.”

It was the agony in the other woman’s voice that encouraged Rey to clear her throat. Han’s brows went up and he stared at the young woman standing in the door, while Leia slowly turned her gaze towards Rey.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to listen in…” she explained quickly and in a careful tone, but Leia waved her hand in a dismissive way.

“I am sure Lando could listen in on the whole conversation from his room in the second floor…”

Han, for the first time tonight, looked somewhat sheepish, his hand rubbing at the back of his head. Not meeting Rey’s eyes, the man sighed.

“Is there something you need, Rey?” Leia asked, making an effort to force a smile onto her face.

She faked it well. Rey figured that the older woman would need it once she would really start getting involved in politics. But still, it came off as less warm, lacking its usual ease and confidence.

“I just wanted to see whether the two of you are all right.” her voice sounded thin and meek to her own ears, their sudden changes of expression proving to her that it’s effect was far more severe on their own ears. Leia bowed her head, closing her eyes, whilst Han made a face as if he had just bitten into a lemon.

“Don’t worry about us, kid.” he attempted to reassure her. “Barking dogs don’t bite.”   
Leia let out a soft, short laugh.

“Speak only for yourself.” Here she winked at Rey, sounding almost playful then and Han snorted. “I am sorry for worrying you, dear. Aren’t we?” she asked, addressing her husband.

“I am fine… and listen; I really think that Kylo enjoyed his stay here. He was very nervous; don’t tell him I said that! But I think that the last couple of days were important for him, too.” Rey rambled, walking towards the counter Leia leaned on.

“That is nice of you to say, dear. But that man he works for… this will sound ridiculous, but Snoke is a bad man. The worst kind, really. When Ben returns to New York and is back in that man’s clutches, none of his goodness will remain over time, I fear. He’ll be completely swallowed by that man’s crooked deals and disgusting clients.”

Rey, eager to make her see that this wouldn’t be true, took a deep breath. Maybe she was overstepping here. Kylo would probably be mad about her telling Leia and Han about what she had found out only recently. However, the way she saw it, there was no use in keeping quiet about a fact that would put Leia’s mind at ease and make her proud of the man her son was at the same time.

“Yes, but you see; he has his own clients too. He works with an organisation that helps kids and assists them legally in his free time. Kylo is doing what is right despite working for that man Snoke.”

Han snorted.

“Not a big fan of him either, are you?” he wondered, while Leia had perked up upon hearing Rey’s words, looking very interested.

“Which organisation? Does Snoke know?” she inquired eagerly.

Rey bit her lip. She hadn’t asked what the organisation was called and just knew that it was based in New York. A real girlfriend would know such things. But a real girlfriend would also be with Kylo right now, whereas she had deemed it so much more important for him to finally talk to that foolish, yet well-meaning uncle of his. A real girlfriend might’ve been more busy agreeing with everything Kylo said, while Rey –as a neutral party– considered it much more important for those idiotic, wonderful people to finally talk about things that hurt and work it out.

“You should talk to him about that. You really should.” She encouraged the other woman. “He looks so happy and passionate whenever he mentions that work. I think it is where he feels truly at home. Snoke just pays the bills, but his heart isn’t in it, I can feel it!”

There were tears in Leia’s beautiful brown eyes, yet she smiled while reaching for Han who stepped towards his wife to wrap her in his arms.

“He’s still my good boy, I told you.” Rey could hear despite Leia’s voice being muffled by Han’s shoulder.

“Of course he is, princess. He is a Solo.” Pressing a kiss against his wife’s hair, Han smiled to himself, then at Rey. “Still… that usb-stick…” he muttered after a moment and Leia shook her head.

“He had ample opportunity and I found nothing on my laptop that doesn’t belong there, neither did Lando and you know he’s good with that kind of stuff.”

Rey frowned, asking what they were talking about, but Leia shook her head when Han made to answer.

“You ought to ask him. I am sure I’ll do the same when the two of you wake up tomorrow. Not tonight. We’re all a little too stressed out for a reasonable conversation.”

What the woman said was logical, but she was reminded on the things Han had said during dinner, about Kylo spying on his mother. She really hoped she had misunderstood that, but decided to careful inquire later on. Maybe it wasn’t her place to do so, but Kylo seemed too honest, too straightforward to do such things and he had always answered every question she had had. He had pampered her, never telling her that something wasn’t her business. She wondered whether that was why she sometimes forgot that she was only here because he hired her.

 _He asked me out though, so it can’t all be about the money…,_ she thought to herself, a small smile spreading on her face.

They all walked up together and while Rey was fully determined to go and check on Kylo and Luke –making sure they hadn’t killed each other yet– when shouting could be heard. Han made a face and wanted to storm up the stairs to break the fight up, but both Leia and Rey talked him out of it. This was long overdue.

“But where is the girl supposed to sleep?” Han queried, gesturing at Rey. “Do you expect her to go and have a snooze while those two work out their differences?”

“I’ll just watch some TV until they’re done. The fire is on, so it’s nice and warm down here. Anyway, they can’t be at it all night. Yelling is exhausting.”

At that, Luke raised his voice for once, followed by Kylo sounding very upset.

“Let’s hope they know that too!” Han growled, rolling his eyes.

“Would you like for me to stay up with you, dear?” Leia offered kindly, but judging from her tired eyes, Rey elected to thank her, but sent her to bed either way. It would’ve been nice to talk to the other woman, but the day had probably been a bit too stressful for everyone in Skywalker Lodge.

It wasn’t often she had time to just sit back and watch TV, though, so she wasn’t really bothered by being alone for a bit. Outside, the snow was rising gradually and she was throwing a few side-glances every so often while enjoying a re-run of A Christmas Carol. By now, the shouting from upstairs had subsided and she grinned to herself as she gathered a woollen blanket around her. The weather outside might be nasty, but secretly, now that she was relaxing inside where it was warm and having been assured that Leia had not heard anything on the radio about anyone having had any problems on their way down the mountain, she enjoyed it immensely. It was a beautiful sight, seeing the world being covered by a glistering mantle of white powder. She’d however keep this opinion to herself, not convinced that anyone would share her enthusiasm.

Watching Ebenezer Scrooge take off with the Ghost of Christmas Present, she slowly smiled, recalling what her own Christmas had been like, her eyes growing heavy while she absentmindedly played with the little snowflake pendant.

 

* * *

 

He waited for her to come up after he had finished his long shower. It had gotten late and still, the snow wouldn’t let up. Beginning to worry, he set his timer a little bit earlier than he had planned to, considering that they ought to leave a bit earlier. He’d also call the airline again tomorrow to make sure there’d be no delays that might cause problems with the flight they had to catch in Chicago. While they had an hour and a half between flights, there might still be problems he couldn’t foresee right now. God, he hated nature sometimes!

His eyes drifted towards the clock, and he had to look twice, shocked at how late it truly was. How long had Luke and he been at it?   
Where was Rey?

About to get up and go looking for her, a soft knock was heard from the door and relief washed over him.

“Yeah.” he called and the relief he had felt a second ago was erased when he saw his mother. Her hair was down and she was wearing her glasses when she had worn contacts all day. The long, white and silver dressing gown she wore looked warm and elegant, an effect completely ruined by the fluffy Mickey Mouse pyjama pants she wore beneath. “Mom!”

Breathlessly, he stumbled to his feet, staring at the tiny woman in front of him, incapable of saying anything. They stood facing one another for a moment, physically not quite unlike his stand-off with Luke. Yet, his mother, so much smaller than him and his uncle, had him freeze in his movements where his uncle’s mere presence had instantly sent him into a violent rage. Having tried to wrestle past Luke had proven to be a futile undertaking, the man –despite his age and being one prosthetic hand– had easily forced him back, threatening to push him against a wall an keep him there until he had calmed himself.

Where his uncle had him filled to the brim with red, searing rage, his mother had him freeze with a dull sense of emptiness and paralyzing shame. In the past, he had pushed both emotions away with the anger he still felt six years after she had refused to stand by him.

But with Luke and him having talked about it for the first time now, he found that he didn’t know what to think. Confused and a little embarrassed, he opened his mouth as he had no idea as to what to feel.

“Listen– About earlier…”

Where Luke had needed his whole body to make him listen, the mere lifting of a small hand silenced him now, her facial expression stern, but not furious.

“If you have something to say to me, you will do so tomorrow. I can’t listen to anymore.” She told him, the slight tremor in her voice the only indicator that she was beyond exhausted. Not wishing to add insult to injury, he nodded. “I only came here, wondering whether I raised a fool who allows a lovely girl like Rey to sleep on the couch rather than apologize for making her uncomfortable.”

“I-I was waiting for her.” he stuttered, explaining himself like a boy who had brought home a D in an important exam, guilt slicing into the lines of his face.

“Oh Ben…” she sighed, sounding more and more tired by the second.

Mother and son stood facing each other. Slowly, he lowered his head, full lips slightly apart as if ready to defend himself if only he could think of the words he’d need for that herculean task. Truth be told; he had nothing, his head empty while his chest felt close to bursting.

Reaching out, she squeezed his hand, nodded and then stepped back.

“Good night, Ben.”

“G-Good night, Mom.”

Ben didn’t even have the clarity to remind him of the other name.

 

The house was silent while he made his way downstairs. Hearing the TV as he walked down the stairs, he was able to make out the outlines of a body curled up on the couch beneath a blanket.

They were left in almost complete darkness after he turned off the TV, the only source of light coming from the dying glow of the fire and the lights of the nearby Christmas tree. Outside, the world had been conquered by desolate frost, creeping up the glass of the windows, while they were basked in a soft, golden light that was a beacon in such severe iciness.

Careful not to wake her, he crouched down next to the sleeping girl. The light of the fire was dancing across her soft, freckled skin. Like a boy, worried that he might break something fragile, he reached out and gently ran his fingertips down her warmed cheekbone, chased the line of her jawbone before he allowed his thumb to caress her chin.

A small smile had sneaked onto his face, he realized belatedly as he had allowed his eyes to linger on her features.

“Rey?”

His voice was a husky rumble, yet barely above a whisper, failing him almost.

She didn’t even stir and he sighed, still smiling at the peaceful sight, thrilled by the idea of this girl being willing to go out with him. It was this thought he tried to focus on, disregarding the reason why she was here and how they had met in the first place.

He felt calm and yet on edge and he loved it.

After a few heartbeats, he began to worry that she might get cold if they stayed down here. Unwilling to wake her up, he carefully drew back the blanket she had been wrapped in, leaned over her, placing one arm beneath her knees and the other around her shoulders, lifting her with ease, startled at how right it felt to hold her like this.

While he hadn’t meant to jostle her too much, she immediately stirred in his arms, jumping slightly. Hushing her, he just stood there, holding her close as the fire was reduced to a few glowing embers.

“It’s just me.” he cooed, his voice reduced to a raspy mess.

As if registering who it was that held her, Rey rested her head in the crook of his neck, nuzzling his skin there, seeking warmth.

“What happened?” she mumbled into his skin.

“You fell asleep.” he didn’t dare raise his voice over the soft whispers that were spoken against the hairs on her head. She had been peacefully asleep after a long, stressful day that had ended in loud shouting, which he knew she hated more than anything.

She nodded slowly, her voice thick with sleep as she asked:

“Did Luke and you talk after shouting?”

“We didn’t scare you, did we?” he asked, thumb massaging her back absentmindedly, determined to make her feel safe without even realizing it.

“It’s okay.” she murmured, her fingers curling into his shirt.

His eyes closed in shame and with a sigh, he sat down, lowering her onto his lap. Immediately she snuggled closer to him and he reached for the discarded blanket to cover her with it.

“No.” he disagreed. “I scared you and that’s not okay.”

Her hand was warm as it cupped his cheek. A tired, but sweet smile was on her pretty lips.

“You were angry.” she simply stated, eyes shining in the dim light.

“Still…” his nose brushed her hair as he pressed his lips against her forehead, the back of her head resting in his palm to stabilize her. “I am sorry, Rey.”

She wrapped her arms around his neck and nuzzled his cheek and he sighed contently, embracing her with his free arm.

“I know.” she whispered.

Leaning back, he was happy with holding her for a moment; enjoy the feeling of her being close. When her fingers began to run through his hair, his eyes grew heavy as he relaxed in the gentle hold she had on him.

“You’re not going to fall asleep on me, are you, Kylo?” she admonished playfully, eyeing him with a grin.

He shook his head quickly and she softly giggled, her fingers proceeding their way through his locks, dull nails sending pleasurable little jolts up and down his spine as her nose gently nudged his and both were stunned into silence for a moment. Their eyes met and his heart felt like it paused mid-beat. If the dwindling light didn’t play any tricks on him, her hazel orbs flicked down to his lips and back up again several times. She ran her little teeth over her blush bottom lip before her tongue wet the tantalizingly inviting skin.

“We should go to bed though. You’ll get cold.” he urged, eyes holding hers. Slowly, she closed her eyes and he swore he felt the tips of her eyelashes brush his skin.

“Just a little longer.” she begged, kissing the tip of his nose lightly. “Please?”

Taking a shuddering breath and feeling overwhelmed –not for the first time today– he allowed his hands to run down to her body, encouraging her to straddle him as he carefully lifted her hips. She complied, settling down again, her eyes wide and shy. The woman in his lap looked delectable and once more he found his gaze linger on her lips.

Still, she caressed him, fingers running over the nape of his neck.

It felt far too nice to put a stop to it, so he pressed a little peck onto her cheekbone.

“Everything for you, Rey.”

His heart stopped when her lips pressed against the corner of his mouth, lingering. It had been their first rule. Well, their second, after her insistence of not having her hair ruffled. No kissing on the mouth. Deep down he knew that and Rey surely remembered too. Yet…

Once more her lips pressed against the corner of his mouth. More insistent, the pressure just a little more intense. As if she wasn’t altogether certain he caught her meaning with the first short peck.

Swallowing thickly, he turned his head slightly, lips barely apart. If he spoke now his lips would brush hers. Their eyes met once more and his hands grabbed her small waist when she took a shuddering breath that was loud in his ears.

He couldn’t think when he felt the softest whisper of her lips against his, the faint pressure too delicious to withstand it’s teasing nature.

 

* * *

 

She felt lightheaded, her limbs heavy and weightless at the same time as his plush lips found hers. Her eyes closed as her world zeroed in on the sensation of kissing Kylo. His body was hard and warm beneath her, while his kiss was tender and careful yet, though she could tell that he was moving slower than he’d probably like to. It was a sweet kind of kiss, not reluctant, but almost innocent in it’s startled nature. That changed soon and she could tell the exact moment he realized that this was truly happening. Those perfect lips devoured her and she couldn’t help but sigh happily.

Needing to be closer still, Rey was thankful for the two strong arms that pulled her body into his chest. Somehow her fingers wrapped themselves into his beautiful, soft hair, causing him to groan in delight as their kiss morphed from sweet to passionate and back to almost playful teasing.

Kylo didn’t seem in a hurry to stop, lazily running his tongue over her bottom lip, urging her to open for him. Gently, but insistent he took control, his tongue against hers, causing her to groan.

When they drew back after a few more moments, she practically whined, surging forward to seek his lips once more. He met her with equal enthusiasm, unwinding beneath her, hands splaying over her torso.

She needed him to touch her. His eyes were hungry in the dim light of the room as he opened them briefly after they came apart for air. They’re both adults. When he leaned forward to claim her lips once more she tried not to give a damn about Maz’ rules. But instead of another deep kiss, he simply, but lovingly pressed his lips against her mouth before resting his forehead against hers.

She could see that he was smiling. Happily, she tried to brush her lips against his once more, but he gently cupped her jaw, thumb sealing her lips.

“Maz will kill us, sweetheart.” he reminded her, but there was no worry in his voice.

“I won’t tell her if you don’t?” she suggested, lips closing around his thumb, teeth grazing against his skin before gently sucking, eyes never leaving his.

Kylo chuckled, wrapping her into his arms, pressing a kiss against her temple.

“Very tempting.” he commented, fingers slowly running up her spine, causing her to shiver as he traced the delicate skin beneath her shirt. “But…” here he sighed and Rey frowned, understanding that he obviously had other concerns besides being murdered by Maz.

“What’s wrong?” she wondered, tenderly placing a strand of his dark hair behind his ear.

Pulling her back against him, his breath tickled her ear.

“I am still paying you, Rey…”

Oh.

Yeah.

Now that he mentioned it…

“Bit of a turn-off, that.” she sighed, understanding why he was reluctant.

“Indeed it is.” he nodded, grinning slightly.

Biting her lip, she searched his eyes and placed a quick kiss onto his red, swollen lips.

“But you liked it… Right?” Rey asked, feeling insecure. He was a lot more experienced than her and while nobody had yet declared her a shitty kisser, a 30 year old was a bit of a difference to the college boys she had made out with in the past. Had he taken another two minutes to stop them, he would’ve kissed her silly. She couldn’t remember ever having enjoyed kissing someone more. He had held her closer when she had needed it without even having to tell him, had been careful not to step over any boundaries, while not being too careful. It had been perfect for her and the idea that he might feel less satisfied with her was gruelling.

The low growl he made in the back of his throat as he nipped at her earlobe, causing her to jump in his lap, reassured her.

“If you kiss me like that during our date, we will have to skip dessert.”

She snorted, reaching for his face so he’d look at her as she gave him a stern look.

“No kisses for you then, because dessert is the best part.” Rey decided, being very prepared to wait until after their date for the continuation of what they had just started.

Squealing softly as his fingers pinched her sides, she quickly covered her mouth, not wanting to wake anyone. Finding each other’s eyes, they snorted.

Just when he made to get up, she placed another quick kiss against his forehead.

“This is nice.” Rey breathed, soft smile on her lips.

Once more, with one hand splayed over the small of her back and the other cupping her cheek he leaned in to leave a soft, lingering kiss against her lips that made her whole body sing with longing.

“Yes it is.” he breathed, warmth and excitement setting Rey’s nerves on fire.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> LHR = Lawyers for Human Rights.


End file.
